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Apologize or ignore a PSYCHO?


Nebraskagirl14

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Hi all-

 

I will keep this short. A couple of years ago, my uncle posted a picture on Facebook with a hunter having killed a deer and posing with it. Me being the huge animal lover I am, and also having a big mouth at times, made a snarky comment about people that kill animals having tiny private parts. It turned out that that picture was of a recently deceased super distant relative and once I realized that, I apologized and deleted my comment. Last night, I responded to something political my uncle posted on FB and this guy (the deceased guy’s brother) went OFF. He wrote like 10 posts in a row on that thread calling me a f******* c***, a b****, he wants to choke me, he wants to teach me a lesson, I’m a disgusting p***** eating homosexual... I mean, it went on and on and on in ways that I literally have never in my life experienced. My mom (this guy’s cousin) was sick over it. My aunt too. My mom reminded him that I apologized for not having a clue that that was his brother and that I was referencing that act of hunting rather than his brother specifically, but he wouldn’t listen. I would have said sorry to him since I didn’t two years ago but he just kept cussing and saying disgusting things to me and literally threatening my safety. He said he hopes I get AIDS. I mean, serious psycho things. I never did say anything and I do think that was a good move because he was clearly never going to listen but at the same time, I am very sorry for what I said and I would have said that had he stopped saying every vulgar thing he could think of. He clearly knows I’m gay and he hates gay people. He hates that I’m a liberal. He hates that I’m a woman I’m sure. His words were jarring but don’t bother me. It’s the threats that bother me. Any advice you might have to diffuse this situation besides just let it go? I don’t want it to keep invading my energy but it was really shocking. His lives in another state thank god but he is absolutely mentally unstable.

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Try to reset your privacy settings and do not engage these people. Sift through your social media and reset all of it, including cleaning out people who are vexing, combative, etc. Why waste time on flame wars? Find causes and subjects that interest you and join civilized discussion groups.

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Try to reset your privacy settings and do not engage these people. Sift through your social media and reset all of it, including cleaning out people who are vexing, combative, etc. Why waste time on flame wars? Find causes and subjects that interest you and join civilized discussion groups.

 

Wiseman, I was hoping you would respond! :-) Yeah, thanks for that. I agree. I actually legitimately wanted to tell him I was sorry for what I said two years ago but I had no idea he even saw it and was carrying around all of this hatred for me. And I would have responded and said that had he not said all of that stuff. Yeah, I will redirect my focus. Thank you!

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No, he shouldn't be going off on you like that, but I'm guessing that, in addition to insulting him with your hunting post, you possibly also insulted him (indirectly) with your political comment?

 

Stop with all the social media comments and opinions. Share your vacation pics, your pics of your pie you just made. But just stop all the opinion-based posts. Or remove social media altogether.

 

As for this particular person, block him, as his comments have absolutely gone over the line. However, I must say, I do believe he's been infuriated and is responding. Best to block each other and move on.

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Yeah, my Facebook feed gets smaller every day, with the amount of people I've hidden/unfriended/blocked.

 

The only political opinion I care about is my own.

The only religious opinion I care about is my own.

 

Make me laugh, post heartfelt memes, show me what your family looks like today, post memories of H.S. But the second someone posts an opinion, they're out.

 

You don't have to delete it altogether. Just temper down the opinions, and your responses to others' opinions. You'll be amazed at how much happier you'll be. :D

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Yeah, my Facebook feed gets smaller every day, with the amount of people I've hidden/unfriended/blocked.

 

The only political opinion I care about is my own.

The only religious opinion I care about is my own.

 

Make me laugh, post heartfelt memes, show me what your family looks like today, post memories of H.S. But the second someone posts an opinion, they're out.

 

You don't have to delete it altogether. Just temper down the opinions, and your responses to others' opinions. You'll be amazed at how much happier you'll be. :D

 

Agreed totally.

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It's not necessary to post a comment. YOU chose to do that.

 

Now, I agree, this person's reactions were way, way out of line. But none of us HAS to comment on anything!

