jaqueline24 Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 Happy new year everyone. I wanted to come on here again and ask for advice on something that happened last night with my sister and her husband. They have a one year old daughter together (I love her very much) well it was cold last night and babies need to be in jackets or at least covered up right? Well last night my niece was being fussy at dinner and my sisters husband said maybe she needed fresh air and that she might have been feeling hot inside so he took her outside in the cold without her jacket. As soon as he went outside we all told my sister to go out there and put her jacket on, so my sister did and she came back inside with the jacket and said that her husband said no that their daughter doesn’t need it, that she is feeling hot inside and needed fresh air. My sister had this look on her face like if she was upset but of course she didn’t say anything. Is this controlling? I understand that Dad’s have a say and can do what they want with their baby but idk I feel like if your wife suggests something you should do it.. or am I wrong? My parents and I were just shocked at how it all went down. This isn’t the first time he’s taken her outside to get fresh air without a jacket. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 If it is a few minutes it is not a huge issue. It is like -20C or more? If it is like 0C a few mins is not a big deal. Link to comment
jaqueline24 Posted January 1, 2019 Author Share Posted January 1, 2019 It was about 40 degrees Fahrenheit and they were out there for about 5 minutes Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 No, not a big issue. That is not terribly cold at all . Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 That’s not a big deal. Dads should not listen to everything a mom says. They are BOTH parents and both have say. Link to comment
jaqueline24 Posted January 1, 2019 Author Share Posted January 1, 2019 Thanks!! My family overreacts when it comes to going out without a jacket Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 That is not cold and five minutes is perfectly fine . Maybe if it was an hour I’d be a little excited or if it was like -20 or something . That was absolutely nothing . Link to comment
katrina1980 Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 What happened when they were back in the house, did she stop being fussy? I am wondering what's truly troubling your sister, that he didn't do as she asked, or was she concerned about her daughter? Five minutes in 40 degrees is not a huge deal, especially if it was very hot in the house. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 Unfortunately, you'll have to keep quiet and just be a good listener for your sister if she brings it it. Other than that, be the best aunt you can be. How does the child react? Maybe give your sister/niece a nice blanket for outdoor breaks. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 Even little kids can become overheated . Link to comment
jaqueline24 Posted January 1, 2019 Author Share Posted January 1, 2019 Yes she stopped being fussy! And I think it was just because my parents were giving her a hard time for not “making” him put a jacket on her but I’m not sure. Idk if I should ask?.. and okay thanks! It was warm in the house Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 4C doesn’t demand a coat for 5 mins. She was fine. Link to comment
jaqueline24 Posted January 1, 2019 Author Share Posted January 1, 2019 My niece was fine when she came back inside and it was kind of awkward but they all moved on from it (Except me lol which is why I’m on here) and Okay thank you Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 Being outside for 5 minutes in the cold is not a massive deal, imo. Also, depends on what exactly she was wearing. If she only had a t-shirt, diaper/nappy and no socks etc well yes, that is a huge issue, but I can't imagine she was dressed like that. What was she wearing? Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 Here in Canada at 4 C some people here are still wearing shorts and flip-flops . Lol Link to comment
jaqueline24 Posted January 1, 2019 Author Share Posted January 1, 2019 She was in a onesie with pants on and socks on Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 She was in a onesie with pants on and socks on oh, she'll be fine! Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 She was in a onesie with pants on and socks on She was ok. Just keep the house a nice even temperature . 69/70. People won’t get overheated . Link to comment
j.man Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 I feel like if your wife suggests something you should do it.. or am I wrong?Oh man, that's a good one. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 Oh man, that's a good one. I agree. Men are very competent caregivers. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 Oh man, that's a good one. I agree. As much as I feel like pulling the Mom Card now and then I know that I shouldn't. Exceptions are if the mother does a particular routine that the father never does, he should defer -but also vice versa. It's not gender based as much as common sense although on a practical level when I was home full time for 7 years I certainly knew more about certain aspects of our child's routine. Typically not an issue as he deferred - it made sense to do so. Link to comment
purplepaisley Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 The baby was fussy and dad suspected it was because she was feeling hot. I suspect dad was also feeling really hot since this was his immediate solution to the issue at hand. I suspect dad was also feeling rather moody in his hot discomfort and rather than fussing and whining and tantruming, because he's an adult after all, he saw an opportunity to excuse himself, cool off, and get the baby calmed down as well. This leaves mom to enjoy her family and remove the fussy toddler, so the family could relax and enjoy each other. Tell me about your house, OP. Do your parents keep the temperature hot and toasty? Guests who don't keep the house temperature that high are going to feel very uncomfortable unless they know in advance to dress in layers and strip down accordingly. Even then, they may need to seek a chill on the porch or sit by a window. Perhaps your parents can turn the temperature down a couple notches when they are hosting and make use of an extra sweater so that guests don't melt. The baby was fine and a few minutes at 40 degrees is nothing. With babies, we tend to use ourselves to gauge issues with these young sprouts who cannot voice themselves, and dad was very likely feeling like he might just combust from the heat, and the baby was fussy, so let's put two and two together, assume the baby was roasting, and take a chill. He's too polite to tell your parents your house is an oven, and his wife, your sister, their daughter, isn't opening up her mouth either...it's not her house...but maybe this is a cue to your parents to pay attention to the temperature. With cooking and extra people in the house, the temperature probably increased a little, and they could maybe keep the thermostat a degree or two lower? They can always turn it up, but start low. If I were going to bring anything up with my sister, it would be whether or not the house was a raging inferno. Link to comment
SherrySher Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 It was about 40 degrees Fahrenheit and they were out there for about 5 minutes In my opinion, no biggie. My grandma used to put us out on an enclosed balcony when we were babies in the middle of winter. She had a belief that cold fresh air was good for the lungs. We spent way more time out there then 5 minutes and me, nor my cousins suffered from it. He took the little one out there for 5 minutes? She should be fine. Link to comment
maew Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 People don't realize that babies are for all intents and purposes human just like we are, and get hot the same way we do. Granted they do lose heat more quickly from their little bodies but a few minutes in 4c weather is nothing! I go out without a coat on all the time (I live in Canada) unless it's minus 0c or below. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 People don't realize that babies are for all intents and purposes human just like we are, and get hot the same way we do. Granted they do lose heat more quickly from their little bodies but a few minutes in 4c weather is nothing! I go out without a coat on all the time (I live in Canada) unless it's minus 0c or below. The same for me. I live in Canada as well and sometimes I go out without a coat when it’s even lower than that . And in fact to have proper tightness in a car seat a child should not be wearing a coat . They should be wearing some layers and then their car seat covered with a blanket . Newborns can’t regulate their own body temperature but by one you certainly can . If a one-year-old is cold they will start to shiver and complain just like she complained about being too hot . You certainly don’t need to have it for it to be an inferno in house for a toddler . They don’t even recommend for you to cover your toddlers and infants with blankets in their crib . I’ve looked after kids professionally and otherwise for more than 20 years . I also own my own daycare . I have looked after children for CAS and raised my own child. Link to comment
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