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Thread: Was I Dating A Socipath? Should I Expect Him To Return? PLEASE HELP.

  1. #91
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    Good.

    Now you can change your number and never see or hear from him again.

    Unless you want to be a statistic or a tragic story on the evening news.

  2. #92
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by keelyflood
    Hi all. I am really just using this as a place to spill how I am feeling and hopefully get some support. Last time I saw my ex, he put his hands on me (now making the abuse emotional, mental and physical). I came home being done and cutting off contact. I want 2019 to be a good start for me. Days later, I wake up to three consecutive calls from an unknown number. It was my ex, and he was “just calling to apologize for the way he treated me. That putting his hands on me was an eye opener and he’s embarrassed to even say it out loud.” I stayed silent but listened and basically he said I deserved someone better and more. I deserved a clean slate of 2019 and he said he needed to work on himself and in two, three years, I’d be his. He said he loves me and thinks of me constantly but he is not in a good head space to be with someone and he needed to work on himself. He’s done this mass amounts of times but this somehow felt like the last discard.
    Well, I'm going to assume that you got a real ego stroke from his contact and so I suggest that you don't answer any unknown numbers anymore and instead just send them to voice mail and listen to them later rather then let him BS you like that. He's not going to do a darn thing about working on himself and he just needed to have the last say.

    Don't talk to him anymore.

  3. #93
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    What do you mean by "put his hands on you"? Hit/slapped/pushed you? After that if you are calling it "making the abuse emotional, mental and physical", why are you communicating with him?

    Why are you wasting your time telling him what "you deserve"? This is not up to him. It's your call how you run your life and who you let in it or remove from it. Only therapy can help you understand what your helplessness, martyrdom, etc mindset means and guide you out of this. Telling an abusive bozo "what you deserve" is not going to turn your life around.
    Originally Posted by keelyflood
    Last time I saw my ex, he put his hands on me. he was “just calling to apologize for the way he treated me. That putting his hands on me was an eye opener and he’s embarrassed to even say it out loud.” I stayed silent but listened

  4. #94
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    I hope you change your number. Never answer calls you don’t know who it is. Be done with him. Give it a month. Start hanging out with friends, you’ll be over him in no time. During this time, don’t drink if you’ve been known to contact him if you’re drinking. You can get this person out of your system, you just have to try.

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  6. #95
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    “Last discard”

    ....

    Honestly this isn’t a narcissist circle jerk board. Go to quora for that. There are a lot of very smart people here who I admire because they advise based on life expierience and getting through some tough times.

    You refuse to listen to any of them, you go back again and again and again. You are going to end up dead Keely.

    You need help. Serious help. Not ‘support’ to coddle you until you feel ready to go back for more abuse girl... this is bad. I know how hard it is to get out of relationships like this, but you have to.

    Stop reading about narcissism and convincing yourself you’re powerless to his manipulation you aren’t you make a conscious choice to keep going back and you need to stop.

    Please.

    PM me. I will help you.

  7. #96
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    I have no idea what to expect anymore.

  8. #97
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    Originally Posted by keelyflood
    I have no idea what to expect anymore.
    How can you not know what to expect?

    He will continue to abuse you if you insist on staying in this relationship.

    I presume it was frightening and upsetting when he hurt you.

  9. #98
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Yes you do because you are hanging onto so tightly.
    Originally Posted by keelyflood
    I have no idea what to expect anymore.

  10. #99
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    At this point, I am concerned for myself. I continuously go back to this person. Therapy does not help. I have been in a neverending cycle for a year and a half. I believe the final discard was two days ago...over a pack of cigarettes he found in my purse (unopened) which lead to him calling me a liar and telling me he “didn’t want to do this anymore”. I took off in my Uber. My number was blocked. I got drunk yesterday and completely went off (my fault) telling his two friends and his mom/brother to have him talk to me because I felt insane and used and abused and thrown out. This lead to him calling me and checking on me and then blocking my number repeatedly. My damaged ass wants him to come back, obviously. My number has been since blocked. I feel like there is not light at the end of the tunnel for me. And yet I am still sitting here asking and wondering he is he does and if he will return

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