 

If I see something I disagree with I shrug and go on with my day. I accept that others have different beliefs, opinions and hobbies.

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I started it??? I didn’t post anything political. My uncle did and then he wrote something and then I wrote something. That’s how Facebook works you know.

 

Uh, yeah, you started it. You chose to comment and start a fight twice.

 

The first comment was making fun of a dead guys you-know-what.

 

The second - well, you’re not answering, I suspect it was just as rude.

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Uh, yeah, you started it. You chose to comment and start a fight twice.

 

The first comment was making fun of a dead guys you-know-what.

 

The second - well, you’re not answering, I suspect it was just as rude.

 

Well, aren’t you such a nice person. You don’t even know me so it’s probably safe to not make assumptions. And if you actually read my original post, you would know that it wasn’t a picture that was obvious as to who it was nor did I know he was dead. I apologized when it happened. Have you never said something stupid and had to apologize because from your judgmental responses, I’m guessing you are perfect.

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It's not necessary to post a comment. YOU chose to do that.

 

Now, I agree, this person's reactions were way, way out of line. But none of us HAS to comment on anything!

 

If I see something I disagree with I shrug and go on with my day. I accept that others have different beliefs, opinions and hobbies.

 

It’s true. I didn’t have to. Facebook is a place where people have different beliefs. My uncle is liberal. This guy is not. He said my uncle was childish for continuing to post about DT. I asked why we should have to stop talking about it just because he was elected two years ago. People continue to be upset about it. That was it.

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Well, aren’t you such a nice person. You don’t even know me so it’s probably safe to not make assumptions. And if you actually read my original post, you would know that it wasn’t a picture that was obvious as to who it was nor did I know he was dead. I apologized when it happened. Have you never said something stupid and had to apologize because from your judgmental responses, I’m guessing you are perfect.

 

I did read your original post.

 

What did I say that was wrong?

 

Not knowing the context does not make what you did any nicer.

 

I don’t post crap like that on Facebook because it’s petty.

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It’s true. I didn’t have to. Facebook is a place where people have different beliefs. My uncle is liberal. This guy is not. He said my uncle was childish for continuing to post about DT. I asked why we should have to stop talking about it just because he was elected two years ago. People continue to be upset about it. That was it.

 

Thing is, people are not going to read your comments and think "You know, she's RIGHT! I am going to change my entire mindset on this topic based on this Facebook comment!"

 

And yeah, you have the "right" to post whatever you want. First Amendment and all that. BUT, you do need to realize people have the same right to react to what you post and you aren't always going to like how they react.

 

Yes, that man was way out of line. No doubt. But when we post on social media we open ourselves up to any and all reactions. And we have to expect that.

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Thing is, people are not going to read your comments and think "You know, she's RIGHT! I am going to change my entire mindset on this topic based on this Facebook comment!"

 

And yeah, you have the "right" to post whatever you want. First Amendment and all that. BUT, you do need to realize people have the same right to react to what you post and you aren't always going to like how they react.

 

Yes, that man was way out of line. No doubt. But when we post on social media we open ourselves up to any and all reactions. And we have to expect that.

 

You’re right. Totally. And I should have known better. For the most part, I don’t at all argue with people on Facebook anymore because it’s a waste of everything. I wish I had said nothing and just let my uncle go back and forth with him. I guess I was looking for a way to apologize for what I mistakenly said two years ago and I just don’t know that there’s any good way to do that at this point. I mean, He threatened to physically harm me on multiple occasions last night.

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You’re right. Totally. And I should have known better. For the most part, I don’t at all argue with people on Facebook anymore because it’s a waste of everything. I wish I had said nothing and just let my uncle go back and forth with him. I guess I was looking for a way to apologize for what I mistakenly said two years ago and I just don’t know that there’s any good way to do that at this point. I mean, He threatened to physically harm me on multiple occasions last night.

 

serious question, why do you feel you need to apologize?

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I guess just because I’m not the kind of person to say something really mean and that isn’t who I want to be...

