Help, I need advice!

My mother wants me to go with her to Europe with my brother as a family vacation, I asked my girlfriend if she would like to come but can’t because of her job and she’s not that interested. She has a problem with me going because it’s a 18 day trip and even mentioned it may lead to a break up. We’ve been together for a little over 2 years and I think she is not acting fair plus it’s with my family. I’m fustrated And don’t know what to do. What do you people think ?

Wow. What other red flags are in your relationship?

That’s it really but I don’t know how to deal with that I love traveling and I do really want to go, am I wrong for thinking she’s acting really unreasonable?

I'd go to Europe and I'd send her a post card just for laughs. Sincerely.

Go. Someone who loves and trusts you would never hold you back from this opportunity. If she can't handle it and does not trust you, then she isn't the one for you.

Go. Someone who loves and trusts you would never hold you back from this opportunity. If she can't handle it and does not trust you, then she isn't the one for you.

^^^ This. She is acting like quite the control freak. She is also being ridiculous telling you not to go on a family trip. If she cant be without you for 18 days, she's got some issues. This is not the kind of person you want to share your life with. She ought to be supportive of a family holiday.

I agree with the above posters.

Tell her you are going and that you genuinely hope she's still here when you get back. Don't give her the option to fight with you about it.

You're an adult, you make your own decisions. She probably has some irrational fear that you're going to meet someone and fall head over heels in those 18 days and completely forget about her.

Even if she does have those irrational fears, it's ridiculous and she can't trust you very much at all if she thinks this is a possibility.

Let her know you're going and that you hope she keeps in contact with you or speaks to you when you return.But don't let her stop you.

Vacations like this with family are limited, remember that...take each opportunity with them that you can right now.

She has a problem with me going because it’s a 18 day trip and even mentioned it may lead to a break up.

She’s not the right girlfriend for threatening this over a family vacation. I’d tell her to take a hike.

What is she, 12? Go on the trip. You'll thank yourself later.

Don't be blackmailed. The emphasis is on She has a problem. Don't ever let someone dictate garbage like this to you. Enjoy your vacation and if ms clingy and possessive breaks up, consider it a blessing. Call her bluff, act indifferent to her nonsense.

She has a problem with me going because it’s a 18 day trip and even mentioned it may lead to a break up.

Guys thanks for the help it got to the fact that she would give me 14 days but that’s it. It was hard but we ended it. Thanks for the support

I'm sorry it turned out that way but it was the right thing. Your partner should never become your warden. This was a vacation with your family (and trust me they won't be there forever).

It would have been different had it been with guy friends (but even then she should trust you). But with family?!? She should have been supportive.

You need to be with someone who loves you enough that they will support you and gives you their trust. This girl has none of that for you.

Yeah I’m sad, I just dont understand why it has to be 14 days or a certain amount of days and she’s so good to me but you are right. Thanks for everything Sherry

I hope you can still come back and keep us updated. You always have support here.

Thanks I guess it sounds weird but I feel guilty because I know she loves me so much and I love her too and I see a future with her but I also know that it’s not right that she’s telling this ultimatum and I know that if she does this what if something similar will happen in the future but I guess it’s just the emotions

You're right, you can't be controlled by someone else, that's not love nor is it right.

If she does love you like she claims to, perhaps she will finally see her errors and will change. It is possible.

I hope whatever that whatever outcome happens that you feel it's the right thing for you. Just give it time.

Ey, I'm for real about the post card thing. Do it, brother.

The 14 days is completely arbitrary. She wants to dictate what she wants and that's it. If it's not this, it would be something else. Maybe this is the first time you go against her, and this is what happened.

Thanks I guess it sounds weird but I feel guilty because I know she loves me so much and I love her too and I see a future with her but I also know that it’s not right that she’s telling this ultimatum and I know that if she does this what if something similar will happen in the future but I guess it’s just the emotions

If you really love someone, you want what's best for them. This is a great opportunity for you and she should have your back and encourage you to go. If she really loved you she'd give you the trust you deserve and have likely earned. Anything else is not love. It's a control, insecurities and selfishness.

If she's willing to split hairs on the difference of 4 days, then I'd let her go.

Turn the tables. If she had the same opportunity, how would you react?

Expect the same in return.

Thanks I guess it sounds weird but I feel guilty because I know she loves me so much and I love her too and I see a future with her but I also know that it’s not right that she’s telling this ultimatum and I know that if she does this what if something similar will happen in the future but I guess it’s just the emotions

I'm going to be the odd man out and say that I don't think this is over

You two sound young, maybe even teens. These are the immature games, people play when they're young. She's testing boundaries because she's upset she won't get to see you for some time. Essentially she's throwing a fit, and you're, rightfully calling her bluff. It's just that in my opinion, a bluff, and I have a strong feeling you two will reconnect whether it's while you're gone or before you leave or after you come back, I'm not a psychic, but I've been young and I've seen enough young relationships that play these games. Not to mention, let's be real, you aren't done, this isn't your boundary, this is us telling you it should be a boundary. People don't typically end relationships on other people's boundaries, well they do, but they just end up getting back together or regretting it, because if the decision isn't yours, you're making a decision in the heat of the moment, just like she is, again because you're young.

I'd just give her some space, enjoy your vacation and see what happens.

Agree with both of these. It's an empty threat, so send her a postcard. Preferably one from a beach area with a lot of girls in bikinis depicted on it. 🌴 👓 👙

I'd go to Europe and I'd send her a post card just for laughs. Sincerely.

I'm going to be the odd man out and say that I don't think this is over