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Thread: should i tell him the truth?

  1. #1

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    should i tell him the truth?

    about a week ago my friend and i decided it would be fun to download tinder. it wasnít supposed to be anything serious, we just wanted to write with some new people, HOW WRONG WAS I. one boy wrote to me and from the beginning it was really fun, we understood each other really well so i decided to give him my snapchat and after some time my fb, we write on there now. i never thought that i would meet someone so amazing. he is understanding, caring, i feel like i can tell him everything and he will listen patiently, not to mention extremly good looking and even though we donít know each other that long i really trust him. he lives about an hour away and weíre planning to meet in person but there is one problem: heís 17 (18 in march) and i told him iím 16 even though iíll be 15 in january... i donít know how to tell him the truth because i donít want him to think iím not completely honest with him about other things. i told him iím 16 when we first started talking because i thought that this would be just another random dude i would forget in an hour but that never happened.
    iím scared that if i tell him the truth we will stop talking but if something real is supposed to come out of this i want to be 100% honest with him. what should i do? i really care about him and i donít want to loose him (the legal age of consent is 15 in poland and we live there btw)

  2. #2
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    OMG you are jail bait. You MUST tell him the truth. If you do meet up with him he could end up charged with statutory rape. Think about how devastating that would be for both of you. You should NEVER lie to someone about your age.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Eh, hes not 18. These are two minors communicating.

    Just tell him the truth.

  4. #4
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    You need to be honest with him, OP. As pointed out above, he could potentially land in legal hot water if you meet when he's 18 and you're still a minor. Don't put him in that position by not disclosing your real age.

    As for whether he'll want to keep talking to you, that's the unfortunate risk you took when you lied about your age. He might not, and you will need to accept that. Until then, I would advise you to please still keep your feet on the ground about him (or anyone else you've never met.) You don't know him well enough to trust him. Chatting through FB or Snapchat is not the same as truly knowing someone by spending time together in person. Be cautious chatting with guys you don't know; it can create a false sense of intimacy when the other person is still virtually a stranger to you.

    This is particularly important when someone doesn't live in your area and you have no mutual friends to vouch for him. You lied about your age; he could just as easily be lying to you about any number of things too.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    I think at this point you should just ghost him. You're only 14 (won't be 15 and able to give legal consent until after your birthday in January).

    If you're not going to just go radio silent on him then tell him your true age and if he still wants to meet then ask your parents if you can meet him and have him come to your home where you both can be supervised and where you'll be safe. He is a stranger after all and you are in way over your head.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Have you met? You can find better boys to date in person. You and your friend are 14 goofing around on tinder. Basically you are catfishing and that is a bad thing to do. Learn to act more grown up.
    Originally Posted by basicc
    the legal age of consent is 15 in poland Iíll be 15 in january.

  8. #7
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    Yeah, what's wrong with the boys at school? At least you can see what you're getting and the boy can see what he's getting. And who knows if this boy on Tinder is even 17. He might be 21 and lying about his age too. Just tell him your parents don't want you dating and break it off with him.

  9. #8
    Super Moderator Capricorn3's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by basicc
    (the legal age of consent is 15 in poland and we live there btw)
    That may well be the case but the real trouble here is the fact that you are only 14 years old. Yes of course you should tell him the truth, and the sooner the better. You're heading for a lot of trouble and causing a lot of potential trouble for him too. Not nice. You have plenty of time to grow up and boyfriends, but right now what you are doing is just plain wrong.

  10. #9
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    Your joke/fun has already possibly placed him in legal trouble. It doesn't matter if you pretend to be 16 or 32 and doesn't matter if he knows it or not, he is talking to a 14 yr old. So you have put him in a position that if your parents find out they can probably call the authorities.

    I would say stop talking to him. Any further communication could put him in further serious trouble.


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