I need advise.

** I don’t know where else to put this and I apologize if this is the wrong spot**

Okay. So here it goes.

I’m 20 years old and I’ve been with my girlfriend for like 4 years. We’ve got a kid together she’s 14 months old. I moved over 600 miles to be with her. So I’m over 600 miles from my family. We’re currently living with her grandmother, my girls brother lives here too. We’re trying to get out on our own, but it’s been extremely hard. I need a job but I can’t get a job due to family issues, her aunt and cousin come around and start fights last time it got bad, I can’t come rushing home from work to pick my girl up and get her away from it. So unless I work extremely close and I’m talking like under 5 minutes I’m unable to get a job. The two closest gas stations are not hiring, and I just have no idea what to do. If I ever figure out a steady income and we’re able to move out we’ve gotta bring her grandma because she’s getting older, she can’t drive, she’s got like 4 dogs so we wouldn’t be able to get an apartment. And if we take her grandma with her brother is gonna want to come with because “he’s not ready to live with his girlfriend yet” he causes drama himself but there’s nothing we can do about that because he lives here. Anyway. I’m looking for suggestions. Any at all. Thanks for reading.

Move back closer to your family with your gf and daughter. Her family is not helping you in the slightest, they’re bringing you down. You’re not responsible for them. They’re responsible for their own lives. You need to get out of that situation, man up and get a job and support your family.

This is a ridiculous situation. Why can't your girlfriend just leave when your aunt and cousin come over and avoid fights? Take the baby for a walk or a drive. You need to get a job, move out, and leave her family where they are. You've got a kid to take care of. KB's suggestion is a good one. Move back to where your family is.

In this age of Uber, Lyft and bicycles, what, exactly, is your reason for not getting a job?

In this age of Uber, Lyft and bicycles, what, exactly, is your reason for not getting a job?

I live in the middle of nowhere in Alabama. We don’t have Uber or Lyft. And my car has 214k miles on it. I don’t think a job where I drive all over town is a good idea.

This is a ridiculous situation. Why can't your girlfriend just leave when your aunt and cousin come over and avoid fights? Take the baby for a walk or a drive. You need to get a job, move out, and leave her family where they are. You've got a kid to take care of. KB's suggestion is a good one. Move back to where your family is.

I’m the only one with a license and a car, if I’m at work she can’t take the baby for a drive, and walking isn’t an option they’ll just follow her.

Move back closer to your family with your gf and daughter. Her family is not helping you in the slightest, they’re bringing you down. You’re not responsible for them. They’re responsible for their own lives. You need to get out of that situation, man up and get a job and support your family.

It’s not as easy as “move back up with my family” I understand that I’m not responsible for them, but they start fights when we haven’t even done anything. If we tried to up and leave over 600 miles away there’s really gonna be a huge fight. I’m not trying to shoot down everyone’s suggestions but we’ve already thought about this one.

How are you currently supporting yourselves and the baby? Why did you two choose to live at her grandmas - does she help with the child care?

It’s not as easy as “move back up with my family” I understand that I’m not responsible for them, but they start fights when we haven’t even done anything. If we tried to up and leave over 600 miles away there’s really gonna be a huge fight. I’m not trying to shoot down everyone’s suggestions but we’ve already thought about this one.

It IS that easy. You need to get away from her family.

I live in the middle of nowhere in Alabama. We don’t have Uber or Lyft. And my car has 214k miles on it. I don’t think a job where I drive all over town is a good idea.

How were you planning on supporting this baby when you chose to live in the middle of nowhere? Not to sound harsh, but if you're responsible enough to make a baby, you should be responsible enough to have a job and put a roof over your head.

You can find a way, or you can find an excuse...

I live in the middle of nowhere in Alabama. We don’t have Uber or Lyft. And my car has 214k miles on it. I don’t think a job where I drive all over town is a good idea.

Driving to and from work is a foundational priority in anyone's life. If you can't manage working where you are, then GO to where the work is. Save up the money to either return to GF or have her and whoever move to you, but stagnating in a place where people resent you is the worst idea I can think of.

I'm sorry to hear about this difficult situation. I commend you for being supportive of your girlfriend and daughter, but if they are not in a healthy environment, that is of great concern to me. An extended family all living in the same location can be helpful if the family is supportive of each other, but that definitely does not seem to be the case if you feel that your daughter is in danger or constantly needs to "get away." Why does your girlfriend want to live near these family members so badly? Is there anyone else who can take care of her Grandma? And would your girlfriend consider moving to a new location with you for the health of your family? Praying for your situation.

How are you currently supporting yourselves and the baby? Why did you two choose to live at her grandmas - does she help with the child care?

My girlfriend get money every month her mom passed away. I mean her grandma buys her stuff.

How were you planning on supporting this baby when you chose to live in the middle of nowhere? Not to sound harsh, but if you're responsible enough to make a baby, you should be responsible enough to have a job and put a roof over your head.

 

You can find a way, or you can find an excuse...

When I say in the middle of nowhere I mean 20 minutes from the store. But even in town we don’t have Uber or anything like that. I’m thinking about doing overnight at Walmart.

I'm sorry to hear about this difficult situation. I commend you for being supportive of your girlfriend and daughter, but if they are not in a healthy environment, that is of great concern to me. An extended family all living in the same location can be helpful if the family is supportive of each other, but that definitely does not seem to be the case if you feel that your daughter is in danger or constantly needs to "get away." Why does your girlfriend want to live near these family members so badly? Is there anyone else who can take care of her Grandma? And would your girlfriend consider moving to a new location with you for the health of your family? Praying for your situation.

It’s not that she wants to, we’re basically stuck here until I can get a job so we can move out. There’s nobody else. We’ve thought of that. And we want to move to a different town, but don’t know if her grandma will. I’ll keep everyone posted on how the overnight Walmart thing goes I put an application in yesterday.

Good luck with the job. Yep you may have to save some money before you can get out of there.

we want to move to a different town, but don’t know if her grandma will. I’ll keep everyone posted on how the overnight Walmart thing goes I put an application in yesterday.

So far I haven’t heard anything. Gonna call about my application in the morning.

I live in the middle of nowhere in Alabama. We don’t have Uber or Lyft. And my car has 214k miles on it. I don’t think a job where I drive all over town is a good idea.

I live in alabama, Ga/AL border to be exact. There are ton's of jobs here that you could have. Long as you apply yourself and all you should be able to retain it. What I am actually hearing is that you don't want to do any of that. Sorry, a man who has a family that also has an infant child would do anything for that child. Be the man, move your family to where you can hold a job and where jobs are available. It's not that hard, you make the decision and execute. I just gave you some information as to where in general. If you want more information you can pm me and i will tell you exactly where.