How to break up with a rebound?

Hey guys. This summer i broke up with my 2yo relationship girlfriend.

Time has passed and nearly three of months ago I met someone via tinder, and after a couple weeks after we met, and at the second date we had sex. I thought it would end there but eventually we found out to have somethings in common. Problem is, after almost three months of dating I think I'm still not ready to be in another relationship. I don't feel it, I feel that there's something missing, and I'm simply not feeling it now with this girl, I think I should break up with her, but since I've been on the dumpee's side before, I don't know what to do or how to do it, I care about this girl but I don't think i love her. I think she's only a rebound, someone I turned to to stop thinking about my ex or to get my mind off of things.

What is your advice? How do I break up with someone? I want it to be as painless as possible(for her), she doesn't deserve someone who's not fully invested in the relationship.

You haven been dumped recently I respect the fact that you are hesitating doing the same to someone else.

But what choice do you have?

Just be honest. Tell her what you just shared with us.

It will hurt no matter what, but if she is grounded enough she will understand that you went into this with the best of intentions and unfortunately you now realize you were not ready. Apologize. Stress that it has nothing to do with her or who she is, but everything to do with timing.

That's about all you can do.

You haven been dumped recently I respect the fact that you are hesitating doing the same to someone else.

But what choice do you have?

 

Just be honest. Tell her what you just shared with us.

 

It will hurt no matter what, but if she is grounded enough she will understand that you went into this with the best of intentions and unfortunately you now realize you were not ready. Apologize. Stress that it has nothing to do with her or who she is, but everything to do with timing.

 

That's about all you can do.

I agree 100%

Agreed. Great advice :)

Yup, just be totally honest. I used to have a terrible tendency of wanting to lessen people's pain, especially in situations like this. But by not being straightforward, I was inherently being dishonest, even by being evasive/hedging.

It is absolutely okay to hurt someone by telling the truth. You remain confused, your feelings are a bit wobbly, not quite there. In other words, you are a human being. You are showing her respect by owning that and being responsible for yourself. It will sting, but it will be respectful.