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Thread: Too much to ask?

  1. #21
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by shineyboot
    Yes I liked him but he was pathetic.
    I'd strongly discourage you from falling into the habit of needing to bitterly regard men lowly in order to cope with them not being interested in you. While purely anecdotal, I've never met a woman who was like that and who wasn't perpetually single or in unhappy relationships with lower quality men who will tolerate them.

    This guy didn't need a rhyme or reason to not be into you, just as you didn't and don't to stop seeing him. A guy can be a perfectly decent guy while not wanting to progressively date you or respond to overly dramatic non-relationship breakup texts. And I can tell you as a guy who's been there and done that with women who send texts like your initial one (and the pretty much identical twin that was your second), there is no correct answer other than, "Sorry. I'm a big jerk. Let me make it up to you."

    I have zero doubt had he said, "OK, best of luck to you," you'd have hit right back with, "w0w that's all you have to say?" or "I guess you really are like all the others" or at the very least wouldn't be here complaining about it all the same. Sometimes it's better for guys (and gals, for that matter) to spare themselves the further drama that's pending their response. Try not to assume the worst of people should they not fall in with your expectations.

    I hope you'll take advantage of the fresh start coming this new year and evaluate your perspectives and expectations of dating. And while I don't at all think you're a basket case, if your benefits package includes counseling of some sort, it might be worth booking a session or two just to have someone point you to the right path.

  2. #22
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by milly007
    Not sure what you mean, FIO?

    Please clarify
    Nevermind. I misspoke.
    Last edited by figureitout23; 12-29-2018 at 07:14 PM.

  3. #23
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    Deleted...

  4. #24
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Please see edited response.

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  6. #25
    Platinum Member maew's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by shineyboot
    Yes I liked him but he was pathetic.
    No he wasn't... he was simply dis-engaging from you and going no contact after you broke it off with him to avoid further drama. Something we advise people to do all the time on here.

  7. #26
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    I may be wrong... but I think you were kind of hoping that he might protest? Say something along the lines of “no, I WAS interested, i just got really busy” or something like that?

    Unfortunately, people rarely respond the way that we want them to.

    The flakiness, unfortunately, was because he lost interest. Since he lost romantic interest, I agree with the others in that there was no good response to your text. It was basically breaking up with him again a 2nd time. I agree that his silence was appropriate.

    I think you should refocus on other men. Try online dating! Find someone who wants to put as much effort in as you do. They are out there... just have to find them! (... and that’s half the fun sometimes!)

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