It gets better!

How is everyone doing? It’s been over a year since the break up and we had some contact back in November and kept in contact off and in until today when I told him to stop contacting me! I’m really tired of it. Instead of hurt, I’m annoyed. Definitely in a different place than I was last year. I’m not gonna lie, I still have feelings for him and I think he knows that so he tries to use that to his advantage. On the other hand I know I deserve so much more. I feel good about myself and am much happier. I look back and can’t believe I felt that way about someone. It’s funny how the tables have turned. Ladies and gentlemen, love yourself!

Great progress!

@Cluelessny

I am so happy for you . It is also good to hear your progress. Thanks for posting this . It helps to hear .

Yes EXCELLENT news... onwards and upwards!

I like this quote...

'give yourself the love you never recieved'

thats my new motto, till i meet miss right! (in the next life )

I'm going to be the a**hole and say it.

You set yourself back by staying in contact.

You're ok now, but once the reality of it ending... again... sets in you may very well be set back. I hope for your sake I'm wrong and this contact has actually catapulted your healing. I really do hope that. It's not the road I would take nor would I suggest others take though, way too risky.

It does get better, one day at a time, distancing yourself and taking the time to heal, it deffinetely gets better.

ETA: Good for you for ending things with a married man. You really and truly do deserve so much better. I hope you stick to it this time. Seriously, you wrote this exact post last year, stop going back, you deserve better, you know you do!

@figureitout23, I wasn’t ending it again (relationship wise), I was ending the contact. He wanted to stay friends and so did I (or so I thought). I think it was only because I still had feelings for him but that doesn’t make it right. My point was, to get to the point I am from the point I was, I have to say I am proud of myself and people in this situation who feel like things can’t or won’t get better, they can and will. I used to feel like all that mattered was him and I was never gonna get over it but here I am living like like it never happened (to some extent). I’m here for anyone who wants to talk. Doesn’t matter the time, I will listen.

Congrats! This indicates you are over the hump and it's smooth sailing from now on, maybe even starting dating again.

I told him to stop contacting me! I’m really tired of it. Instead of hurt, I’m annoyed.

@figureitout23, I wasn’t ending it again (relationship wise), I was ending the contact. He wanted to stay friends and so did I (or so I thought). I think it was only because I still had feelings for him but that doesn’t make it right. My point was, to get to the point I am from the point I was, I have to say I am proud of myself and people in this situation who feel like things can’t or won’t get better, they can and will. I used to feel like all that mattered was him and I was never gonna get over it but here I am living like like it never happened (to some extent). I’m here for anyone who wants to talk. Doesn’t matter the time, I will listen.

I hear you.

I just think you are jumping the gun.

You decided less than 24 hours ago that you're done. Which is amazing and I am beyond happy for you, but just like last year you're claiming victory before the battle has even began.

Slow down, because otherwise once reality sets in you will reach out again. I mean it's unrealistic to use phrases like 'I look back and can't believe I cared for him' you mean all of two days ago?!?

Also, how do you plan on being 'here for anyone who wants to talk' when you're a flyby poster? You get strong. You decide to end things you declare it's all over and you're a beacon of hope then you disappear, usually because you fell off the wagon again. That would be like me being in alcoholics anonymous and my sponsor calls me once a week after getting loaded over the weekend.

You made a huge step forward, enjoy that, but again, get ready for battle, get ready to do the hard work of healing. It's more than just words clue. Honestly after what you've been through therapy would really help.

But first and foremost - Block and delete and keep it that way.

Congrats again on this first step.

Agree with Wiseman that it sounds like you are finally over that hump, the pain of loss has subsided and sounds like you are really ready to move forward with your life. You are well on your way to "meh" regarding your ex.

I'd also warn about not counting your chickens before they hatch. Many times I've had friends who reach this stage and think they're strong enough to resist going back, so they end up being 'just friends' with the other person and then it happens all over again.

Even so, you're doing brilliantly, just stick to your guns and keep busy meeting other people