Just helped GF move and overheard conversation on the phone with another guy

so I just helped my girlfriend move apartments last week. I had to help due to her credit being screwed up by her baby father. Quick note about him, they had a daughter but she is now 4yo. She can't stand him, and all he's done is ruined her life.

So I ended up being the main name on the apartment, but she will be living there. Yesterday she took off work to finish up moving her things and setting it up, we have been doing this since Friday. I had to work everyday and last night I came in and was tired and proceeded to take a nap for an hour. During this time I was awaken by her on the phone speaking to somebody I am not sure who it was. I fell asleep right by her side while she was stretched out watching TV. When I woke up I didn't completely move, just my eyes opened. So I sat there, and listened as it was a guy asking how her move was and then the conversation lead to him wanting to come over and having dinner once she is all done setting her things up. She replied to him with sure and she would let him know when. Then throughout the evening she was constantly getting texts and at one point cut me off to go and take a call in the other room as if she didt't want me to hear what she was going to talk about. It's had me on edge ever since.

I don't live at the apartment with her as I live in my own place, but just the thought of her acting that way has my stomach turning. Earlier last night she was telling me how the inspector at the old place came to do his job and near the end of it, he asked for her number which she declined and replied with "I have a bf don't you see his name on the lease" and she made that a big deal and I had to comfort her about it. After that she then told me how she was at the grocery store and ran into some guy and they hit it off just shooting the breeze and gave him her number and showed me his face from Instagram.

Now we work at the same organization so we see each other m-f and earlier this year I had a coworker get really close to me. I treated it with no mutual feelings towards her, but still went for breaks/pick up lunch. I never ate or hung around with this person outside of work. Now my GF got extremely jealous at one point and made a huge stink about the issue. From that point I have cut ties with that coworker basically. Just small casual talk if we see each other and that's rare. I didn't see any signs of this coworker being attracted to me nor was I attracted to her and stated that to my GF, but she was stuck on me liking her and she liking me and that I needed to choose who I want to be with. From that point on I basically have avoided all flirtatious activity towards any female and it has made me feeling drained tbh. I'm definitely not the player type and she knows that but it bothers me.

How is it ok to be friends with a random guy you met at the grocery store and exchange numbers and talk? And also take him up on his offer to have dinner at her place, but it's not ok for me to have female friends because it seems that I flirt when I actually don't? I don't know how to approach her with this topic as I don't want an argument/consequences to arise from it.

This morning she doesn't seem like she knows I heard her, so she's just playing it off. We have a party to attend on Saturday and so she keeps insisting that I go home and get rest Thursday and Friday so we can do errands before it starts on Saturday. To me that makes it seem that she has invited her guy friend over so they can be alone. It makes me so nervous I can't shake it. I've never done anything as bad as that would seem.

She's obviously cheating. And meeting some random in the supermarket shouldn't end with you giving your number if you're taken. You know what she's doing, question is what are you going to do about it?

I'd end things. She's not faithful.

Too bad your name is on that lease plus on your own apt. I bet you will end up paying for two apts. when this girl either leaves you or you throw her out. She seems pretty sneaky to me and you are right to be questioning things.

It sounds like she's still annoyed and is playing a sick game of attempting to make you jealous by iterating all these stories of guys hitting on her constantly. How are you handling working together? Is her baby daddy paying child support? How did "he" ruin her credit?

She sounds both immature and insecure. Don't take the bait and act blase when she pulls this "all the guys that are after me" crap. Better yet, get your name off the lease. Why doesn't she stay at your place ever?

my GF got extremely jealous at one point and made a huge stink about the issue.

I'd give her a respectable amount of time to make arrangements to move out before she would become a legal resident (generally 30 days), whereafter it would be a pain in the ass to kick her out if she were to do a quick google of he rights, and either terminate the lease, find someone else to sublease, or find someone to take it over. I couldn't tell you if this lady is full-on cheating, but with it already being a pretty terrible idea to take a lease out for her in your name, it's definitely not worth the added risk.

She has very poor boundaries.

I would tell her what you heard, and explain that random gentleman callers are not welcome at your apartment. Yes, your apartment. It's not hers. If she kicks up a fuss, which she probably will, tell her to start making alternate arrangements for accommodation.

I don't know how to approach her with this topic as I don't want an argument/consequences to arise from it.

This mindset means you are afraid of her. She has bullied you into submission.

Well.....if you don't want any consequences then the only thing to do is turn a blind eye to her cheating, when she tells you not to be around, accept that she is fck'ing some other guy in your apartment and kindly keep out and give them their privacy and smile and pretend that you totally like this and it's all good.....'cause you know....you don't want to kick her out and this humiliation is totally worth it.

I think your best course of action is to tell her you changed your mind about leasing an apartment on her behalf, her behaviour is unnaceptable and you are leaving her so she is free to pursue her new bf she met at the shop.

You are being a total doormat and your GF is taking the Michael out of your misplaced generosity.

Well I think if you honestly didn't know that the female colleague was into you (maybe she even wasn't!) then going out on work breaks with her is of course not anywhere near as bad as her chatting to some totally random guy and giving him her number AND inviting him over for dinner. If she didn't have many friends and she got chatting to another woman in the supermarket and invited her over, that would be very different. But she has a boyfriend so why on Earth would she give her number out in supermarkets? Clearly it's not just for friendship! And after all the fuss she made about your female colleague and you had to basically stop talking to all other women, what a hypocrite your girlfriend is! I mean just getting a coffee during a work break I think is normal because coworkers often pop out for coffee and it might just happen one is female and one is male.

Sorry but I think your girlfriend really has no respect for you and either has extremely poor boundaries or just plainly wants to cheat on you. Or she's really immature and just trying to make you jealous. I mean she told you about the guy from the supermarket so she wasn't hiding it from you per se but why is she even doing all this? Even if she's showing his Instagram to you then for what purpose, to make you feel jealous and like you've got competition?

How long have you been together? I would consider breaking up with her because after everything you have done for her with the apartment, she's acting very disrespectful and shady!

You are a major chump for putting your name on the apartment. She could have had family do it, or move somewhere with a private landlord who just rents out one or two units that would be flexible or move into a roommate situation with another mom. She used you for sure. And you are awful for basically dating another coworker right in front of her face

Why in the world would you sign for her. Foolish, even if she wasn't cheating. This is the best way to screw up your credit.

She is cheating.