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Couldn't go through with termination (trigger warning)


Lalaxoxo

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A few of you may have seen my post awhile back about wanting to get an abortion. To recap the back story I have a 6 month old and me and my boyfriend are not financially stable we don't own our own home. The most obvious choice seemed to be to get an abortion done well I went to get one today and waited hours all about made it to the last point until they tell me I am about 13 weeks farther along than expected(my periods were unpredictable because I breastfeed) and a they explained things I just couldn't go through with it. I abruptly left. It is too gruesome. Now I feel at war with myself. I don't think it is an option for me however I just can't imagine raising another baby and I know everyone will judge as I'm only 22. My boyfriend is being very supportive but he knows as well as I we are not in any condition to have another. I would love some insight. I am not shutting out adoption it would be odd but I Am open I just know abortion is not for me :( I feel very alone because the only family member who knows is urging me to get rid of it and being negative quite frankly I understand all the negatives already but it is what it is.

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There's open adoption where you remain a part of his/her life.

 

You are very young, so naturally you're scared you can't make it, but dont forget you have the love and support of your boyfriend, which some don't have in your situation. As far as the family member, it's your body and your right so don't ever make a decision based on what anyone else feels is right, because you ultimately have to live with the choice you make.

 

There is help out there. You're not married, so you may be entitled to state benefits, depending upon where you live.

Research what's out there for help. Things always seem impossible but they can end up working out if you find the right avenues. Don't give up hope.

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Thank you sweegirl28 your words mean a lot. I will be looking into what sort of financial assistance I could receive. I live in Canada and our mat leave is one year so I've been getting decent money to stay home with our son but because I won't return to work by the time the next is born that is one of my main concerns! I will have to see into it.

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Girl, you got this.

 

Since you are tied to your faith, seek out a pregnancy center that is connected to your archdiocese. Catholic Churches have sponsored centers to help women who are pregnant without any judgement. Check there first. You will be ok.

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If you don't want an abortion, don't get one! I am very pro-choice, and your choice is a totally valid one and no one else can make it for you. Now you have to think about whether you want to raise both of your children or give up this one for adoption. Both choices have pros and cons, and I think whatever choice you make will be the right one for you. Don't worry if people judge that you are 22 and have 2 children. In some ways, it is good because you have more energy (but not as much money) at your age. I have friends my age who are having children, they have money, but not enough energy. There is really never any right time to have kids. On the plus side, your kids will be grown when you are 40, while my friends who are 40 and having babies now won't have grown kids until they are 60. In any case, just think on it, think through your options, and come up with a decision that will be the best choice for your family.

 

hugs

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Well, nobody on their deathbed says I wish I had less kids. My mother had me when she was 22 and my bother when she was 24, so you can do it. But I think it's time for you and your boyfriend to become adults. He should step up and do the right thing, if you know what I mean. And he should get a job so he can support you and his children. And because of your previous pregnancy, you know that you need extra medical care, so you should be under the strict care of an obstetrician and follow high-risk pregnancy procedures. And hopefully, you have friends and family who can help you out. You can get by and everything can turn out OK.

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