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Thread: Terminating pregnancy.. Women only please.

  1. #1
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    Terminating pregnancy.. Women only please.

    I would like some advice on having an abortion done or if anyone has any personal experiences that aren't horrible. I really only want women's opinions because it is not a man's issue unless perhaps your wife has had one and you have something to say.

    I have always been pro life. I never thought I would be seriously considering abortion. However I currently have a 5 month old. I am a young mom and my boyfriend and I do not own our own house and are not financially stable. I have money saved up and have everything my son needs etc but we are in no situation to have a second baby. I also had an extremely rough pregnancy and labor very painful and traumatic. I can't imagine taking care of my infant son while being pregnant again. I want to give him the attention and love he deserves and I want to focus on him. All these reasons make it obvious I should get an abortion but I haven't told anyone but my partner and I feel like I would love to hear from other women opinions etc...

    Also please be kind. I was breastfeeding my son so never went on BC I personally hate hormonal bc anyway. I figured I never received a proper period due to nursing. So I never took a test. I ignored nausea and exhaustion I figure I am Atleast 2 months along right now. Just took a home test on the weekend and got a BFP. I am torn because if I were in a different stage in life I wouldn't want an abortion but I just don't see how it could ever work out.. :(

  2. #2
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    Pro-choice staunch atheist here, been there, done that - once - many many years ago. Absolutely, yes, terminate if you feel that this is what you need to do due to your specific set of current circumstances.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member thealchemist's Avatar
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    Sorry but you don't really get to determine the gender of people who respond.

    I am personally a pro-life individual.

    But what my wife and I decide to do is our business and no one elses'.

    Just like what you decide to do is totally on you, no one else is going to have to deal with the consequences.

    If you can't support or deal with a new child then get one.

    I have supported a couple friends who have and the procedure wasn't an issue, just helping them with emotional support was the biggest thing.

    Especially with already having all the weight on your shoulders of a newborn, keep an eye on your mental state.

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    Platinum Member journeynow's Avatar
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    Would you consider adoption?

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    I am very pro-choice for women. I am agnostic, however I believe sometimes in life we are faced with hard decisions. I believe you are making the right choice for your family. It is unfortunate in this world that the minority of a legal, majority-rule procedure seeks out vulnerable women such as yourself and subjects them to feel a high degree of self deprecation just because they have the loudest, persistent voice and an unrelenting need to be heard.

    If you are at two months, then I suggest you go as soon as possible to a doctor who can prescribe you an abortion pill. I would try to go to planned parenthood first, if your GP can't refer you to a practitioner who can give you this medication. Avoid crisis pregnancy centers. If you must go to a dedicated abortion clinic, then I would do your research first to make sure there are not any radical, right wing protesters outside the facility. I am not sure how widespread they are, but those people have no right to make you feel bad about this decision. Just know, many pro-life people do not force their views onto those who are pro-choice. Pro-life is their own view, while they believe others should have their own choice. It's just these radical groups who make pro-choice people feel bad through their caustic methods in order to become pro-life.

    Be kind to yourself, and good luck.

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    Thank you everyone. Journeynow: I am not considering adoption because one of the major deterents is how horrible my last pregnancy was. I had unexplained bleeding multiple times. Lots of cramping and pre term contractions. I can't imagine taking care of my son like that. I'd have to be on bed rest. There is no way it would work I have Noone to take care of him and as he gets busier and moving more it would be a nightmare....if I did chose to endure all that I would just keep the baby.

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    Yatsue than u for Ur kind words. I am in Canada not sure if we have planned parenthood I was just looking at a women's center. I have watched documentaries and I am afraid of being shamed because I know it would work even if I saw protestors. I would want to run out. I hope that is not my experience.

  9. 07-30-2018, 12:12 PM

  10. #8
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    My mom got one after two boys because my 2nd brother was so completely needy, she couldn't picture having this kid. Then she wanted a girl years later, and had a miscarriage, and prayed for a girl, then had me! So, technically, I'm God's gift to the world...j/k, not really

    I've had one when I was 29/30. Heavily pressed on by my now ex. Thank goodness I never had a kid with him. Now I have two healthy, awesome boys. I'm Christian if that makes a difference, but believe a woman's body is her own right. Gotta do right by you and your family. No regrets either.

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    Originally Posted by Lalaxoxo
    Yatsue than u for Ur kind words. I am in Canada not sure if we have planned parenthood I was just looking at a women's center. I have watched documentaries and I am afraid of being shamed because I know it would work even if I saw protestors. I would want to run out. I hope that is not my experience.
    Obviously I am a U.S. citizen haha. I would only take a referral or suggestion from a licenced practitioner and avoid researching online. It can lead to an illegitimate agency, which I would never want for you. Once you get a referral, please call the clinic before going to see how their setup is ahead of time. Don't be afraid to ask about what the procedure is in general, their rates, or if there are protesters outside. Your visit should be as welcoming as possible.

    Since you'll be there anyway, I would talk to a physician about non-hormomal BC options. I have a hormonal IUD, but there's a non-hormonal copper IUD. Works great and fairly easy insertion! Incredibly effective, one of the most actually besides sterilization. Alternatives are diaphrams, condoms, spermacides, sponges, etc. You have effective options and I suggest you learn about them.

    I am surprised so far at other posts. You were clear you do not want to go through with the pregnancy and have decided on abortion. I only hope there will be more encouragement and input about your decision to abort. This is the choice you have made. I have no doubt you have thought long and hard about it, but feel undeserved shame from those radical few in society who have made pro-choice people feel that way.

    BTW if you abort, you can definitely get pregnant again. Abortions do not effect your fertility. You are young and have time, my dear.

  12. 07-30-2018, 12:52 PM

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    Originally Posted by SweetGirl28
    I'm probably one of the ones you're referring to. I'm just offering a clinical pov from experience working in it.
    Of course it's her decision, and should not feel swayed to make a decision based on what anyone feels. But she asked , so she has to be prepared for whatever responses are received. No one is shaming her. She doesn't need to let anyone know her ultimate decision. It's her personal business.
    I didn't say you were shaming her. In an earlier post I referenced radical, pro-life people who protest and actively shame women who get abortions.

    On a completely different note, I said I am just surprised she was asking advice about abortions and gets advice about adoption when she was clear it wasn't what she wanted in the first place, instead presumptively assuming she's asking about it because she doesn't want one. Not every woman knows what it's like to go through one. Humans seek comfort in familiarity and she hasn't experienced this before. The unknown can be scary. While abortion shouldn't be, we all fear what we aren't familiar with.

  14. 07-30-2018, 01:03 PM

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