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Thread: Iím pretty sure one of my bosses has feelings for me

  1. #1

    Iím pretty sure one of my bosses has feelings for me

    Iíve had a gut feeling about it for a while. But for many reasons, it would be risky for him to be more forward about his attraction. For one, Iím currently in a relationship. Iím not happy in this relationship, though and I plan on breaking it off soon. Itís actually a subject my boss and I have talked about before and heís asked me since if Iíve gone through with the break up yet. On top of that, the person Iím currently seeing is a female. For a while Iíve thought I was a lesbian, but I definitely have feelings for my male boss. So he thinks Iím totally not interested in him. And heís my boss, so a relationship between us would be inappropriate.
    Iím hoping once I break up with my girlfriend Iíll get a more clear signal from him, but Iím worried he wonít ever realize I like him too. And I donít want to come on too strong in case heís totally against dating someone he works with. I personally think we could make it work, but itís a messy thing to do.
    Once Iím single, how can I let him know Iím interested without making a fool of myself? I feel like since he thinks Iím a lesbian itís going to take a really obvious signal to let him know. Would it be too forward if I casually mentioned something about possibly being bisexual or saying that I want to try men out for a change?

  2. #2
    Platinum Member maew's Avatar
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    Help me understand... you believe that dating your boss would be messy (it absolutely would be)... and that a relationship would be inappropriate... so why do you want to move forward with this?

    You are setting yourself up for heartbreak and possibly losing your job if it doesnít work out.

    And if he isnít interested, you are setting yourself up to make this an uber awkward situation at your workplace.

    Not to mention you are still in a relationship.

    If anything is messy and inappropriate right now itís your thoughts and actions about this situation.

    Consider getting yourself sorted out before you make a move on anyone, nevermind your boss.

  3. #3
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    Dating your boss is always a bad idea. Keep in mind that if you break up with your boss, you're probably out of a job. But if you want to go ahead, I don't think you need to have a "talk" with him. He'll probably make a move on his own once he finds out you're free. Or you simply could say, I'm feeling, sad, how about taking me out to cheer me up? If he's single himself, he'll probably get the message.

  4. #4
    Gold Member Johnny Utah's Avatar
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    This is messy.

    Break up and be single for a long while. Don't think about this. You need enough space for a good while to consider everything and have a clear head when you decide if your job is worth this possible relationship.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    It would be best to stop string your gf along. Also talking behind her back to your boss lacks courage. It's unfortunate you have a crush on the boss, that would be a mess and he would be a fool to go there.

    Why not explore your sexuality, etc without stringing your partner along and without coming on to your boss..
    Originally Posted by Kristie89
    Iím currently in a relationship. Iím not happy in this relationship, though and I plan on breaking it off soon. Itís actually a subject my boss and I have talked about. Iíve thought I was a lesbian, but I definitely have feelings for my male boss.


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