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Feeling emotionless again


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Anyone whose read my previous posts will know my relationship was rocky and very toxic. Here’s a little story from today...

 

Today he managed to contact me (through a form of social media I didn’t know he had) and I’ve spiralled backwards. We’ve been on and off since end of March and we’re together 7 months seeing each other for another 2.

 

I officially ended it 3 weeks ago but I’ve bumped into him and he’s messaged me within that time. We did love each other but we DONT work together. I had my necklace at his and I asked to collect and he said he would drop it round. He will collect his jumper as well, however he then said he will drop it whilst I was working. Obviously he didn’t... so he asked me to come and get it so I said I would. He then proceeded to tell me not to when his dad is at home, and I said no I want it over and done with and he was just being a awkward di** about it, so I said ill get it myself and hung up and there’s been no contact since. I went and got it after work as he wasn’t home and now there’s silence. He doesn’t know I’ve been round to get it but it’ll probably infuriate him once he finds out.

 

I’ve also got the house to myself for a week so it’s qhite lonely as it is. How do I keep going mentally.im so numb, I cried at work today but other than that I feel pretty ok. Have group training at the gym too so will be occupied for an hour.

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Yeah, give him back everything, get back everything and stop contacting him and block him. Then keep distracting yourself through exercise, walking, hanging out with friends, going to events, and just doing things that basically please you and make you feel better. No more back and firth. You only hurt yourself more.

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Little update: I went to the gym, didn’t even think of him once. He text me saying he was going to get it after, then changed his tone and said ‘I’ll collect it another day.’ I still didn’t reply to him at this point.

 

Then he changed his tune AGAIN and he said he wants it and I said I already have my necklace and he asked me to go and take his jumper. Bearing in mind I got my necklace it was only fair he collected his jumper. I didn’t want to see him at all whilst I’m feeling strong.

 

In the end he text me telling me he’s ‘coming now’ and I took the jumper outside and he probably would’ve collected it by now. I’m currently having a cigarette outside distracting myself.

 

Wow this is hard haha.

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He messaged me ‘you can keep the bag thanks 😊’ sarcasm? Lol

 

Does it matter? Keeping yourself in the cycle of confusion means you haven't even begun to heal yet you're just going through the emotional pangs that occur in toxic relationships. I've been there and those pangs are quite different than the process of moving on.

 

So please recognize this. You haven't begun to heal yet. You have to actually go NC first. You're on the right track, I'm glad the final exchange happened. Now prepare yourself to go fully NC, I am happy you got your stuff back.

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Does it matter? Keeping yourself in the cycle of confusion means you haven't even begun to heal yet you're just going through the emotional pangs that occur in toxic relationships. I've been there and those pangs are quite different than the process of moving on.

 

So please recognize this. You haven't begun to heal yet. You have to actually go NC first. You're on the right track, I'm glad the final exchange happened. Now prepare yourself to go fully NC, I am happy you got your stuff back.

 

I agree except I don't think this is the "final" exchange. Not by a long shot.

 

This insanity will keep going until Kimbles no longer allows it to keep going (by either choosing to not respond or blocking).

 

Kimbles, I don't think these exchanges have anything to do with his stuff or your stuff; the "stuff" is an excuse - his way of keeping this going.

 

He's not ready to fully let go yet, and prefers keeping you dangling until HE's ready to make the full break (emotionally).

 

If you're serious about moving on (for good and forever), I would suggest going no contact before that happens, preferably blocking.

 

Best of luck.

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He was messaging me through another twitter account i didn’t know he had. I never contacted him. He reminded me I had my necklace at his, which is what my nan bought me. I assumed it had gone missing. When I say text I mean general conversation not necessarily thrpugh text.

I’ve blocked him straight away on his twitter account as soon as I had got my necklace back. I’m not interested in talking to him at all.

 

I know it’s bad that’s why I walked away for good a few weeks ago. First time I had heard from him since then... I go through up and down phases. It sucks.

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