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Was in a LDR for 1.5 years. We were in contact every day of course, and met up about 10 times.

 

She broke up with me saying I was lazy and didn't motivate her which to be fair was true. I had quit my job and been lazy to find a new one. She said she felt pressured by the need to skype and text all the time. She said she wanted to be friends, could never erase me and we would see what happens etc. Which could have been nonsense but I took it as a positive. So I've been working hard to improve myself. Working, exercising and generally being more productive and she can see those improvements.

 

But she blows hot and cold. Some days we have great conversations like the old days, sometimes her replies are totally boring and disinterested.

 

What am I supposed to do? Of course, I want her back, but I'm lost. I feel like I'm getting nowhere with us just talking on whatsapp, magically hoping something will happen someday. Do I call her and try and have a heart to heart, write her a letter, or just forget about it all?

 

Thanks

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What you should do is find a girl who lives near you to date. Spend all this time talking IN PERSON to someone that you can actually touch, hold their hand, and look into their eyes. You're wasting your time with this online girl. Apparently she has free time on her hands, but not as much free time as in the past.

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The relationship is over. She said what she did about being friends and not losing you, because you are an important part or her social support network that would hurt to just cut off. She's using you until she meets a man locally who will fulfill her emotional needs. Stop being her crutch. Go NC and show her that you won't settle for less than a committed relationship. I guarantee if you don't, you will be making a post in the next few months about how she coldly moved on when the two of you were still in communication.

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Stop contacting her. She already gave you all the reasons she broke up. LDRs are annoying in themselves but worse with forced cyber-interaction. Stop beating your head against the wall. Instead put your energy towards improving your life circumstances such as getting a job, getting in shape, etc.

I'm getting nowhere with us just talking on whatsapp
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