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Hypochondria after having a child


BecxyRex

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Hi everyone,

 

I’m not sure what I’m realky asking.. I suppose I’m looking for people who can understand or have had similar experiences.

 

Since having my daughter, who’s 20 months old, I feel myself being hyper aware of my own mortality and maybe developing a bit of a case of hypochondria. I’m looking into finding a professional to dig deeper with me, but for the time being, I’m just going to see if anyone here has had similar experiences.

 

My father died in a car crash when I was a child. It was completely unexpected and left me with a heightened fear of losing loved ones, but was never a major hinderance in my life. I wouldn’t say it is now, but I’m catching myself feeling a bit anxious when my fiancé rides his bike home from work at night. This isn’t something I’m burdening him with, but I feel a little weight dropping when he comes through the door at night. It’s the same with me having unexplained health issues that by no means are serious and would probably leave anyone else unphazed. For example, I’ve had a few days in a row of headaches that would start as soon as I woke up and I immediately thought the worst and went to a doctor. Everything is fine and they have since stopped. I’ve had my blood checked for any vitamin deficiencies and whatnot and it all came back perfectly. I feel a bit silly afterwards, like I worried for no reason and I should’ve just waited a few more days.

 

This has really started when I had my daughter and my only guess is that I’m afraid of not being there for her, or having something happen to me like it did with my dad. It’s oddly not an issue when I’m driving or riding the bike into work in the morning. I love driving and don’t even think about accidents. It’s only about my health. Maybe because it’s more out of my control? I don’t know...

 

I don’t want this to sound worse than it is. This isn’t impacting my relationships or the way I am with my daughter. It’s simply something I’ve noticed creeping up once in a while and I’m wondering if anyone has had this happen.

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You're going to die.

That will be $1500 dollars please.

 

Now that you know, live today! Smile, love and laugh.

Today, use and enjoy the gifts you've been given.

 

Take reasonable care of yourself but don't waste time searching for imperfections.

Mute all tv commercials.

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Hi Wiseman, I had the baby blues a few months after my daughter was born and went to get evaluated. No depression and not anything excersise and diet couldnt fix. I feel great now and have been for a while. I’m happy and all I just get a fear of my daughter losing her dad or me once in a while. Thanks for your input!

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You're going to die.

That will be $1500 dollars please.

 

Now that you know, live today! Smile, love and laugh.

Today, use and enjoy the gifts you've been given.

 

Take reasonable care of yourself but don't waste time searching for imperfections.

Mute all tv commercials.

 

I know, I know! :) I love my life, try to live it to the fullest. Just those fears creep up once in a while, but I suppose it helps to see it as simply as this sometimes. Thanks!

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I do understand about not wanting to die while your child is a child, or even older. I have 2 grown kids, so I get that. But you seem bothered by this and I think it would be prudent to talk to your doctor or a therapist and work thru this so it doesnt impede your life later on.

 

Definitely. Just talking to a therapist will help I'm sure. Maybe my childhood experience is catching up with me now that I have one on my own and it's a good time to work through anything unresolved.

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I had that tendency but about my child not me and became much more of a germophobe. I also worried a lot more about my husband -who is fond of eating old leftovers - getting sick and then I'd be solo parenting a newborn and I was sleep deprived, etc (I know, sounds cold that I didn't mention not wanting him to feel sick but he takes the risk with the old leftovers and so far so good). I think a lot of things like that get heightened after having a child especially since you likely are sleep deprived so everything looms larger. Yes I would speak with a counselor. One of my friends is a hypochondriac and had to work really hard not to subect her child to it. Good luck!

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Definitely. Just talking to a therapist will help I'm sure. Maybe my childhood experience is catching up with me now that I have one on my own and it's a good time to work through anything unresolved.

 

Glad you're open minded about hiring professional help. People have no problem hiring trades for practical stuff like plumbing, car repair, tax prep, etc., but what could be more practical than your quality of life and mental health?

 

I'd also suggest contacting your local hospital for a referral to some kind of meditation training or group. This can help you to learn how to 'unplug' from anxiety and shift your focus into habits that can de-stress you at will. Once you learn various methods and find ones you like to practice regularly, you can tap into those when you really need them.

 

If you needed to flee a threatening situation quickly, and there was a bicycle right there, but you never learned how to ride a bike, that would be a bummer. Same is true of relaxation and meditative techniques. Learn a bunch, then pick your 'go to' practices that help you the most, and practice those until you can do them mentally on the spot whenever you need to reach for them.

 

Head high, and you'll thank yourself later.

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