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Thread: An ex and Pregancy

  1. #1

    An ex and Pregancy

    I wanted to know should I ever tell my ex that I had an abortion . I had found out that I was pregnant and I gave him a paper from the doctor he took it and hours later he balled it up and said don't put his name on nothing until I found out that it was his. Well I got rid of it and I feel good about my decision. Well anyways I saw him with a new girl at the park and he packed up and left when he saw me. It was crazy. I wanted to know if I should say something or make his ass sweat since he did me wrong. I feel ok with it . He has a tendency to stop talking to me and then months later start talking to me again. well not this time. We been in and out of this mess for 11 years. I need advice..help

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Snny's Avatar
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    He deserves the right to know. He could be preparing to pay for child support in case paternity tests pointed to him. You owe him that truth so he can also move on with his life.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
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    That's next level petty right there.

  4. 06-20-2018, 10:59 AM

  5. #4
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    You need to never talk to him again. You got rid of “it” (ugh I hate the way you worded that) and from the sounds of it he didn’t care either way, and as another poster said I highly doubt he was preparing to pay for child support. You’re just looking for a way to open contact back up. Leave him alone

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  7. #5
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    Don't tell him anything. What's the point.

    I hope that you have blocked and deleted him? After 11 years of back and forth, I hope you can now see that this will never work. Stop the drama.

  8. #6
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    Interesting replies... I disagree!

    Regardless of your feelings for him, or his feelings for the baby, or how he treated you, he has the right to know, IMO. These types of things have a way of niggling in the back of people’s minds for years or even decades - and it was half him.

    I say - take 30 seconds to send the text and THEN close the door forever. Just don’t engage in a big conversation about it. Simply “FYI - I had an abortion”. Done.

    You never regret taking the high road and personally, I think NOT telling him is practically begging him to come back at some point and ask...

  9. #7
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    Originally Posted by RedDress
    Interesting replies... I disagree!

    Regardless of your feelings for him, or his feelings for the baby, or how he treated you, he has the right to know, IMO. These types of things have a way of niggling in the back of people’s minds for years or even decades - and it was half him.

    I say - take 30 seconds to send the text and THEN close the door forever. Just don’t engage in a big conversation about it. Simply “FYI - I had an abortion”. Done.

    You never regret taking the high road and personally, I think NOT telling him is practically begging him to come back at some point and ask...
    She is only doing it to reestablish contact. This has nothing to do with a "high road" or she would have told him before the abortion.

  10. 06-20-2018, 11:45 AM

  11. #8
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    Originally Posted by Hollyj
    She is only doing it to reestablish contact. This has nothing to do with a "high road" or she would have told him before the abortion.
    Touché! I agree that ideally it should have been before the abortion.

  12. #9
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    Originally Posted by SweetGirl28
    That's not really something that should be written in a text. Plus he can screenshot it and send it all over, or forward it to people as revenge. Best to keep quiet because he obviously does not care for her, and she just wants to play head games.
    I agree a text is not ideal - but it’s better than nothing, IMO. And really - if he screenshots it and sends it all over, who cares? It’s the truth and as long as it’s short and to the point, there’s not much to gossip about.

    I’m not a fan of using this type of info for head games but I do still think he has a right to know, though.

  13. #10
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear this. You have been with him 11 years? What paper from a doctor did you present him? Go no constant and pull your self respect together. You won't "make him sweat" because as he said, you can't prove it's his and he's moved on and focusing on that. You should also. Now is the time to block and delete him from everything and stop going back for more of this disrespect. You'll never keep a man with a pregnancy, sorry.
    Originally Posted by Louiseware
    I had found out that I was pregnant and I gave him a paper from the doctor he took it and hours later he balled it up and said don't put his name on nothing until I found out that it was his.

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