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Thread: BF obsessed with ex.

  1. #11
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    Originally Posted by LootieTootie
    This guy got no respect for you. Would he like it if it was you who was texting your ex about missing sex?

    You don't need google or us to tell you that this guy is not good for you. He doesn't deserve you.

    First off I am so sorry that you ever have to even go through something this devastating and painful. I truly am. I agree with this posters response. He isn't over her and she and him are probably just 4 texts away from taking this to the point of no return. You know I know you don't want to leave him, however, if he's talking to her like this..hes already gone past that point now. I hope you drop him and find another man after you heal who isn't still wanting the past to come into the present. I hate seeing posts like this. Makes me so sad for you. And her...she should know ..if he'll sneak text when he has you...he will do it to her to.

  2. #12
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    Red flag!!! As hard as it may be, Iíd break up with him. Itís intention of cheating, which crosses a line in my books.

  3. #13
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    Sorry to hear this. How long after they broke up did you start dating? What was the big rush moving in together when dating less than a year? You need to move out. He's in love with someone else.

    Sticking around knowing he loves and desires someone else makes no sense. If you bring it up he'll tell you what you want to hear so you continue paying half the bills and playing house. But keep in mind while you make his life easier and cheaper, he has more time to try to get her back.
    Originally Posted by Reyhoney
    My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year, we live together.
    Theyíve been texting for a few weeks and mostly about sex. All they did together and loved, all they miss. He tells her heís happy with me but she still lights up his fire like crazy. I havenít told him I know cause Iím so afraid of hearing what he has to say.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member Annia's Avatar
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    This is not acceptable at all. Even if he doesn't meet her in person, this is considered emotional cheating.

    Are you his rebound?

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  6. #15
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    It's grounds for dismissal in my books.

  7. #16
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    Wow! I didnít expect many replies. I was warned about possibly being his rebound but weíve been together for a year and things are very official. Also he told her heís happy with me? Doesnít that mean he wants her to know thereís no chance for them?

    Why do you think he loves her? I mean most of the texts were sexual except a few that I was confused about.

    Bouldering is mountain climbing inside. Sorry that was confusing.

  8. #17
    Platinum Member Annia's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Reyhoney
    Wow! I didnít expect many replies. I was warned about possibly being his rebound but weíve been together for a year and things are very official. Also he told her heís happy with me? Doesnít that mean he wants her to know thereís no chance for them?

    Why do you think he loves her? I mean most of the texts were sexual except a few that I was confused about.

    Bouldering is mountain climbing inside. Sorry that was confusing.
    It doesn't matter why. A man respectful man in a committed relationship wouldn't be opening to any flirting or whatever with an ex (or any woman). If he was 100% in this relationship with you, he'd have blocked and deleted her at the first signs of flirting from her.

    Even if he doesn't love her nor intends to have sex with her, he's leaving the door open for it and he's enjoying the sexual flirting and attention.

    Yes, he told her he's happy with you. So? He kept the flirting. He should've said "I'm happy with her please stop and respect my relationship" and block and delete her.

  9. #18
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    Originally Posted by Annia
    It doesn't matter why. A man respectful man in a committed relationship wouldn't be opening to any flirting or whatever with an ex (or any woman). If he was 100% in this relationship with you, he'd have blocked and deleted her at the first signs of flirting from her.

    Even if he doesn't love her nor intends to have sex with her, he's leaving the door open for it and he's enjoying the sexual flirting and attention.

    Yes, he told her he's happy with you. So? He kept the flirting. He should've said "I'm happy with her please stop and respect my relationship" and block and delete her.
    Youíre right. Iíve heard that from some of my exís before when Iíd even text or call to say something not remotely flirty even.

    Is there something missing in our relationship that a man would do this? I know nothing happened yet but if they were only a few minutes away from each other I bet there would have been. Heís extremely sexual and requires a very specific form of sex that he told her that she fit ALL of his needs in bed. That was harsh.

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by Reyhoney
    Youíre right. Iíve heard that from some of my exís before when Iíd even text or call to say something not remotely flirty even.

    Is there something missing in our relationship that a man would do this? I know nothing happened yet but if they were only a few minutes away from each other I bet there would have been. Heís extremely sexual and requires a very specific form of sex that he told her that she fit ALL of his needs in bed. That was harsh.
    Yes, you are missing a respectful man who is actually with you for the right reasons.

    We can't possibly tell you why he loves her. It doesn't matter, either. What matters is that he is nowhere near as into you as you are into him, and he still wants his ex. Him telling her he's happy with you is a joke; if he were so happy and if he were serious about you, he wouldn't be doing this. That doesn't mean you are doing anything wrong, just so we're clear. He's just full of hot air and will tell you (and her) what he thinks sounds good. Don't assume he's being sincere. His actions don''t line up with his words.

    Your relationship is not going to survive, girl. Time to kick him to the curb.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member Annia's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Reyhoney
    Youíre right. Iíve heard that from some of my exís before when Iíd even text or call to say something not remotely flirty even.

    Is there something missing in our relationship that a man would do this? I know nothing happened yet but if they were only a few minutes away from each other I bet there would have been. Heís extremely sexual and requires a very specific form of sex that he told her that she fit ALL of his needs in bed. That was harsh.
    Cheaters don't need reasons to cheat. It's not on the cheated person to adapt in bed, to change or whatever for someone who doesn't respect them enough to shut down flirting advances from other and to communicate properly with them.

    I would change the perspective of blaming yourself or thinking that he's like that because something is missing to actually holding him accountable for this huge disrespect.

    If there was something missing for him or whatever he should communicate that with you and not flirt with his ex. If he is so obsessed with her even if just sexually, he shouldn't be dating you.

    Aim higher and better for yourself.

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