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Thread: Human Addiction.

  1. #11
    Platinum Member
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    I suggest you expand your social circle.

  2. #12
    Originally Posted by Batya33
    I don't think it's important to label this as an addiction - if it is. What's important is you made the choice to stop having sex with him or being involved with him. The rest is just details. If he's in the same public place as you it will be awkward but you have to keep a physical distance and don't "go there". As far as being attracted to available men yes, some therapy might help or some really good books on the subject. Good for you for leaving!
    Itís been difficult, but Iíve kept my distance.
    I actually completely avoided him in those situations. Ignoring him is something I didnít think I would ever do. Slow progress, I guess.

  3. #13
    Originally Posted by Hollyj
    If you wanted commitment, you would have bailed as soon as he told you he was incapable of commitment. You should be honest with yourself, if you want a future with anyone.
    Interesting point. I will have to look into that perspective. It makes sense that I would have turned around and left the moment I realized he couldnít give me what I wanted. I just assumed I fell for him so hard, that I kept a false hope.

  4. #14
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    Originally Posted by AmyBlue77
    Interesting point. I will have to look into that perspective. It makes sense that I would have turned around and left the moment I realized he couldnít give me what I wanted. I just assumed I fell for him so hard, that I kept a false hope.
    No. He told you what he was capable of. You had all of the info. He was safe for you, as he was unavailable.

    I strongly suggest therapy and baggagereclaim.com It will help you address you emotional unavailability. Helped me.

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  6. #15
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    Originally Posted by AmyBlue77
    Itís been difficult, but Iíve kept my distance.
    I actually completely avoided him in those situations. Ignoring him is something I didnít think I would ever do. Slow progress, I guess.
    Good for you for keeping your distance. Even if it took a while, itís good that youíre doing it now.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    He is preying on your vulnerabilities. He knows that he can use you for a good time but not promise anything more and that you are indeed addicted to it and will come crawling back.
    But what you're doing is allowing yourself to be a slave to this and won't be able to have a decent relationship that could be fulfilling and loving. You aren't giving that to yourself.
    You are still stuck on the cycle of wanting what you can't have.
    And yes, it can be addicting. You need to be stronger than it though and be reasonable. What does this man actually have to offer you? Does this man even respect you? Why are you so drawn to the drama of it instead of a good and loving committed relationship? Why are you addicted to the unattainable? Do you feel worthy of more?

    This comes down to something on the inside and you needing to ask yourself some serious questions. Therapy would help you uncover these answers.
    You have taken the step to posting on here because you know something is wrong. I hope you are strong enough to continue to find the answers so you will be done with this situation for good and will finally allow yourself some actual happiness with a man who wants to give you loyalty and commitment.
    Only you can change your path.

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