Hi all,

Just so you get the end of the story, I accepted to meet my ex-FWB. I had reached a point where resisting made no real sense to me, it was like trying to avoid a reality that wasn't going away anyway. The thing is that we met and had a long conversation where all the truth came out: he had in fact stopped treating me the same because he was interested in the other guy. Also, he told me he has been sleeping with this other guy since August, and they're now even in what he called a relationship. Yes, it hurt.

But, though this was theoretically my greatest fear, and I had it confirmed in my face, there was something in learning the truth, and knowing that I had been right all along about my suspicions of what was happening, that has given me some kind of closure. Now I know I had no chance of making things normal again, that I've been suffering for nothing, and that I was simply left behind without being given any honest explanation of what was happening. I strangely find it easier to face the idea of being left for someone else, that not knowing what was happening and thinking I was the one that spoiled a FWB relationship that was working with my unjustified jealousy and my strange acting.

The day after that I felt really sad, and it was horrible, but also kind of cathartic. It's been a week since then and I have started to think about him less and less. I think it also helped that, though I still found him sexually attractive, I remembered all those other things about him that made me not like him that much. Now I find myself kind of silly for having given this situation so much of my time thinking and for having been in pain so many months for a guy I was just sleeping with.

I hope I'm on the way of forgetting all about this and learn something about it: that FWB are indeed dangerous, and that complex feelings can arise even when you think you are in control and don't like the other person that much!

Thank you all for your input on the matter, especially Jibralta.