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Left confused and angry is it rebound


Texas1234

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Im 27 shes 29.With ex nearly 3 years stayed in contact for 4 months after break up taking about what went wrong and so on as friends,,but a week before she got with the new man she cried in my face saying she loved me and missed me and performed a sexual act on me my mind is boggled I took her for granted in the relationship but was willing to change but she got in new relationship its public on facebook could ye help with answers maybe he's a better catch ?she wouldn't give me answer so trying find them me self she block me from everything

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Sorry to hear this. It sounds like it wasn't working if you were "taking her for granted". It normal to go not contact and delete and block an ex. You should do the same. Stop contacting her looking for answers.

I took her for granted in the relationship but was willing to change but she got in new relationship its public on facebook
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Im 27 shes 29.With ex nearly 3 years stayed in contact for 4 months after break up taking about what went wrong and so on as friends,,but a week before she got with the new man she cried in my face saying she loved me and missed me and performed a sexual act on me my mind is boggled I took her for granted in the relationship but was willing to change but she got in new relationship its public on facebook could ye help with answers maybe he's a better catch ?she wouldn't give me answer so trying find them me self she block me from everything

 

Here's the problem. Did she express to you that she felt taken for granted, neglected?

 

When someone feels taken for granted, their interest tends to fade over time too. Thus, by the time the breakup actually happens, they're much more emotionally prepared to move on. What this means is that the next option that comes along, who does take an interest, seems that much more appealing.

 

Why did you two actually break up, for reference? Did she end it or did you?

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Nothing confusing at all. It's the too little too late concept. If you take a woman for granted long enough, eventually you'll find yourself single.

She wasn't crying for you, she was crying for her broken dreams, for what could have been, but never was with you. It was closure for her, not a promise to stick around waiting on you some more. She already waited and hoped long enough, now she is done.

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She did well in deleting and blocking. Exes aren't supposed to be friends and continue contact right after break up. No contact helps a lot in healing. I'm sure that now you too can move on easier too. Also, don't waste time trying to guess if this new guy is a rebound or not. Focus on yourself and your healing. Good luck.

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Hello,she ended It treated her like crap ,I was deeply sorry she said her heart told her yes and head told her no to fix things she was deeply upset when we meet but now shes so happy 2 weeks later with new guy ,,maybe its something new for her this new guy and forget our bad relationship

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He is not necessarily a better catch. He is just new and shiny. She hasn't had any bad experiences with him so she sees him in a very positive light, full of hope for the future, while you two have already tried and the negative outweighed the positive. She was feeling lonely, which is why she continued to talk to you and then stopped the moment she found someone new. Imo, you need to take this as a sign that you two are not suited for each other. If she was really the one for you, she wouldn't have been able to go to another person like that. You two were not compatible, therefore, what she does from now on is irrelevant. It does suck when they do that, but it's a clear answer that they are not the one for you. Do yourself a favour and block her. Stalking her on social media or learning things about her and her new beau from other people is the absolute worst you can do to yourself. It will keep you stuck in the past and prolong your suffering. Even if she were to return, imo, it would be a bad idea to reconcile. You two had a toxic relationship and she gave up. The reasons for the break up were valid but still, if she was capable to replace you so easily, that is an even clearer sign that she is not a good potential life partner for you. Just make sure that you learn the lesson for your next relationship. Don't treat the next girl you meet like crap and do not take her for granted like that. If you succeed that, then your next relationship will be much better.

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Ok, rather than contacting her looking for answers or pondering her new love life. See this as a golden opportunity and a wake up call for the future.

 

That means a self improvement program. Get in in shape, update your look. If you have bad habits: drinking, smoking, drugs, too much video games, etc look into getting rid of those. And clean out any other self defeating time wasting areas of your life.

 

Take some courses and classes. Improve your mind and body. Join some groups and clubs. Most of all enlist the help of a therapist short term to discover better ways to communicate and conduct a relationship. Perhaps explore the "treated her like crap" factor and how to prevent that in the future.

Hello,she ended It treated her like crap ,.maybe its something new for her this new guy and forget our bad relationship
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