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Thread: What should I do?

  1. #21
    Bronze Member sadbutrue's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by figureitout23
    I apologize sad, I read your post referencing his contacting you. It was a d*ck move, he probably wanted an ego boost. Unfortunately just because someone gets clean doesn't mean they suddenly become mature adults.

    Block him. And start to work on you. You can do it! One day at a time.
    Yeah I thought since he was clean, he would be a normal human being with emotions like others but he is just heartless.

  2. #22
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    I will give you that one, but in that same line of thinking, a 'normal' human being wouldnt have given him a chance to come back again.

    Humans don't always act normally.

    You have to be responsible for your well being. You responded because you wanted to reconcile. You have to let that go, healing will be a lot smoother once you do that.

  3. #23
    Bronze Member sadbutrue's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by figureitout23
    I will give you that one, but in that same line of thinking, a 'normal' human being wouldnt have given him a chance to come back again.

    Humans don't always act normally.

    You have to be responsible for your well being. You responded because you wanted to reconcile. You have to let that go, healing will be a lot smoother once you do that.
    What I meant with normal was that normal people have feelings, he doesn't have feelings nor emotions. Even his mom told me he has no feelings. Good or bad I have emotions.

  4. #24
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    I understand that you are hurting but not sure why you want revenge. If you're hurt that he reached out while you were NC, only to turn around and ignore you, I get that. He was checking your temperature. In other words, checking to see if he still had a way in should he need you for something later on. You confirmed that he could, he was satisfied, and went back into no contact. I'm sure you may feel angry or even humiliated for breaking NC and letting him make you vulnerable again.

    The fact that he's ignoring you confirms that he does not care about you. My ex is 60 years old and he ignored me too ---after asking for no contact then reaching out to me. It stings a little but that means that he can never reach out to me ever again. He faciliated the NC so hold him to it. You should feel the same way. You reached out, he ignored you, so hes back in NC. Block your toxic ex, heal and move forward with your life. Your life WILL improve, and the hurt will ease with time. My ex added no value to my life, he only hurt me and broke my spirit---and from what you say here, yours didnt either.

    Stop trying to love people who don't give a damn about you. At least your ex didnt actually say that like mine did, but he is showing you. Consider yourself lucky that he removed himself from your life, and it's up to you to keep it that way. Good luck to you.

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  6. #25
    Bronze Member sadbutrue's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by smJackson
    I understand that you are hurting but not sure why you want revenge. If you're hurt that he reached out while you were NC, only to turn around and ignore you, I get that. He was checking your temperature. In other words, checking to see if he still had a way in should he need you for something later on. You confirmed that he could, he was satisfied, and went back into no contact. I'm sure you may feel angry or even humiliated for breaking NC and letting him make you vulnerable again.

    The fact that he's ignoring you confirms that he does not care about you. My ex is 60 years old and he ignored me too ---after asking for no contact then reaching out to me. It stings a little but that means that he can never reach out to me ever again. He faciliated the NC so hold him to it. You should feel the same way. You reached out, he ignored you, so hes back in NC. Block your toxic ex, heal and move forward with your life. Your life WILL improve, and the hurt will ease with time. My ex added no value to my life, he only hurt me and broke my spirit---and from what you say here, yours didnt either.

    Stop trying to love people who don't give a damn about you. At least your ex didnt actually say that like mine did, but he is showing you. Consider yourself lucky that he removed himself from your life, and it's up to you to keep it that way. Good luck to you.
    Exactly! He broke my spirit as well, and destroyed my selfsteem which was probably already low. Many other things happened in my life and none of them helped my state of mind. I suffered from bad anxiety after he manipulated so much during the relationship. When something went wrong or I found out one of his lies he would scream and say he would kill himself. And then he would disappear, not even his family would know about him.

    So yes, I will cut him off. I'm mad at him but also mad at myself.

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