 

Disagree when someone says something you dont like you have no issue clapping back:

 

Well, aren’t you such a nice person. You don’t even know me so it’s probably safe to not make assumptions. And if you actually read my original post, you would know that it wasn’t a picture that was obvious as to who it was nor did I know he was dead. I apologized when it happened. Have you never said something stupid and had to apologize because from your judgmental responses, I’m guessing you are perfect.

 

What is it about a random person who has shown he takes online arguments a bit too far so important that you felt the need to post.

 

Please elaborate.

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Disagree when someone says something you dont like you have no issue clapping back:

 

 

 

What is it about a random person who has shown he takes online arguments a bit too far so important that you felt the need to post.

 

Please elaborate.

 

Well, his comments were jarring to me and I don’t know his mental state and so I was really feeling like he might try to harm me and so I wanted to post to see if I ought to try to apologize to diffuse the situation or just leave it alone.

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I hope you're a vegetarian yourself or that you're equally calling out your meat eating friends on their microscopic genetalia for your or their money going to traumatizing animals by raising them in confinement and coralling them into a strange place to be killed and butchered. And if you're a milk drinker, don't get me started on the veal industry you'd be supporting. Unless folks are getting their meat from an animal that was literally shot in the back of the head drinking from Its own water trough on its home ranch, I can guarantee the deer lived and died far more humanely than what your consumption perpetuates.

 

And I'm someone who simply doesn't like hunters trophy posing. But while we're all hypocrites to some degree, it's always best to check how many windows you've got around you before throwing stones at someone else.

 

Regardless, the guy is obviously unhinged even if not an immediate physical threat. I wouldn't apologize as I doubt anything would alleviate whatever offense he took from your strange compulsion to comment on his dead brother's penis. I personally can't say I've had any urge to pejoratively refer to a woman having a floppy labia for having an opinion I don't like, but I suppose you do you.

 

Just block the guy. He won't be able to see your posts and you can pick whatever menial battles you'd like on Facebook without worry.

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I hope you're a vegetarian yourself or that you're equally calling out your meat eating friends on their microscopic genetalia for your or their money going to traumatizing animals by raising them in confinement and coralling them into a strange place to be killed and butchered. And if you're a milk drinker, don't get me started on the veal industry you'd be supporting. Unless folks are getting their meat from an animal that was literally shot in the back of the head drinking from Its own water trough on its home ranch, I can guarantee the deer lived and died far more humanely than what your consumption perpetuates.

 

And I'm someone who simply doesn't like hunters trophy posing. But while we're all hypocrites to some degree, it's always best to check how many windows you've got around you before throwing stones at someone else.

 

Regardless, the guy is obviously unhinged even if not an immediate physical threat. I wouldn't apologize as I doubt anything would alleviate whatever offense he took from your strange compulsion to comment on his dead brother's penis. I personally can't say I've had any urge to pejoratively refer to a woman having a floppy labia for having an opinion I don't like, but I suppose you do you.

 

Just block the guy. He won't be able to see your posts and you can pick whatever menial battles you'd like on Facebook without worry.

 

I don’t eat or use any animal products and they ARE trophy hunters. I don’t give people a hard time for eating meat even though I’m against it personally and the industry is unconscionable but trophy hunting is disgusting. Even so, I should have kept my mouth shut. The genitalia reference was a metaphor. As for your other comments, thank you.

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The guy is a nut job.

 

I also believe it is better to stay away from making political comments or statements that can be deemed controversial. Keep it fun and light, or some are going to respond as this guy.

 

Do not apologize, it won't make a difference. He threatened your safety and called you some offensive names. Awful.

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The guy is a nut job.

 

I also believe it is better to stay away from making political comments or statements that can be deemed controversial. Keep it fun and light, or some are going to respond as this guy.

 

Do not apologize, it won't make a difference. He threatened your safety and called you some offensive names. Awful.

 

Holly, I can’t agree more. I am going to learn from all of this big time. Thanks!

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