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Thread: Ex agrees to meet

  1. #11
    It was her idea. But you're right 100% right

  2. #12
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    Originally Posted by Muskyhunter9
    It was her idea. But you're right 100% right
    "and I then said "I'm sorry, the way I processed things only made me feel what I wanted out of the relationship, not you. I know what I want and need to do now regardless of what happens. Hopes aren't high but I'd like to meet next weekend."

    According to your original post (quoted above), you suggested meeting up. Now it was her idea?

    She sounds lukewarm. She waited a day to respond because it isn't on her mind the way it is yours.

    If you keep pushing you will succeed in pushing her away permanently. Respect her wishes for you to stop smothering her.

  3. #13
    No, her idea to wait two weeks after the breakup

  4. #14
    Platinum Member mustlovedogs's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Muskyhunter9
    No, her idea to wait two weeks after the breakup
    But you reached out to hold her to it.

  5.  

  6. #15
    Yeah I did.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member mustlovedogs's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Muskyhunter9
    Yeah I did.
    So... it was your idea.

    You’re initiating.

    You’re reaching out.

  8. #17
    I guess what I meant was it was her idea to give it some time after the break up. But yes I did break and reach out to her.

  9. #18
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    Forget all these BS games.. send her a short text saying “I care about you and I’d like to try to work things out, if you change your mind I hope you’ll reach out.” Then try to forget about her and live your life. Nothing positive will come from actively trying to get her back.

  10. #19
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    So am I the only one picking up on the fact that the OPer clearly has some sort of anxiety disorder?

    Im asking because telling someone with an anxiety disorder to 'forget about her' or that he needs to appear higher value will simply not get through.

    His girlfriend told him in no uncertain terms he was smothering her and he clung tighter, RED FLAG, his attachment to her isnt 'normal' so advice given under 'normal' circumstances just isnt gonna get through.

    OPer what is going through your head right now? Do you believe you are capable of giving her space, actual space, not just silence for a few hours? Why do you believe she feels you are smothering her?

  11. #20
    Ding ding. Yes I have horrible anxiety! I mean yeah I'm capable of doing it, if I would've just blocked her on social media right away I probably wouldn't have reached out. But a week after we broke up I saw she finally switched her status to single and it freaked me out, and until then I was doing okay, not great, but definitely better than how I've handled break ups in the past. I believe it was because I've been working 64-70 hour weeks the last month and my anxiety has been through the roof. I may have vented a little too much and freaked her out. Even then she said she would be patient with me. My last relationship ended because I got into a funk from working too much and I was freaking myself out again. There were sometimes that I got bummed, like when she said she applied for a job up north but told me she had no plans of ending things with me and if it were to come down to it she wanted me to come with her. I too want to move up north and we previously talked about it. But it still freaked me out. A couple times she made plans to do Christmas shopping and I tried to tag along (which I apologized for). After the last 8 hours I have no desire to text her and I'll wait and see what happens. But my mind is racing. She was never too up front with how she felt and told me in the beginning of the relationship she doesn't show emotion and talk about things alot. Which I do. I'm at work now and I'm good with my mind distracted, but at home it kills me.

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