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Thread: Found the one.....sheís married

  1. #21
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    Originally Posted by ThatwasThen
    Yes, good luck. I hope she knows what she wants whether it be to be married to him or divorced and with you. Either way its time you found out and go from there. You appear to have a head on your shoulders so go forward using it and leave your heart off your sleeve for the time being.
    Sheís told me what she wants, and that it is me and the person I am.
    I told her that she should try and fix her marriage some time ago, like go try therapy to see if things can change for the better. I encouraged it. No matter how I felt about her. So she asked her husband to try, and he said no. She wasnít too estatic to do it either, but she did nonetheless.
    Iíve never been with or pursued a married woman, I feel guilty here, but despite I do have a good head on my shoulders, there is something strong here and I have to set it right. Henceforth the decision I am prepared to make. I will have to hide the heart on my sleeve, which is hard to do, but I can and I will. I am glad I reached out to this forum and experienced the good bad and the ugly of it. Sure, I could end up the next guy to be cheated on, like some here say. but sheís so upfront about her feelings and where she stands, how could a guy not listen or ignore unless heís just not interested anymore? And if thatís the case, then say it and be a man, or a real person or something. Itís not like she talks unreasonable, or illogical, which btw...another turn on. Sheís told me that she hates the fact that I might forever think she would do the same to me. Kills her to know that the thought could always be there, and wants to prove otherwise. Thatís what I like about her. Itís all real and out there for me to see, and with no games. When I finally have her, she will be treated like a queen, and thatís a fact. She knows that. I probably went through my other relationships to get to where I am, and for a reason. I believe that reason is her.
    What does a woman really want anyway? Exactly what I will offer and why shouldnít she have it? Just makes her that much more of a woman. Oh, and shoes. She can own as many of those as she wants. I will figure out what to do if we run out of space. Sorry to put the carriage before the horse, but Iím a bit of a planner. Probably happening if Iím to open Pandoraís box. Lol.
    We got this, and yes i am confident in knowing that it will be only be what many others wish they could find. Simplicity, and Devine.
    Crazy, yes, obtainable, yes, difficult, yes, patience, yes, finding that one, one of a million. You do what you have to if you find it, to protect it and then make the right choices.
    In this case, saving face. Thatís the other reason I reached out. So glad I did.

  2. #22
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    Not to burst the planning and excitement bubble, but it will get harder before it gets better. She may not follow through with it. Make the decision not to get involved with a married woman for you, not for her.

  3. #23
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    Originally Posted by Pleasedonot5
    Not to burst the planning and excitement bubble, but it will get harder before it gets better. She may not follow through with it. Make the decision not to get involved with a married woman for you, not for her.
    Thanks man. I have, I understand what you say, have accepted that and thereís a small chance that she wont follow through. If she doesnít, it never was, and then Iíll just look like an idiot here. Iím fine with that, because it would steer me another way.
    It will have to be more work on her end than mine, not that I wonít try to help, but she needs to be strong and tend to her own affairs and arrangements. Sheís said exactly that to me many times before.
    But ultimately, if thatís to happen then my decision to do what I have found here would save me in the long run of it all. Not my first time to make bad choices, Iíve had my share, just not this ďkindĒ of bad choice, if in fact thatís what it is.
    I have plenty of other things that keep me busy, but completing my heart has been the hardest. Except for my daughter, but thatís a different kind of love. Unconditional, something we all should have no matter who it is. Hard to obtain. That kind of love has been solid since day one, and she doesnít want to see me let down yet again.

  4. #24
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    Originally Posted by TexasD123
    Thanks man. I have, I understand what you say, have accepted that and thereís a small chance that she wont follow through. If she doesnít, it never was, and then Iíll just look like an idiot here. Iím fine with that, because it would steer me another way.
    It will have to be more work on her end than mine, not that I wonít try to help, but she needs to be strong and tend to her own affairs and arrangements. Sheís said exactly that to me many times before.
    But ultimately, if thatís to happen then my decision to do what I have found here would save me in the long run of it all. Not my first time to make bad choices, Iíve had my share, just not this ďkindĒ of bad choice, if in fact thatís what it is.
    I have plenty of other things that keep me busy, but completing my heart has been the hardest. Except for my daughter, but thatís a different kind of love. Unconditional, something we all should have no matter who it is. Hard to obtain. That kind of love has been solid since day one, and she doesnít want to see me let down yet again.
    Unconditional!

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  6. #25
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    Are you supposed to let her live with you, pay for her divorce or support her? Is that why she is using the $$$ excuse to not get divorced? Don't give her money. Don't take the bait. Yes be the "better person" and let her go until she decides what she wants.
    Originally Posted by TexasD123
    -Itís only hard for her to get out because of $$
    -I actually think she is waiting for ďMEĒ to do something about it.
    -Now itís clear in what needs to happen.
    I think she will look back at this play no matter how much it may sting now, understand it and totally appreciate what I am about to do. And thatís to be a better individual, not just for me but for her too.

  7. #26
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Are you supposed to let her live with you, pay for her divorce or support her? Is that why she is using the $$$ excuse to not get divorced? Don't give her money. Don't take the bait. Yes be the "better person" and let her go until she decides what she wants.
    No sir, and no way! Sorry for the confusion. I can see how you read that differently than I intended.
    I meant, I have to cut her loose.

  8. #27
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Ok, good decision.
    Originally Posted by TexasD123
    I have to cut her loose.

  9. #28
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Ok, good decision.
    BTW, Wise. She doesnít want money from me, hasnít ever asked for directly or indirectly and I wonít be offering it. She has been saving up to make the move for a while now, and has said she has plans on pulling it off this summer and Sheís established a deadline. What has to happen on her end will require at least 5k, to get an attorney, to pay for her move, and to get a place. Said that she does not want to put any of the strain on me or any drama that may come with it.
    Itís hers to deal with, and she wants to do it for herself. Felt I needed to mention that.
    Iím going to let her go, and when she gets all that done, Iíll be right there.

  10. #29
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    Originally Posted by TexasD123
    Uh, Jim. I believe you are referring to another post made by someone else, you see that wasnít me saying that, right?
    If anything, Iíve said I feel like a greedy jerk after receiving advice in this forum. Thatís all. Self critical and hardly defensive Capiche? No offense.
    Oops, sorry about that. I think I need my eyes checked :)

  11. #30
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    One of my family members was "in a relationship" with a married woman. She too was "going to get a divorce" and move in with him.

    That was supposed to happen November 2015. It's coming up on February 2019 and she still isn't there.

    I guess you'll see if she is truly getting a divorce or just wanted some attention.

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