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Thread: Update- mistake I made with guy

  1. #1
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    Update- mistake I made with guy

    Always follow your gut. It went from bad to worse to a disaster! I ended up dating him exclusively and for two weekends it went well. Now it has spiraled downhill! First, I find out he married someone for money but they are separated not divorced. Then, he calls me and is plastered at 7:30 pm on a weeknight. And on top of it, heís acting disrespectful. He called me the orher night for over an hour, but on average he doesnít call nearly enough and most of my calls get ignored and texts he will take his time responding half the time. He wonít make plans more than a day before and we never even go out! I donít feel like he cares and just using this relationship to his advantage. #alwaystrustyourgut

  2. #2
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Why are you with this guy who doesnt give a rat's ass about you? He's made it pretty clear he's got no respect or interest in you. Time to move on.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Now is the time to set yourself free and dump this clown. Why bother hooking up with a jerk? End it then delete and block him so you can move forward to date decent guys.
    Originally Posted by Gymgirl71
    -he married someone for money but they are separated not divorced.
    -he calls me and is plastered
    -heís acting disrespectful.
    -He wonít make plans more than a day before and we never even go out

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    What do you get out of this, other than being treated like garbage? Why do you settle for so little?

    He does not respect or care about you! And, he is married.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    OP....do you know what dating actually is? It's a time period where you sit back and observe the other person - how they act, how they treat you, what they reveal about their character and personality to you and does that actually work for you, their views and attitudes about everything from work to religion to lifestyle. It's YOUR time to get to know them and see IF this person is worth seeing again.

    What you want to do is completely eliminate the get to know you process and jump into an instant relationship. You want to be his rock and exclusive after two dates? That's not even sane. I'm sorry but it just isn't. You are also making demands on him as if you've been in a relationship for years. It doesn't work like that.

    OP, no sane guy will EVER ask you to be exclusive after just a few dates, let alone two. On top of that this guy is MARRIED and cheating on his wife. You don't actually know that he is separated and I don't know why you are surprised that this is all blowing up in your face, that you are being brushed off and son on. You do realize that cheating is not that simple, right? He can't exactly call you and answer your calls or texts or show up for coffee whenever. He kind of has more important obligations, including making sure his wife doesn't discover his extracurricular activities.

    This guy is a complete stranger to you, you don't even know what all he is lying about and how far he will go with that, yet you want to be treated like you are already married, made a priority in his life, have an instant relationship. How lonely and desperate are you really? The way you are going about dating, honestly, you are pretty much ensuring that you don't get the relationship that you crave so much. Please get some help via counseling to get your head screwed on straight, figure out how dating actually works and how to engage in dating and relationships in a healthy way. Your issues truly are being the help of these boards.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    On the phone for an hour? Why? I'd just stop taking his calls.

  8. #7
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    Originally Posted by melancholy123
    Why are you with this guy who doesnt give a rat's ass about you? He's made it pretty clear he's got no respect or interest in you. Time to move on.
    its true. Iím texting him to end things then Iím blocking him. Heís a creep

  9. #8
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by dancingfool
    op....do you know what dating actually is? It's a time period where you sit back and observe the other person - how they act, how they treat you, what they reveal about their character and personality to you and does that actually work for you, their views and attitudes about everything from work to religion to lifestyle. It's your time to get to know them and see if this person is worth seeing again.

    What you want to do is completely eliminate the get to know you process and jump into an instant relationship. You want to be his rock and exclusive after two dates? That's not even sane. I'm sorry but it just isn't. You are also making demands on him as if you've been in a relationship for years. It doesn't work like that.

    Op, no sane guy will ever ask you to be exclusive after just a few dates, let alone two. On top of that this guy is married and cheating on his wife. You don't actually know that he is separated and i don't know why you are surprised that this is all blowing up in your face, that you are being brushed off and son on. You do realize that cheating is not that simple, right? He can't exactly call you and answer your calls or texts or show up for coffee whenever. He kind of has more important obligations, including making sure his wife doesn't discover his extracurricular activities.

    This guy is a complete stranger to you, you don't even know what all he is lying about and how far he will go with that, yet you want to be treated like you are already married, made a priority in his life, have an instant relationship. How lonely and desperate are you really? The way you are going about dating, honestly, you are pretty much ensuring that you don't get the relationship that you crave so much. Please get some help via counseling to get your head screwed on straight, figure out how dating actually works and how to engage in dating and relationships in a healthy way. Your issues truly are being the help of these boards.

    this ^^^^^^

  10. #9
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Gymgirl71
    its true. Iím texting him to end things then Iím blocking him. Heís a creep
    I hope you do. Honestly I would not bother to text him to say it's over. I'd just delete and block.

  11. #10
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    Originally Posted by melancholy123
    I hope you do. Honestly I would not bother to text him to say it's over. I'd just delete and block.
    i deleted already, just need to block

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