Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread: I'm Stuck

  1. #1

    I'm Stuck

    My girlfriend and I had previously been together for just over 6 months and we both meant the world to one another. One day, seemingly out of the blue, she began avoiding me and ignoring my texts/calls. When I tried talking to her about it she became extremely upset and refused to discuss further. She texted me later that day, saying she needed a break from me and our relationship and that she was tired of me stressing her out constantly.

    It's been about a month and not much has changed. I've asked her a few times whether or not she's ready for another relationship, but the answer has always been a definitive no.

    I don't consider myself to be a very stressful or pushy person, but she claims this is the reason she needs a break. I would do anything for this girl and I still love her with all my heart. I know she does as well and she's told me she would love to get back together if it wasn't so stressful for her. I want to try to show her I can change but I'm not sure how. I'm just at a loss of what to do.

    How would I go about regaining her trust? Is the relationship even worth trying to save at this point? Please help.

    - Paul

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Carus's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    I Can See The Sun!
    Posts
    2,218
    Gender
    Male
    Sounds like she wasn't invested in the relationship as much as you thought she was, or indeed as you were.....

    Your love for her has now escalated due to the rejection....Nobody likes rejection...

    And I'm only speculating here so please don't read too much into it ok, but I'll put it out there: If the relationship was as perfect as you say it was, and for her to pull out so suddenly then I'm sorry to say, there MAY be a third party involved....

    She says the RS was stressing her out.....Were you doing things that would stress her out? Being needy, clingy, over jealous, over controlling...? Be honest here....

    Sorry for the pain you will feel over this.

    Carus*

  3. #3
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Posts
    10,333
    If she asked for a break from you, why are you asking her "a few times" to get back together?

    Space means space, not you asking her multiple times when she's going to take you back.

    Are you willing to step aside and give her the actual break she's asking for? There's no guarantee stepping back will bring her back, but I CAN guarantee repeatedly asking her if she's ready to come back will drive her further away.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Carus's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    I Can See The Sun!
    Posts
    2,218
    Gender
    Male
    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    ....but I CAN guarantee repeatedly asking her if she's ready to come back will drive her further away.
    Yup....

    Carus*

  5.  

  6. #5
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    California
    Posts
    4,025
    Gender
    Male
    Okay, you will have to explain something to me. How could you say "out of the blue" then say you "I want to try to show her I can change".
    Im going to tell you that no, you have not changed. Change takes time and by you constantly reaching out to her only signals to her that you in fact you have not changed. You are only reinforcing her decision to break up with you. If you really care for her, then you must stop reaching out or stalking her social media.
    I know you want her to know what want to be with her. Oh, believe me, she knows you are out there and if she wants to come back to you, all she has to do is call. So leave her alone. I know you don't want her to meet other guys or see other guys, and she might meet someone else or has already, so you will just have to trust that while you dated you were the best guy for her. However she will have to decide that on her own without any help from you. So if you want any chance then you have to leave her be. That doesn't mean you have given up or means that you have closed the door, just means that you have matured and honored her request.


Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •