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Thread: Getting in my own head

  1. #691
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by boltnrun

    So yeah, you're getting some kind of payoff here.
    Bingo. So are we, thinking weíll crack the code, we arenít...

    *goes back to echo chamber with popcorn to watch the show*

  2. #692
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    Originally Posted by figureitout23
    Bingo. So are we, thinking weíll crack the code, we arenít...

    *goes back to echo chamber with popcorn to watch the show*
    LOL @ crack the code.

    That's actually a great way of putting it!

    It's like a mystery that we MUST solve!!

    And through hell or high water, we're gonna solve it!! LOL

  3. #693
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    It's not that complex.

    Alex, you are frantic for a boyfriend. ALL your friends are married or have boyfriends and you are embarrassed and ashamed to be "the ONLY one" who's single. This leads you to eagerly leap on any man who gives you the slightest crumb of attention. Which then leads you to choose poorly because you are so desperate to have a boyfriend you aren't taking even a minimum amount of time to get to know any of the 4 or 5 men who have been your "boyfriend" since you started this thread.

    It's really painful to read. What's even more painful is your refusal to acknowledge you might, just might, be going about getting a boyfriend the wrong way. You just keep doing the same thing over and over and manage to learn NOT ONE THING from your awful experiences.

    Please tell your parents you are in urgent need of counseling. I'm sure they will give you the $100 per week you say therapy costs.

  4. #694
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    It's not that complex.

    Alex, you are frantic for a boyfriend. ALL your friends are married or have boyfriends and you are embarrassed and ashamed to be "the ONLY one" who's single. This leads you to eagerly leap on any man who gives you the slightest crumb of attention. Which then leads you to choose poorly because you are so desperate to have a boyfriend you aren't taking even a minimum amount of time to get to know any of the 4 or 5 men who have been your "boyfriend" since you started this thread.

    It's really painful to read. What's even more painful is your refusal to acknowledge you might, just might, be going about getting a boyfriend the wrong way. You just keep doing the same thing over and over and manage to learn NOT ONE THING from your awful experiences.

    Please tell your parents you are in urgent need of counseling. I'm sure they will give you the $100 per week you say therapy costs.
    I disagree bolt.

    I used to agree, but now just seeing these latest responses especially, I think it IS that complex and I donít think we truly comprehend whatís going on.

    A.) because weíre receiving her interpretation of these situations. Due to trauma she states her view of things is slanted. So is her boyfriend upset because heís crossing boundaries or did she make it seem like heís crossing boundaries when all he did was agree to go? Is the mother refusing to go because the mother has boundary issues or is she refusing to go because Alex painted it that she didnít really want the Mom to go... you know Iím a huge fan or reading between the lines thereís just a lot about this latest... fiasco thatís just incredibly dramatic and Iím not so sure where itís coming from.
    B.) itís gotten so bad now 9 times out of 10 we arenít even acknowledged. The only other poster Iíve seen do that is the one dude whoís been stalking his ex wife for 5 years believing sheís still jealous of him, and we know thereís something off there. Thereís a definite disconnect. What that is I have no idea but I do not think this is a basic girl who needs a boyfriend weíve encountered those on this board. This is different.

    I know Iím like a broken record but I really and truly think whatever is going on in her head is leaps and bounds above our heads.

  5.  

  6. #695
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    @fio, I think there is something deeper going on too, I have my suspicions what it is, but would never say it here.

    Not important, only that it's something deeper and goes far beyond anything we can help her with.

    Her not learning anything after 70 pages and not acknowledging (or even interested in) our posts is a clear indication of that imo. But no doubt there is probably more.

    That said, I agree with bolt too. She is desperate for a boyfriend, and as such she does choose men poorly.

    She continues to make the same mistakes because either she's unable to learn or not interested in learning.

    What's the definitely of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result?

    I'm not saying amk is insane, course not. But hopefully if she's reading this (huge If), she understands what I mean.

    I am not sure what it's going to take for her to acknowledge she needs professional help.

    Another physically abusive RL? God I hope not!!!
    Last edited by katrina1980; 04-15-2019 at 08:41 PM.

  7. #696
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Go with your mother. She is the only constant in your life and the only one who sticks around.

  8. #697
    Member frustrated1's Avatar
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    Iíve been following this thread for some time but have not felt compelled to respond until now. However I am sure that you will probably not read this, or perhaps you will and it just wonít penetrate, but Iím hoping that someoneís response might get through to you. First off you donít know who he is, so you saying he is not being himself is not really possible for you to gauge. In fact I think this situation has actually caused him to show you his true colours, and you are simply choosing to ignore it (as you seem to do whenever something someone says or does, does not fit in with your perception or is not something you want to hear). Secondly the fact that you are willing to essentially push your MOTHER aside for a guy whom you have known for a few weeks, is just baffling to me. It really just underscored how desperate you really are for a relationship. Two weeks in is farrrr too early to be making trip and vacation plans, and months in advance too. Both of you actually sound quite codependent and desperate to be with someone. I can only see this codependency growing in the future, likely leading to a very dysfunctional relationship. You also state that you have not had any problems up until this point.... again.... itís been two weeks!! There should be no problems.

  9. #698
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    deleted...............

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