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Thread: Journey of a Broken Soul

  1. #21
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    Apr 2018
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    Today is a day when my thoughts are preoccupying my brain and although Im fighting against them (the bad ones), they are still emerging to the surface.
    I feel like my logic and my gut are in a war. My brain is telling me one thing, while my intuition is screaming another.
    What should I listen?
    Someone told me that this gut feeling will go away. Its been over 4 months and it didnt go away.
    And yes, i would think that i have the feeling because the way I think, but honestly I think completely opposite of what i feel and its still there.

    Can a person go crazy if there is such a battle within?

  2. #22
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    Apr 2018
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    Oh wow!
    Today I came across our old conversations.
    And I've realized something.
    IT WASN'T ALL YOU!
    It was me, too!

    You were right. I changed so much after I came back home.
    To every +, I throw 5 -'s to you!
    To every try, I put us down.

    I am sorry.
    I am soooo sorry.
    That is not me.
    That was never me!
    I know now.

  3. #23
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    Apr 2018
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    I am glad I had the opportunity to tell you I'm sorry for my part.
    It put my soul at ease.
    I feel less burdened now.
    Thank you for listening.
    Thank you for saying a sincere "Im sorry, too".

    I still dont know how to move on without you, but Im not fighting my feelings anymore.
    Day by day, and we will see what will happen.
    I just know I have to keep my head up, and keep pushing until something good comes to me.

  4. #24
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    In a month it will be exactly two years since we lost us. Where did the time go?

    The pain is gone. Not completely, it still finds its way to crawl back to my mind. But there are definitely more good days than bad.

    My soul still feels empty.
    I cannot seem to connect to anyone.
    I met couple of interesting men, but at the end never connected to them in a way I need/want.
    Maybe its me, not letting myself to fall for someone, maybe it just wasnt meant to be.
    I dont know anymore.

    I did come to a realization couple of weeks ago that I am afraid of loving because I dont want to lose myself to someone ever again.
    Im scared I'll end up alone.
    I really am.
    But Im working on it.
    Beacuse I know it's on me.

    So much has changed in my life.
    Im better.
    I love myself again.
    I love my life.
    Im strong.
    I stand tall.

    But, two years later I still feel peace only when I see you holding me in your arms. This is only in my third eye.
    It has been NC for months now.
    Havent seen you in over 6 months.
    You proved again that you are thinking only about yourself.
    That helped me stop wishing you to come back.
    But the ambyss in my soul is still there.
    Something is missing. Something big.

  5.  

  6. #25
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    Apr 2018
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    I still love you.

    Damn it! I really still love you.

  7. #26
    Member NightFairy12's Avatar
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    May 2020
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    Originally Posted by Doosha
    I still love you.

    Damn it! I really still love you.
    What ended up happening with you two? Mine said similar things while breaking up with me “I love you but we’re just not compatible” I became the nitpicking insecure needy girlfriend towards the end of our relationship and realized there are things I need to work on with or without him. But I still love him to this day even though we are both n/c bc I can’t sit on the sideline and be just friends with him.

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