Pregnancy risk?

Hi, all!

I feel weird asking this as 34 year old who should know better, but what is the risk of impregnation when the woman is on the pill (but also taking antibiotics) and the withdrawal method is used?

I did a bad thing and participated in an affair (she's married [i know it doesn't make it any better]) . We were only intimate twice and didn't use protection the first time and only part way through the second time (the first part).

She's 5 or so days late for her period, but almost to the day she was due for it, she had told her husband about the affair and has been really stressed out about it.

I know stress can cause late/missed periods, but I'm really worried that she's pregnant.

The first time we were intimate was almost two weeks ago, exactly, and the second time was 5/3. She and her husband had sex ~4 weeks ago, but he came in her.

I'm freaking out.

Oh, boy. Yeah antibiotics can lessen the effectiveness of the Pill. She can take a pregnancy test in a couple of days and see.

Not a weird question at all.

what is the risk of impregnation when the woman is on the pill (but also taking antibiotics) and the withdrawal method is used?

I don’t mean to scare you, but you need this knowledge:

I got pregnant on the withdrawal method the first time. I was 32 when it happened. Withdrawal method is the least effective pregnancy prevention method, not sure why you’d do it with someone who’s already married.

Antibiotics WILL lessen the effect of birth control.

Highly recommend she takes morning after pill now.

Stay the hell away from married people. Keep it in your pants. Period. This part you definitely knew better:

She better do a DNA test on the baby (if plans on keeping it) to make sure who the real father is.

Yeah, you messed up big time.

EDIT: she can only take the morning after pill within three days after intercourse. Right now, it’s too late.

Not a weird question at all.

 

 

I don’t mean to scare you, but you need this knowledge:

 

I got pregnant on the withdrawal method the first time. I was 32 when it happened. Withdrawal method is the least effective pregnancy prevention method, not sure why you’d do it with someone who’s already married.

 

Antibiotics WILL lessen the effect of birth control.

 

Highly recommend she takes morning after pill now.

 

Stay the hell away from married people. Keep it in your pants. Period. This part you definitely knew better:

 

She better do a DNA test on the baby (if plans on keeping it) to make sure who the real father is.

 

Yeah, you messed up big time.

 

EDIT: she can only take the morning after pill within three days after intercourse. Right now, it’s too late.

I know I messed up :( I have no justification other than someone really wanted me for the first time in almost a decade :(

I should have thought about what I was doing, before I did it. I just hope I don't have to pay a long-term price for it.

If you gave me $100 and brought me to a casino to bet on “pregnant” or “not pregnant”, my money would go on “not pregnant”.

There is about a 15-20% chance of getting someone pregnant with completely unprotected sex, finishing inside her, the whole nine yards.

Reduce that number a bit (but not much) because she was on the pill and antibiotics. Antibiotics can certainly mess with the effectiveness of the pill but it can also depend on the antibiotics. It can - but doesn’t necessarily - render the pill null and void.

Reduce that number a bit more because you used the pull out method. The pull out method is not very effective, but it’s not completely ineffective. It’s slightly better than nothing.

So... my money would go on “not pregnant”.

... but, of course, that’s certainly not to say it’s impossible. It’s definitely possible. And the fact that she’s late is not good.

... but statistically, the odds are in your favor, if that makes you feel a bit better.

Hopefully not, what a mess that would be!

Other than that, you're both equally responsible for the use of birth control. In this day and age there are no excuses for going without protection, especially as adults at your age.

As the others have said, she could indeed be pregnant.

Yes, stress could be playing a role here in terms of her missed period. But so could the antibiotics and pull-out method, which make pregnancy more likely. All you can do is wait for her to take a test now.

Even if she is pregnant, there is also a chance the baby would be her husband's and not yours. So, if she is, a DNA test will be in order too.

There is about a 15-20% chance of getting someone pregnant with completely unprotected sex, finishing inside her, the whole nine yards.

Wow nooo, the withdrawal method alone has a 50% chance of pregnancy, according to credible sources. The situation you described here should be higher than 50% chance of pregnancy. I don't know where you got this from, unless if you're talking about a person with fertility issues in the mix.

Since she is late on her period, and the pill should be regulating her period if taken correctly, then she should get a pregnancy test STAT. It is likely she is pregnant, if she has a history of regular periods. There's a chance it could be stress or poor dietary habits, but who knows for sure until a test is taken.

There is about a 15-20% chance of getting someone pregnant with completely unprotected sex, finishing inside her, the whole nine yards.

Yeah, no. Didn’t happen with me, even for a woman above the age of 30 who’s slowing down on her fertility rate. The risk is still there. And as mentioned, it is the LEAST protective method against pregnancy. Google the statistics on it and the percentage of pregnancy is way higher than what you’re stating.

Even if she is pregnant, there is also a chance the baby would be her husband's and not yours.

I wouldn’t count this. She may not have been on the antibiotics while she was having sex with her husband. Her husband would have knowlege when she was ill and taking the medication (hence why the last time they had sex was 4 weeks ago). Again, she needs to get tested for pregnancy AND possibly a DNA test on the baby to determine who the father is.

My friend's friend got pregnant in this way. Claimed she didn't know. This woman knew I am sure -it's even more common knowledge these days than 25 years ago from what I hear. You said you are 34 -how old is she? I got pregnant at almost 42, naturally (without any protection!).

Agree. This is a 2 way street, particularly the fact that she is concurrently sexually active with her husband.

you're both equally responsible for the use of birth control.

The best idea right now is she gets a pregnancy test. That's more important than asking us what the odds are. I hope you've learned from this!

Personally been with a couple different women who played it fast and loose with their birth control, so I'd never forego a rubber myself. Only way to be sure of something is to take responsibility for it yourself. You're not there over her shoulder making sure she's taking her pill regularly and properly and taking into account other medications in order to achieve peak effectiveness (as well you shouldn't be), so fact is you have no idea whether it's 50% or 99.6%.

RedDress isn't completely off-base in that, if considering a random act of ejaculating into a vagina, you're much less likely to get someone pregnant than people think, though likely enough to where babies conceived on a first try aren't exactly unicorns. Now, when you're talking bringing a new life into the world, "less likely" doesn't mean it's to be taken less lightly. You wouldn't use a parachute that had a 25% chance to fail.

Late on period obviously isn't a good sign, though. Sorry you're freaking out, but reality is what it is, and you'd be best to resign yourself to any possibility. Of course, if push comes to shove, you'll definitely want to have a paternity test done.

There are studies that show there is no sperm in preejaculate fluid, other studies YES, there is(some live, dead or immobile) - Whether it be residual from an earlier ejaculation or whether sperm leaks into the pre ejaculate fluid(and in some men, this can happen routinely!). In a nutshell, yes there's a risk, there are no concrete numbers anyone can really give you about that and you can't possibly know if you're one of the leakers.

Here's an interesting thing about antibiotics and birth control - Pretty much every antibiotic comes with the warning about it decreasing the effectiveness of hormonal BC. There's actually very little evidence that the broad spectrum antibiotics interfere and make the BC less effective(with the exception of rifampicin and some antifungals). https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/birth-control/in-depth/birth-control-pill/art-20045136?pg=2 There are plenty of studies floating around about it.

Even so, there's no 100% hard evidence her body is protected from the possibility of pregnancy.

What's better than freaking out is her taking a pregnancy test. At 5 days late, why she hasn't already is a mystery to me. I have an IUD, use condoms and still test around the time my period is due just to ease my mind.

I hear you can get a free DNA test on Maury Povich show. Even do the "not your father" dance if everything goes ok.

Wow nooo, the withdrawal method alone has a 50% chance of pregnancy, according to credible sources. The situation you described here should be higher than 50% chance of pregnancy. I don't know where you got this from, unless if you're talking about a person with fertility issues in the mix..

Nope. The odds of getting pregnant in any given month when not using contraception (and trying!) is about 20%. You can look it up on WebMD (or other sources if you prefer)

I think the 50% stat that you quote is if you use the withdrawal method over the period of a year.

Just because odds are "low" doesn't mean it didn't happen, especially in light of the late period.

My daughter is the result of the pull out method. So was my first pregnancy.

OP, are you prepared to co-parent if she is pregnant and you are determined to be the father?

Nope. The odds of getting pregnant in any given month when not using contraception (and trying!) is about 20%. You can look it up on WebMD (or other sources if you prefer)

 

I think the 50% stat that you quote is if you use the withdrawal method over the period of a year.

It would seem 20% is about correct, when ONLY using the withdrawal method the "typical" way. My original point was that using no method is much higher than 50%, which is indicated as a 85% chance of pregnancy instead of what you claim at 20%:

https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/rr6304a5.htm

While I would not be using WebMD as a credible, peer reviewed source for health information, I looked further into the withdrawal method and the ~50% statistic is in fact related to sexual activity over the span of a year. I received the original stats from a clinic's informational handout, given to me by my physician while considering BC options, who I can assume were playing it safe with the numbers.

However, the withdrawal method is not recommended because it is unreliable due to this:

"Coitus interruptus is unforgiving of incorrect use, and its effectiveness depends on the willingness and ability of the couple to use withdrawal with every act of intercourse"

https://www.cdc.gov/reproductivehealth/contraception/mmwr/mec/appendixh.html

It would seem 20% is about correct, when ONLY using the withdrawal method the "typical" way. My original point was that using no method is much higher than 50%, which is indicated as a 85% chance of pregnancy instead of what you claim at 20%: [\QUOTE]

 

That 85% stat is also over the course of a year.

 

In one month of unprotected sex, you have 20% chance of conceiving

Over 6 months of unprotected sex, you have 70% chance of conceiving

Over a year, you have 85% chance of conceiving

 

Think about it... it makes sense. If people got pregnant 85% of the time with having unprotected sex once, no one would ever “try” to have a baby (unless they had fertility issues). It normally (but doesn’t always) take a few months of trying.

 

Of course, you can absolutely get pregnant in one shot! But it’s not the norm.

That 85% stat is also over the course of a year.

 

In one month of unprotected sex, you have 20% chance of conceiving

Over 6 months of unprotected sex, you have 70% chance of conceiving

Over a year, you have 85% chance of conceiving

 

Think about it... it makes sense. If people got pregnant 85% of the time with having unprotected sex once, no one would ever “try” to have a baby (unless they had fertility issues). It normally (but doesn’t always) take a few months of trying.

 

Of course, you can absolutely get pregnant in one shot! But it’s not the norm.

Huh, well wouldn't you know. You learn something new everyday! It didn't occur to me to read the disclsimer at the bottom because I thought it would state it on the table in that link. I read another source that defines the stats you state well:

"Conception is most likely to occur in the first month of trying (about a 30% conception rate). The chance then falls steadily to about 5% by the end of the first year. Cumulative conception rates are around 75% after six months, 90% after a year, and 95% at two years" (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC188498/)

How interesting. It is averaged, but makes a better prediction. However, a missed regular period cycle would be worrying regardless since I use the pill and am never late, hence never pregnant haha.

What is concerning isn't the statistics, but the fact that her period is late.

Perrin, I really hope you've learned to make better decisions. Having unprotected sex with a married woman because you haven't had any in a while has resulted in a ton of stress and anxiety, not to mention the possibility of having to co-parent with this woman AND her husband (assuming he doesn't toss her out).

What is concerning isn't the statistics, but the fact that her period is late.

 

Perrin, I really hope you've learned to make better decisions. Having unprotected sex with a married woman because you haven't had any in a while has resulted in a ton of stress and anxiety, not to mention the possibility of having to co-parent with this woman AND her husband (assuming he doesn't toss her out).

Yup.

"Play stupid games, win stupid prizes."

What is concerning isn't the statistics, but the fact that her period is late.

 

Perrin, I really hope you've learned to make better decisions. Having unprotected sex with a married woman because you haven't had any in a while has resulted in a ton of stress and anxiety, not to mention the possibility of having to co-parent with this woman AND her husband (assuming he doesn't toss her out).

Sure, but the OP asked a question involving the chances of her becoming pregnant. Don't know about you, but I like it when people answer the actual question asked in addition to stating his actions were not responsible. It is great to share such knowledge although, as mentioned in previous posts, the point you make was never lost in the majority of the responses, so not sure why you're stating what was already obvious:

"However, a missed regular period cycle would be worrying regardless since I use the pill and am never late, hence never pregnant haha."

No one can change the OP's behavior, besides he himself. He's received plenty on both sides now (chastising and knowledge), so it's up to him on making better decisions.

Sure, but the OP asked a question involving the chances of her becoming pregnant. Don't know about you, but I like it when people answer the actual question asked in addition to stating his actions were not responsible. It is great to share such knowledge although, as mentioned in previous posts, the point you make was never lost in the majority of the responses, so not sure why you're stating what was already obvious:

 

"However, a missed regular period cycle would be worrying regardless since I use the pill and am never late, hence never pregnant haha."

 

No one can change the OP's behavior, besides he himself. He's received plenty on both sides now (chastising and knowledge), so it's up to him on making better decisions.

My sense is the OP asked that question because he wasn't ready to face the relevant question. And given that, IMO, it's fine to respond to what he's afraid to ask especially when we're talking about a potential baby carried by someone he had an affair with - at some point that becomes far more important -from the child's perspective -than statistics.

My sense is the OP asked that question because he wasn't ready to face the relevant question. And given that, IMO, it's fine to respond to what he's afraid to ask especially when we're talking about a potential baby carried by someone he had an affair with - at some point that becomes far more important -from the child's perspective -than statistics.

Again, sure. It has already been clear and not sure why others are against stating accurate information, while deeming other information more important than others. Really, he should get it by now. It's been said and done, hammered home, and it wasn't even what he asked. He needed to hear his actions were wreckless, but as long as he read the posts, then it should be redundant at this point, in which this thread will inevitably close.

Methinks the opposition is because the facts could slightly undermine the agrument of he should be more careful, since it seems low. Which, it shouldn't. They are averaged percentages, aka probability. In actuality, it states an important question: would you leave it up to chance to become a father? I would like to imagine it would be a no, but no one knows.

Public health awareness programs strive to change the perception of others via warning them of the probablility of unwanted outcomes and is effective in positively changing behavior in many cases, rather than opinions. This is no different. Opinions can pursuade someone's actions, but awareness arms a person with the knowledge to make more informative decisions for themselves.

I like to compare this to getting a medical procedure done. Of course this isn't a direct comparison, but indirectly relatable. Say you want to get plastic surgery. You are told generally there are risks involved. The person says nonchalantly they'll be fine, but then the doctor tells you, you have 20% chance you can be deformed (or insert consequence of your choosing) from the procedure. It makes a person think twice about the consequences because it is all the more real to them.