Dance teacher crush!!

Hi guys, I'm new around here, but I really needed some advice because my mind is a mess right now. It's going to be a little bit long!

So I go to a dance academy since 4 months ago and around 2 months ago I started to have a crush on one of my teachers (I'm 25 and he is 30, so age is really not my main problem). About a month ago I learned from a friend that he finds me attractive too, but he told him that he wasn't looking for a serious relationship, and that he didn't want to play with me.

I already knew he was into me because honestly he was really obvious in some of his actions, but I didn't want to grow expectations. Anyway, his physical contact grew stronger, it was like every time he saw me, he needed to touch me (on my shoulders or hugged me harder when we say goodbye at the end of his classes). And finally, last weekend we went to a 15 years old celebration where he was one of the dancers. By the end of the evening I was a little drunk (but definitely conscious) and he started to approach more (he acted a little bit shy around me at the beginning of the party).

Long story short, we ended up hooking up at my place. But instead of him going away afterwards (or falling sleep like many guys do at one night stands) he actually started to talk about a lot of personal things (like how long he hasn't been in a relationship or sexual intercourse, the reasons he started dancing an so...), and he asked me about some personal stuff too. He spent the night with me and the next day asked me to have breakfast with him. We finished breakfast and kept talking like an hour or so. After that, when we said goodbye it was like he really wanted to hug me a lot (he did it more than once, which is not usual when you say goodbye to someone). Actually, the physical contact was there the whole time, since the party till' we separated.

But here comes my mental mess.... he hasn't send me a message or given signs of something more since that day. We see each other daily and I have to recognize that the first 3 days were a little bit akward between us. But he still tries to make some contact and my friends had caught him staring at me a lot.

Here is important to mention that, at the academy I am, relationships between students (and even worse with teachers) are completely forbidden, so we obviously cannot be really open about anything while we are there, which is most of the time.

So now I really don't know how to act. I treat him like I did before all this mess, but I really really like him a lot and I'm not sure if all these "signs" I see are real or they are just my imagination. I keep focusing on my own things, but I must accept that I'm starting to feel a little obsessed with the situation. I know he likes me, but I don't know if he wants something more (and no, I'm not brave enough to ask him directly :/ )

I know he likes me, but I don't know if he wants something more (and no, I'm not brave enough to ask him directly :/ )

Well, I'm afraid you're going to have to do something. I would suggest you text him and see if he wants to meet up after school or on the weekend. He'll either say yes, or give you the excuse that he's not really looking for a relationship, etc. Then you will have your answer. So don't wait for him, especially if he's shy, just text him.

Hopefully you won't get expelled or disciplined. Stop chasing him. Quit while you are ahead. He's in the wrong for taking you up on your offer to hookup. Don't be a groupie. Stop immediately and act with the appropriate boundaries before they kick you out. Why can't you get dates outside of those at the school?

I started to have a crush on one of my teachers, we ended up hooking up at my place.

 

at the academy I am, relationships between students (and even worse with teachers) are completely forbidden

He was honest with you that he did not want a serious relationship.

You opened the door for sex and he took it.

I think you will have to accept that it was indeed a one night stand. He might have had more manners about it, but it's not going anywhere else.

Are you both men? Also, what kind of a dance academy are we talking about here? Performing arts or ballroom? The answers to these questions make all the difference.

The fact that your relationship is forbidden means he could get in a lot of trouble so it's no wonder he's backed off. You should just act as if it didn't happen and focus on other things. You can't bee together while you're both still there so it's best if you just foget about the whole thing.

Are you hoping he's willing to lose his job over you?

Here is important to mention that, at the academy I am, relationships between students (and even worse with teachers) are completely forbidden, so we obviously cannot be really open about anything while we are there, which is most of the time.

I wouldn't be surprised if besides your friends, others at the academy already know about this. These situations have a way of traveling at a high rate of speed, whether it be a workplace, school, etc.

In short, you're dancing on thin ice (no pun intended) and the chances of this ending in anything good are slim to none. I'd cut ties with this guy before you both end up on the other side of the door.