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Thread: Any minute now Iím gonna start freaking out

  1. #1
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    Any minute now Iím gonna start freaking out

    So I met up with this guy tonight after work,

    And you know how sometimes people donít QUITE like look like their photos???

    Well this was the one time in a million when you meet them and itís like oh my god theyíre sooooooo ridiculously goodlooking, how is this even possible.... he was also really really nice. We talked and laughed and he insisted on paying, though Iíve insisted Iím buying the wine next time (though he insists he is buying the food to cook for me)......... he walked me to my car and I was very good and didnít lose my inhibitions completely though we did kiss, and kiss and kiss quite a bit more in the grass verge next to where I parked.

    I feel like itís too good to be true. Like omg heís so damn hot, heís like male model material, truly, and whatís he gonna see in me!!! But also sooooo excited. I already knew he was so nice from talking on the phone - if it possible I thought he was ďtoo niceĒ at one point - now itís like omg either this isnít real, or I just hit the jackpot.

    How do people keep their cool after meeting someone so incredible?? I feel so shy right now!!

  2. #2
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    You need to look past appearances. You don't know him well enough to know you've hit the jackpot, or whether it's too good to be true.

    That's how people keep their cool - they realize that the superficial elements don't tell you who someone truly is. And they can also distinguish lust and hormones from genuine appreciation for the person in front of them.

    Keep your feet on the ground and see what the next few dates bring. Try not to get carried away just because he looks great.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    I agree with Miss Canuck.

    I do want you to find happiness, but you need to slow your roll. Deep breaths and ease into situations instead of thinking "he's perfect and this is perfect etc".

    Looks don't mean a whole lot. What you want to do is find out for sure if he is genuine and if he is worth it. You will not know that until at least the 6th or 7th date...or around about.

    The first few dates, everyone is on their best behavior. But he could be telling you anything. You need to be cautious.

    Concentrate on befriending him and actually getting to know him as a person. Don't throw all the hormones into it as it will only mess with your head.
    Take a step back, focus on who he actually is, what he's actually about, how honest he is, if he's a player or if he truly only likes you, how serious he is or if he's just wanting to get you into bed...etc..etc.

    Give things time, you can't know all those answers this quickly.

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    I'm usually impressed by someone's intellect and accomplishments. I focus on the points of their personality that makes me think they're of substance.

    Good looks are the cherry, they're never the cake.

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  6. #5
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    OP,

    I so get you.

    Oh the 'omg' the second you set your eyes on him. Lord... the 'arrow in the heart' delicious heaven. Happened to me many many years ago. My twin sister and I are walking into this pub. And these two blokes are literally walking out. And I saw one of them and I was a gonner. Looked as though 'designed' for me, height, hair, face, eyes, build, his whole demeanour. We chatted them up on the spot. About 15 mins later and in another pub him and I were snogging each other's faces off. I'd known him for 15 minutes. I didn't care, barely saw what/who was around me. How it ended is beside the point here.

    You don't know him.. get to know him. DO. NOT. TEXT. HIM. FIRST. Wait for him to lead. He leads, you follow. He texts, you respond. He asks you on a date, you say 'maybe, I will let you know tomorrow'. Re, potentially, sex - make him wait AS LONG AS YOU CAN without loosing your marbles ha ha. But make him wait. I'd say minimum 4 weeks. 1948 or 2018.. man is hunter and pursuer. Woman sits home thinking 'TEXT. ME. B-D. BEFORE I GO INSANE'. And makes him wait. The longer he waits, the better. Trust me on this.

    For now.. enjoy!! This is so blissful. So amazing. So the reason why all the best songs and novels are about the magical wonder that is falling in love.

    Let us know how it goes!!
    Last edited by Metaltwin70; 10-05-2018 at 07:13 AM.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    falling in love.
    Except it's not love. It's lust and going on barely information.

    A person needs to be reasonable and to make sensible decisions. He looks good, does not equal he is good.

    Remember what happened last time, OP, you don't want a repeat.

  8. #7
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    '..He looks good, does not equal he is good'

    Oh absolutely completely agree. Good looks do not in any way shape or form equal good human being. Don't I know all about it. Been there, done that, worn the t-shirt more times than I care to remember.

    But there is nothing in the world, no drug, no drink, no food, no substance in your bloodstream that feels better than when you wake up in the morning (alone!), remember the kisses the night before, think 'Oh my god. I want him so bad', and get a text from him saying he had a fantastic time and wants to see you again. NO-THING better.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Is this a second date with this guy or is this a new guy?
    Originally Posted by smittenkittn
    09-25-2018

    OMG I haven't felt chemistry like that in sooooooo long!! I normally don't even kiss on a first date, but, I couldn't stop kissing him, and then of course kissing led to more, and OMG OMG OMG!

    Part of me is really aware that half of what I'm feeling right now is probably oxytocin, it had been a long time since I had sex, let alone GOOD sex, but regardless..... omg how can I ensure that he asks me out again?

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    Yay for you! Lol I love that type of attraction! Were you lying in the grass? Just curious. That intensity can be hot and fizzle, enjoy it but be careful. And it sounds like the next date is at his house? I'd exercise some caution there.

    But.......what is it about you that you are feeling shy and wondering what it is he'll see in you? You need to dig to get your confidence out and know you're good enough. What's the self doubt about?

    Get to know him , outside of the intense physical chemistry you feel. Don't let it cloud your judgement.

  11. #10
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Is this a second date with this guy or is this a new guy?
    Oh boy! Lol she's in lust

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