Future Cheater?

i have been with My girlfriend for around 4 months now, we lives in two seperate countries. when we first met, we hit it off quite well and we got into a relationship after our second date. after a month together, we had to part ways physically due to our jobs. ever since then we have been keeping it long distance but we talk and facetime for serveral hours everyday.

we are both 29 years old, , even tho it might seem too hasty but we have been open regarding the thought of married. so we often talk about our future together, married, kids and stuff.

during our relationship i have noticed that she might have lied to me about her past

some of the doubt i have is that i have a feeling that she might have been married and divorced, and she might still be in touch with her ex bf or husband. but she denies all that and says she have cut them off and never been married.

as a couple, we have each others facebook password to create a better trust but in real never really used it, i do like to trust her but last night i couldnt help it and logged intro her facebook.

i saw 2 of her chats which really worries me.....

one chat was her ex... as i checked the msgs and dates, i could see that my gf added him, 2 months back which is 2 months intro our relationship, as i read i could see that she wanted to be friends with him and keep in contact. so i went and checked his profil out, and under his info, it saids, DIVORCED, i do not care that much about the past, but i was shocked that she lied to me.... alot of thought came intro my mind, i was wondering is she was using me as a stepping stone to get back with her ex in the future, the reason why they broke up or divorced? was that he had to focus on his studies to become a dentist and he had to move around and couldnt bring her with him. they broke up 2 years before she met me.

the second chat which worries me is a guy she is chatting with, a guy which is in a relationship, i can see in their chat that she have been telling him a lot of lies regarding infos about herself, but then the chat suddenly get sexual, they start talking about relationship, and she suddenly initiated asking questions about favorite sex positions and if he wanted to do it with her...

im like what the F.. i am in shock, i dont know how i should react..... as i can see she is the initiater in these conversations, i feel like im being played. i really dont know what to do really... any advice?

You're shocked that she lied? You've barely known this woman a hot second. Yes, you rushed the relationship, and now you're finding out she's a cheater and a con-artist. It is obvious that you need to end the relationship immediately and go no contact. Let her lie to and use someone else.

I'm sorry you're in this situation, but the writing is on the wall. Raise your standards, and leave this hot mess in the dust.

You don't even know this woman and are talking about marriage. I don't understand!

You don't know what to do! Of course you do.

She is also cheating on you with at least one other guy. Dude, raise your standards and end it. I also suggest finding someone local.

Well, look. The reality is you dated for a month. You don't know much about her, and you've created this entire fantasy in your head about getting married and so on. Just tell her that it was great knowing her and if she's ever back in your country again, tell her to drop you a line. But it's time for you to stop wasting your time on a fantasy and move on. You don't know what's going on with this girl.

This is why you don't get into a relationship with a stranger you knew almost nothing about. You still know almost nothing about her.

You are most certainly being played. Drop her and move on.

Getting into a relationship after two dates is nuts.

LDRs are difficult especially when there is too much too soon in terms of future talk, etc. Is there any plan to live in the same country? Is there a language or cultural difference? Perhaps her ex is divorced but not from her. It sounds like you barely know each other and that is why you are trying to find out through snooping through social media private messages.

Needing each other's passwords doesn't "build trust" it's a sign that there is no trust and that you want to police each other. Sorry but it seems doomed and you would be better off dating local women.

4 months now, we lives in two seperate countries. got into a relationship after our second date. we have each others facebook password to create a better trust. under his info, it saids, DIVORCED.

Firstly, i find it ludicrous that people give Facebook passwords to people they are dating. I think you should change your passwords

Secondly, her ex could have been divorced BEFORE he met her. Did you ever think of that possibility? And are you sure its her ex?

anyway -- i do think you jumped the gun with her