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Thread: Want him back

  1. #21
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    Thank you ! I am slowly recovering. Yes you are right. I should have never let him into my life. But first I did not think I would fall for him and when I did I thought he was serious with me. Stupid me I know. Yes I sent him text and an email but not out of desperation but because I now realize it's over and he is not going to be back. So might as well let him know my thoughts. Not what he cared but I felt better letting it out. Honestly I don't care if he is back which I know he is not. Even if by some magic chance he was I would think twice. Today I still feel a bit sad but nothing as before. Its been three months since I saw him and 6 weeks since the breakup. I keep reading about breakup withdrawal and I understand that feelings I experience is chemical reaction to addiction withdrawal.

  2. #22
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    SweetGirl28 it's amazing how our experience is so similar

  3. 07-04-2018, 02:10 PM

  4. #23
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    [QUOTE]
    Originally Posted by SweetGirl28
    Same guy maybe? Lol jk
    LOLOL

    Yes I am not going to contact him. I said everything I wanted. Plus he is ignoring me which is good. No insults is going to happen here. He avoids conflicts by just ignoring them LOL

    You seem like a good person who cares too much! Keep that beautiful heart, but get tougher and watch things get better for you! I just learned being too caring is a curse lol. Be cautious of who you give yourself too.
    Thank you for your kind words. I do get attached deeply. Funny enough I am not even mad at him for anything, and I just wanted to close it peacefully so I feel good about how it ended. I dont want him to have any hard feelings for me either. Its just did not work out but its all good :)

  5. #24
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    Yeah and BTW today is back to day 1 of NC which went well. I still think of him but more now trying to analyze the relationship and actually finding some bad sides of it now LOL. I ask my friend to text me bad things about him and it helps too. There are a couple of things he hid from me and was not completely truthful about other few things which I ignored but should not. So focusing on that instead to bring my mind to the right state and tell myself how blind and stupid I was. But on the other hand good thoughts creeping in too when he seemed so pure and said things I thought were from his heart. Ugh. He is such a snake after all. I need to focus more on his actions, not words

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  7. 07-04-2018, 06:37 PM

  8. #25
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    Yes so true about the song
    I am actually thankful for his time in my life. Maybe I should not have to but I did wrote him about how I felt in our relationship . I felt like I had to so he knows I left not because I did not love him but for other reasons. Again, not what he cares but I wanted him to know. I told him he was my best yet which is true. I dont know how in the world I fell so deep for him. I said I accept the fact he is not into me anymore and I just let it go and move on. He did not care a bit LOL

  9. 07-04-2018, 07:06 PM

  10. #26
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    I do appreciate any advice. Its just when I posted here a few days ago I thought I would do it to try to get him back. In this case contacting him would be wrong move. But as days go by I realize he moved on and I don't want to chase something what is out of reach to disappoint myself at the end. He is gone and I am OK with it. It still hurts, I still love him I wont lie. Maybe even more because I initiated it realizing the relationship not going anywhere. But at the end I realize it was the right decision because its better do it now than later on when I would get attached even deeper if its even possible to go any deeper than it is.
    As for him caring, I hope he does. I hope he will experience some sadness and feelings he lost something that meant something to him. I wont hold my breath but it is a nice thought to entertain
    And yes I am slowly getting back to my usual life. It is sure not that exciting without him in it. But it will get better. I am not ready for any relationship anytime soon I dont think. But I will try dating to get my mind off him. And you are so right about acceptance. When you fully accept the fact and stop fighting you feel so in piece with yourself. I have experienced it before and hope it will come soon to me

  11. 07-04-2018, 07:41 PM

  12. #27
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    Yes I know. I went on a few dates and it was awful. You cant help but keep comparing. And of course no one is good enough in my eyes after him.

    Right! No chasing. Just go off his radar. It's said it takes men on average 4 months to really feel a loss.
    I know sometimes men are funny. About two years ago I met a guy and we just mostly texted. He was fun and we clicked right away. He cracked me up all the time. But the dating was impossible as he lived on the other side of the city and his schedule was crazy (he was a cop). So I kinnda stopped texting him after awhile. He reached a few more times and also stopped. I deleted his contact and forgot about him. There was no feelings involved at all. Then in a year I received a text from him checking on me LOL. I did not even know who it was because I did not have his number but he kept mine? LOL. Anyways it did not go anywhere but the point is men can be back in time. It happened to me before. Not what I want it to happen in my case but curios if he ever reach me in a future.

  13. #28
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    Also I dont think he is going to sit there and wait to feel loss for 4 months haha. He is handsome, has successful career, drives a very nice car, very polite, charming, clean etc. He can have any woman he wants. If he had 3 gf in a short period before me he can replace me in a matter of days if not already. Would be nice to think he misses me but I think he moved on very quickly

  14. 07-04-2018, 10:51 PM

  15. #29
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    [QUOTE=SweetGirl28;7019869]
    I swear we dated the same man! Lol
    LOLOL Too funny

    I am not trying to defend him but he was (still is???) in the long term relationship for 15 years. I know that for sure because I have access at work to his info. Another question is though, you live with a woman for 15 years and you dont want to marry her? He did tell me he wanted committed relationship but he said many other things too. To be honest with his type of personality its hard to get into his head. I never had a clear picture of what exactly he wanted. He talks evasively , never a direct answer to a question he does not want to answer, always very careful with what he says, mixed messages etc. Its funny how I realize with my brain there has always been something odd but I chose to close my eyes on many things. Maybe in a couple of weeks I will start seeing something else

  16. 07-05-2018, 12:09 AM

  17. #30
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    I think mine was / is dating while still with his gf too. At least yours was honest about it, mine wasnt. I just dont know why. I am sure he could find someone who would not care if he is single or not. But maybe it would not be as romantic for him as being in "relationship". Who knows. I dont know for sure if they are still together, I am just guessing given some other factors. He said they "grew apart" but he never let me in into his place. That means she is there, right? I know I am stupid, but he said it was not the right time and blah blah. And at the same time he was always available from early morning to late night, so I believed he was single. Otherwise I could not see how he would stay in touch with me . Although when I think further about it, there could be that she was away for a few months, like business trip or whatever, there could be temporary break up between them, or maybe they are in open relationship, who knows. I have a friend who is married and has several lovers and her husband is totally fine with it. lol

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