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Thread: Not sure what to do - do I leave it or see what happens

  1. #11
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    Thank you guys
    For the advice
    Iv taken it on board
    Today I havenít contacted him at all
    Iím stepping back to see if he will contact me

    He has been moaning about Ď dry January Ď so perhaps could be another reason why his been so weird with me and kinda lost interest who knows. I donít know.

    We have stuff booked in for February / March so we will see what happens

    I need to date other people aswell
    But when I like someone even with dating Iím quiet loyal and put all my attention into one person. But maybe I need to stop that incase his dating someone else and it doesnít work out.


    X x x

  2. #12
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    Originally Posted by michkath
    He has been moaning about Ď dry January Ď so perhaps could be another reason why his been so weird with me and kinda lost interest who knows. I donít know.
    Girl, no. Please don't start grasping at straws like this.

    A guy who likes you and wants to be with you isn't going to be "weird" with you because he's laying off the booze for a few weeks. Unless he's an actual alcoholic and going through withdrawals, you're really reaching with that as a possible explanation for his behaviour.

    I don't know what you have planned for the next couple months with him, but I don't think you should count on it going the way you'd hoped.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by michkath
    I need to date other people aswell
    But when I like someone even with dating Iím quiet loyal and put all my attention into one person. But maybe I need to stop that incase his dating someone else and it doesnít work out.
    I might catch some flack for this, but until things are exclusive I always think it's a good idea to keep dating, exploring other options.

    Maybe it's just some swiping and chatting on an app, or a little meet up that is nice but doesn't have the vibes. No biggie. Just allows you to keep your feet on the ground, to not get too carried away in the crush stage, and to remember that the person you're most interested is just on of manyóan option, and only a viable one if he/she shares your level of interest.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member IAmFCA's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by bluecastle
    I might catch some flack for this, but until things are exclusive I always think it's a good idea to keep dating, exploring other options.

    Maybe it's just some swiping and chatting on an app, or a little meet up that is nice but doesn't have the vibes. No biggie. Just allows you to keep your feet on the ground, to not get too carried away in the crush stage, and to remember that the person you're most interested is just on of manyóan option, and only a viable one if he/she shares your level of interest.
    I agree completely. Dating is for dating. Date date date.

    The unspoken reality is, this may mean no sex. Because it can be messy to have sex and multidate. It may be tough to think about, but its worth the effort.

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  6. #15
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by IAmFCA
    I agree completely. Dating is for dating. Date date date.

    The unspoken reality is, this may mean no sex. Because it can be messy to have sex and multidate. It may be tough to think about, but its worth the effort.
    Or it can be really fun to have sex and multidate!

    Kidding! Sort of! I donít multi and tell...

    Anyhow, I do think going on some other dates/exploring options can be really good in these situations. Like, letís say dude is into her, but just hiccuping a bit, for whatever reason, and heís a week or two away from coming back around? Well, those are long days when theyíre spent obsessing and posting about things, but shorter days when theyíre spent having a beer with a nice dude or two. Then when dude swings back around youíre not in a knotóand if he continues to drift, who cares? Youíre still remembering that there are other nice dudes out there.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member IAmFCA's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by bluecastle
    Or it can be really fun to have sex and multidate!

    Kidding! Sort of! I donít multi and tell...

    Anyhow, I do think going on some other dates/exploring options can be really good in these situations. Like, letís say dude is into her, but just hiccuping a bit, for whatever reason, and heís a week or two away from coming back around? Well, those are long days when theyíre spent obsessing and posting about things, but shorter days when theyíre spent having a beer with a nice dude or two. Then when dude swings back around youíre not in a knotóand if he continues to drift, who cares? Youíre still remembering that there are other nice dudes out there.
    Agree on all points. ! ;)

  8. #17
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    Iím not rushing into having sex with this guy.
    If / when it happens it happens.
    Iv re opened my dating apps as we are not exclusive we havenít had that chat so you are right I have to branch out even if itís just a date nothing sexual.

    I havenít contacted him since Saturday. As we was meant to meet but he cancelled. So I kinda left it at that. See if he would reach out to me. He hasnít as of yet.

    He rang me other day as I was upset about a accident and he was really worried. So I appreciated that.
    He travels around the country for his job so I donít get to see him much either. And that does suck to be honest.
    But I have always said oh well itís job. But effort when not working would be a little nicer. Seems like his loosing some kind of interest. And I donít like to be one those nagging girls always on the phone as Iím sure that would push him even more away.

    X x

  9. #18
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Does he have an alcohol problem? Why does he travel this much, what's his occupation? He sounds like more trouble than he's worth. It's good you're still looking around. Have you read this book? [Register to see the link]
    Originally Posted by michkath
    He has been moaning about Ď dry January Ď so perhaps could be another reason why his been so weird with me and kinda lost interest who knows. I donít know.

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Does he have an alcohol problem? Why does he travel this much, what's his occupation? He sounds like more trouble than he's worth. It's good you're still looking around. Have you read this book? [Register to see the link]
    Lmao!
    No he doesnít have a drinking problem where did you get from?

    Dry January means weíre both skint 😂 after Xmas. Doesnít mean drinking all the time Ď dry January Ď Can also mean dry wallets.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    That's odd. Is "broke" the definition for it where you are? What did he mean by it?

    "Dry January is a public health campaign urging people to abstain from alcohol for the month of January, particularly practised in the United Kingdom. It is generally accepted where the New Year starts mid-week the Dry January commences the following Monday, allowing for a debaucherous start to the year before abstinence.

    The campaign, as a formal entity, appears to be relatively recent, being described as having "sprung up in recent years" even in 2014. However, the Finnish government had launched a campaign called "Sober January" in 1942 as part of its war effort. The term "Dry January" was registered as a trademark by the charity Alcohol Concern in mid-2014; the first ever Dry January campaign by Alcohol Concern occurred in January 2013. In the leadup to the January 2015 campaign, for the first time Alcohol Concern partnered with Public Health England.

    In January 2014, according to Alcohol Concern, which initiated the campaign, over 17,000 Britons stopped drinking for that month. While there is controversy as to the efficacy and benefits of the practice, a 2014 survey by the University of Sussex found that six months following January 2014, out of 900 surveyed participants in the custom, 72% had "kept harmful drinking episodes down" and 4% were still not drinking."

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