Is he the jerk or am I? My experience with a vacation fling

I went on a trip to Mexico and I met a guy while out at a club. We hit it off instantly and I felt there was an intense connection between us. The next morning he was texting me and asking me to come to his all inclusive resort and hang by the beach all day. Sadly it was too long of a drive and my friends said no. He said he definitely wanted to meet up later that night at the clubs. He let me know he made it to the club and it took me another 30 mins to arrive. I see him making out with another girl and I walk away. He comes up to me later apologizing but proceeds to say he wouldnt be mad if the shoe were on the other foot. So I forgave him and we started walking the streets together. His cousin was wasted and decided to storm off saying he was going home. So in return my guy started to bug out and frantically started looking for him. He said a quick sorry, gave me a small kiss and left. Left me alone at 4am on the dark streets of Cabo. Now I was fairly close to my hotel thank goodness (maybe 10 min walk). I knew he was concerned about his cousin, I get it but when he didn't even ask if I made it back safely was a huge flag for me. I HAD to message him to see if he found him and sure enough his cousin caught a cab home. So after my friends convinced me that what he did was wrong I told him he wasnt who I thought he was after all. His response the next day was "I left you within walking distance to your hotel. So sorry if I was concerned for the well being of my cousin that I didn't live up to your expectations.lol Have a safe flight" I came back to the states confused, wondering why I still had feelings for this guy who basically had no respect for me. He has continued to look at my snapchat stories every day while he stayed in cabo for another week but no messages. So that was confusing too. Should I contact him and apologize for jumping to conclusions or just chalk it up as he just isn't interested?

How is this classified as a fling? Did you two sleep together that first night?

Either way. What happens in Cabo, stays in Cabo, what Ive learned in my life is vacation flings are just that, flings, especially one where there was drama, sheesh.

If you did sleep togther, Im going to go ahead and say, casual sex isnt for you. You seem to get attached easily.

"wondering why I still had feelings for this guy who basically had no respect for me."

Because you have low self-worth and you pursue or desire men who don't value you, because that's what you think you deserve. Work on your self esteem and you will cut off men who don't care about you, leaving you single for when a man who is worthy of you comes along.

So if I read this right, he invited you to meet him at the club, and when you arrived, he was making out with another chick?

In what world is this acceptable to you? Come on now.

The correct action would have been to walk out and never speak to him again.

THe fact you did set the stage for everything that happened after that.

Nevermind that he left you on a dark street late at night in a strange country, nevermind that he tried to guilt trip you when you confronted him, nevermind worrying about whether or not he's interested (a big NO), this is on *you* for choosing to carry on with this bozo after you saw him locking lips with another chick at the club, after inviting you.

Sorry this was harsh, but girl, what the * were you thinking??? SMH

You went by yourself to meet a stranger at a club....in Mexico? Do you not read the news?

I'm so glad you're even here to write to us.

First of all, you shouldn't have gone. Your friends were right. Secondly, the minute you saw him kissing another girl should have been the minute you called your friends to come get you.

Wow.

OP, this wasn't a vacation fling.

This was a random you met two nights in a club, one who invited you to come and see him and then proceeded to make out with another girl. And left you standing in the street alone at night. No, he's not interested in you. He was interested in hooking up, but that's it.

Why are you still even giving this guy access to you on social media, let alone pondering apologizing to him? Where the heck is your dignity, and common sense? Jerk or not, you put yourself in an incredibly risky situation. You need to use your head more, girl.

Sorry to hear this. However chasing players around clubs/resorts and engaging in unsafe practices is on you. He's not your long-term bf who you went on a trip with together. Time to get things in perspective.

I went on a trip to Mexico and I met a guy while out at a club. Left me alone at 4am on the dark streets of Cabo.

This doesn't even qualify as a fling. You met some random dude twice at a club and that's it. How do you go from that to treating him like he is your bf and like he should care about you? You should apologize to your friends for acting like such a fool over this guy and also thank them for stopping you from doing worse to yourself. Block him from your social media before you embarrass yourself even more than you already have.

Agree with above posts. Sounds like he was just having a wild time in Cabo, having fun with multiple woman. Wouldn’t consider it a fling I would delete from Snapchat and just chalk it up to a vacation hook up

Sweet Jesus, what on Earth were you thinking!? Random guys in Mexico!? You're lucky you weren't sold as a sex slave to a drug cartel! Delete him off your snapchat and move on with your life.

And educate yourself on the world around you. Good lord.

"I left you within walking distance to your hotel. So sorry if I was concerned for the well being of my cousin that I didn't live up to your expectations.lol Have a safe flight"?

I agree with all the other responses but wanted to add in the passive aggressive send off he gave you in the end.

If you didn't already catch on, that was his way to displace any responsibility for what happened and it's a half arsed attempt to get you to feel guilty for his bad behavior.

. . and it worked.

Sweet Jesus, what on Earth were you thinking!? Random guys in Mexico!? You're lucky you weren't sold as a sex slave to a drug cartel! Delete him off your snapchat and move on with your life.

 

And educate yourself on the world around you. Good lord.

+1. Op, needs to get her priorities straight. She is in a strange country, with a stranger at 4am on a dark street, and the only thing she can think of currently is how he still feels about her.

And, the kicker is that you thought that a 10 min walk in that situation was okay, and that it took your friends to tell you that this was wrong. Amazing how some women think....

Thanks for the input

You went by yourself to meet a stranger at a club....in Mexico? Do you not read the news?

 

I'm so glad you're even here to write to us.

 

First of all, you shouldn't have gone. Your friends were right. Secondly, the minute you saw him kissing another girl should have been the minute you called your friends to come get you.

 

Wow.

No my friends came with me. I was upset and wanted to leave but they told me to get over it and forgive him. And yes I did think a 10 min walk to the hotel was bad...i was terrified.

Forgive him? He isn't asking for your forgiveness, as far as I understood. You were already tossing your dignity aside when you went with him after you found him with some other girl. That is where you should have forgotten about this guy.

You need to chalk this up to a vacation hook-up gone wrong, and leave it behind you. This dude doesn't care about you at all.

Yeah and next time, if a guy does all these things,it's time to drop him.

Come on, you can't be that desperate..honestly you need to have some self respect!

He is a player (which is why he was kissing another woman the first time you agreed to meet) that alone should have been enough.

Leave it alone now, don't go chasing even more it will make you look even more desperate.

Maybe consider who these "friends" are too that pushed you to forgive him. They helped make you look a fool.

Thanks for the input

Sorry to be harsh on you, but I don't want you becoming a victim in these types of situations.

Not to pile on, but you do not even know if that guy that stormed off was his cousin or maybe yet another "interest" of his, verdad?

Yes, definitely lesson learned.

Sweet Jesus, what on Earth were you thinking!? Random guys in Mexico!? You're lucky you weren't sold as a sex slave to a drug cartel! Delete him off your snapchat and move on with your life.

 

And educate yourself on the world around you. Good lord.

Interesting story --- i was in Mexico on spring break and one of the girls I was with met a guy....who went to school 12 miles from our school. He had a shirt from the school and knew too many of the same people or things for him to be faking that he was.....and he ignored her when she tried to get together once everyone was home (we did end up seeing him around, but he was not interested). Still - i agree. even if the guy was your neighbor.....i wouldn't try for a vacation romance