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Thread: New GF I rarely see, what up?

  1. #11
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    Originally Posted by thisisrichey
    It is when somebody can say "finally she got the hint and quit her other job..."
    I had not seen her once in 2 weeks, she was working from 7am to 11pm. Prior to that I believe we had been on 3 dates, never once in an new relationship was I that low down the totem pole. She's just too busy for a relationship. I also just signed onto okcupid where I met her months ago and her profile popped up (that she said she deleted months ago) with what look like all new pics from her trip.

    Nice eh?

    Of course she denied it, but it showed she had been active in the past week.

    What a joke

  2. #12
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    I would say that she is too busy for the kind of relationship you want.

    You seem to require a lot of attention early and want things to be defined quickly—all good, no judgement.

    She sounds different, wanting things to develop slowly, and wanting very much to still live her life without it being immediately fused to another's. All good, no judgement.

    No need to demonize her to move on. Just move on, knowing your needs a bit clearer.

  3. #13
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    Originally Posted by bluecastle
    I would say that she is too busy for the kind of relationship you want.

    You seem to require a lot of attention early and want things to be defined quickly—all good, no judgement.

    She sounds different, wanting things to develop slowly, and wanting very much to still live her life without it being immediately fused to another's. All good, no judgement.

    No need to demonize her to move on. Just move on, knowing your needs a bit clearer.
    Great advice, thank you

  4. #14
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    How did she get 6 weeks off work?

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  6. #15
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    Originally Posted by DaisyMayPorter
    How did she get 6 weeks off work?
    Great question and it obviously took some leg work to get another 2-3 weeks off, none of which she told me about

  7. #16
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    Well if she was back on OK Cupid updating her photos then I'm sorry to say but I think it might not necessarily have been the jobs and that she was super busy but that she didn't take you that seriously and she was still dating other people. If she was really into you then why would she want to spend an extra two weeks on her trip when she'd already hardly seen you? If that was me I would not have taken off any extra time than needed if I liked the person because I'd be keen to get back to them. I definitely think you made the right decision to end it.

  8. #17
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    Originally Posted by Tinydance
    Well if she was back on OK Cupid updating her photos then I'm sorry to say but I think it might not necessarily have been the jobs and that she was super busy but that she didn't take you that seriously and she was still dating other people. If she was really into you then why would she want to spend an extra two weeks on her trip when she'd already hardly seen you? If that was me I would not have taken off any extra time than needed if I liked the person because I'd be keen to get back to them. I definitely think you made the right decision to end it.
    Probably but this may be a recurring theme for her which only gets worse so she keeps "relationships" quick release like this because she doesn't give them time and effort and the guys bail. I don't get why she didn't just break it off with me, I know she liked the sex, might have been that.

  9. #18
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    You already broke it off, but I will add to the conversation anyway. She's unavailable and busy doing her own thing. You can't fight her on a need to take a second job to pay the bills. BUT, now there's the issue around a lengthy trip that got extended, which seems odd to me that she can take 6 weeks off of work, and I suspect she doesn't really need the money if she can take a full six weeks off of work. At the end of the day, I question her priorities as it pertains to you...she's not interested or she just wants someone around when she's available. You could just accept whatever time you get, and don't get invested as a long-term thing, or you cut the cord and move on because she's not offering what you want in a relationship, which you have done. I think you made the right choice.

  10. #19
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    She was just looking for a reliable sex partner - a honey pot - but her life was kept secret, especially her need for attention - big wicked joke. All I wanted was a stable non needy /cling bomb chick and I ended up with her,

  11. #20
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    She's not available. And "non needy/clingy" is perhaps an overshoot and why you end up with stuff like her. If you want casual sex/fwb/casual dating, be upfront, but the downside is you'll keep getting women like her who are not available.
    Originally Posted by ManyDates
    All I wanted was a stable non needy /cling bomb chick and I ended up with her,

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