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Thread: Gf left me for a guy and came back after they hooked up

  1. #1
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    Gf left me for a guy and came back after they hooked up

    I'll try to keep it short
    I'm in a bad situation with my gf. Together for 4 years and just over a year ago our relationship hit a wall. An old male school friend of my gf started working with her at the same employer. She told me that she used to fancy him in school but nothing ever happened. Long story short after a few months I started noticing things and my gut feeling was all over the place. Started maki g herself look prettier for work new clothes etc. One day I confronted her and everything came out. She had been secretly txti g this guy for a few months and it evolved into a full emotional affair. After the talk she said she wanted to leave and progress with this Co worker. She did and eventually the enevitable happened... They had sex. This is the part I'm strugglibg with. A little after they had sex so maybe a week or 2 she does a u turn and wants to come back. "it was all a big mistake and I know now that I want to be with you" etc. Fast forward a year and we are together. We got back together shortly after she wanted to come back. I've recently noticed that 3 weeks after me and my gf got back together this Co worker got into a new relationship (Facebook official). My question is what are the chances that my gf was rejected after they had sex and she only came crawling back because she was dumped by her Co worker? He was in a relationship pretty quick after they had their fling. Maybe he was seeing both and chose this other girl over my gf. My gf made out that it was she that broke it off because she wanted me back. Me and my gf have never been the same and I'm struggling to re connect with her. Things don't feel right and I am also starting to get the same gut feeling again that something isn't right.
    If she came back because she was dumped then I don't thing our relationship will last much longer.
    Any insight on this would be great. Anyone else experienced this?
    Jeff.

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    I can't believe you took back someone that cheated on you for months. She's going to do is again so if I were you, I'd permanently end things and stay away from her. Have some self esteem.

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    I think your intuition is right. You do feel that your relationship is seen as a SAFETY NET by her. She is making it not seem like cheating by "breaking up" with you before she does it, only to just come back after. Why are you getting the uneasy feeling again? What has she said that she is disatisfied by your relationship?

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    Texting behind his back and emotionally cheating is still cheating? Cheating isn't just sex.

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    The thing is we have a mortgage together so simply breaking up was never a straight option.

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    I'm thinking though that she had every Intention of leaving but he shunned her and she made out she seen the light as it were. My gut is usually pretty good at detecting things. I'm just getting this feeling because she taking more time on appearance. I've mentioned twice about how I feel the relationship isn't the same and she offers nothing toward this issue. She doesn't seem bothered that the relationship isn't great. The quality in sex isn't the same either. As I said I can't re connect with her

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    Honey c I agree. Emotional cheating is worse that physical cheating

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    Originally Posted by Jeff8619
    I'm thinking though that she had every Intention of leaving but he shunned her and she made out she seen the light as it were. My gut is usually pretty good at detecting things. I'm just getting this feeling because she taking more time on appearance. I've mentioned twice about how I feel the relationship isn't the same and she offers nothing toward this issue. She doesn't seem bothered that the relationship isn't great. The quality in sex isn't the same either. As I said I can't re connect with her
    Very few people are able to go forward after infidelity, and you're not the exception, rightly so. That said, trust is the glue that holds a relationship together, and without that you have little to go on, (imo).

    Please take a glance at my signature line...

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    She doesn't offer anything towards the issue because she DOES NOT CARE.

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    I can't believe that you took her back! Where is your self respect!

    It does not matter why she came back, but it matters that you allowed her to.

    She can't love or respect you, to treat you in this manner. I would bet money that this will happen again, but with someone else.

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