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Thread: Venting.. gay, nearly 30 and single

  1. #11
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
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    1,385
    Originally Posted by PragmaticLuv
    Lucha,

    I am in the exact same boat as you. EXACT SAME.

    I'm in my mid-thirties and gay and it's extremely frustrating. It's been a few years since my last real relationship, and I'm still not really over it because the dating world has been so bad, I always just go back to thinking about how easy it was with my ex.

    I've been ghosted, played, abused, lied to ... honestly you name it, it's happened to me in the past few years, mostly from online dating. It's gotten to the point where I tell my friends that I'd be less shocked to win the Powerball than to meet a girl and have it go well. All this leads to me thinking about my ex every single day and wishing it had been different.

    You're not doing anything wrong. The community of women is vastly wrong. It's horrible. Our dating pool isn't even a pool. It's a cesspool.
    Hi Pragmaticluv,

    Thanks for responding, makes me feel less alone somehow!

    I can still recall the day my ex walked out the room for the last time, I remember thinking there goes my only chance at true love. Of course that is bull, but here I am a few years and a handful of new exes later and I still havent found what Im looking for.

    Whats worse, it seems nearly everyone I even met in the gay community is now happily married or has kids. The only one not dating? Me. Awtch.

    What I do get is a lot of women Im totally not attractes to who seem to think after one or two online talks I am the woman of their dreams and quite agressively demand Id date them and wont take no for an answer. I also have a few exes in that same category.

    All I want is to love someone who loves me back, not hving to love someone who loves me - if that makes sense :-)

  2. #12
    Originally Posted by Lucha
    Hi Pragmaticluv,

    Thanks for responding, makes me feel less alone somehow!

    I can still recall the day my ex walked out the room for the last time, I remember thinking there goes my only chance at true love. Of course that is bull, but here I am a few years and a handful of new exes later and I still havent found what Im looking for.

    Whats worse, it seems nearly everyone I even met in the gay community is now happily married or has kids. The only one not dating? Me. Awtch.

    What I do get is a lot of women Im totally not attractes to who seem to think after one or two online talks I am the woman of their dreams and quite agressively demand Id date them and wont take no for an answer. I also have a few exes in that same category.

    All I want is to love someone who loves me back, not hving to love someone who loves me - if that makes sense :-)
    What I do is this: I'm just SUPER patient with the dating apps. Like I literally only swipe if I feel like I'd be SUPER into the girl. So maybe only once every month or so I get a match. And out of those, most of them end up flaking out, or turning out to be terrible, or what not. Every now and again something seems to click - I'm talking once a year, if that, and I roll with it. But even then, I've still yet to find the right person, so yes I know exactly what you're going through.

    The other day I signed up for an app that wanted referrals to friends, and that's when I realized that I seriously have very few single friends. So I'm with ya on that too. It's frustrating. But. I'm always hopeful deep down.

  3. #13
    Originally Posted by PragmaticLuv
    The community of women is vastly wrong. It's horrible. Our dating pool isn't even a pool. It's a cesspool.
    Haha, yeah.. Good quote! There is a cesspool element to it. Online is a cesspool in my opinion, hence why i avoid it.

    This is where knowing what you're about and what you're after is very important.

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