Not sure what to do. Maybe someone here knows?

I had a knot in my throat because I unknowingly drank caffeine in some tea before bed. My boyfriend was thinking all night that I was mad at him because of my energy, but every time I tried to tell him I wasn’t mad, he would tell me that he was 100% sure I was mad, and he would pout and pout and look so sad.

Every time I looked at him he would stop what he was doing and apologize acting like he was very annoyed and upset, even though I was literally just looking at him without judgment. Sometimes I’m even looking at him with love when he ends up stopping what he’s doing, apologizing in an angry manner.

For hours it could go on in this pattern: he rolls over, watches a movie on his laptop, etc.. then I look at him, he apologizes, I ask him why, he says he doesn’t know. I’m not even sure what to do.. because no matter what I say or how I act he won’t believe me when I tell him I’m not mad.

He also talks about himself as if he’s a horrible person, but the only thing that makes him nearly intolerable at times is the negative way he talks about himself, not because of anything he’s doing that is inherently wrong. He also lies and calls it joking. For example: telling me he took a bunch of pills (which scares me obviously) then saying he actually only took the recommended dose and he’s fine.

Besides all of this we have amazing days, I’m in love with him most of the time. Some days we hit it off so well, he’s positive and confident and silly.

I love him when he’s like this, and I love him when he’s not too... but I’m just trying to figure out if these are things that can be fixed with time (and counseling since we just started couples counseling) or if this is something he needs to figure out on his own.

I love him but I don’t want to hurt myself trying to fix someone who can’t be fixed. What should I do? Any help would be greatly appreciated.

I had a knot in my throat because I unknowingly drank caffeine in some tea before bed. My boyfriend was thinking all night that I was mad at him because of my energy,

Not sure if I understand this correctly, but ....... your boyfriend thought you were mad at him because you drank caffeine before bed??

He sounds like a manipulative jerk. This isn't about tea. What kind of pills was he "joking about"? He seems like the type who wants the center of attention at all times and will use any kind of almost abusive drama to get it. End it. You can't change or fix anyone. Why are you in couples counseling? That won't fix being a jerk.

-he would tell me that he was 100% sure I was mad, and he would pout and pout and look so sad.

-he ends up stopping what he’s doing, apologizing in an angry manner.

He also lies and calls it joking. For example: telling me he took a bunch of pills (which scares me obviously) then saying he actually only took the recommended dose and he’s fine.

don’t want to hurt myself trying to fix someone who can’t be fixed.

He sounds like a manipulative jerk. This isn't about tea. What kind of pills was he "joking about"? He seems like the type who wants the center of attention at all times and will use any kind of almost abusive drama to get it. End it. You can't change or fix anyone. Why are you in couples counseling? That won't fix being a jerk.

I agree this has nothing to do with tea and caffeine. Your bf sounds like a jerk.

It sounds like depression. A lot of people who are depressed don't think they're good enough to have a girlfriend and put themselves down. But it could also be emotional abuse. Was he trying to make you crazy on purpose? Is he always like this?

Does he also suffer from insomnia? Why was he up all night watching movies on his laptop? What kind of pills did he take? Does he have psychological issues?

I think the problem is with your boyfriend and not you drinking caffeine. If you want to talk about what hes doing, feel free to discuss it here.