Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 2 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 45

Thread: Is it strange to want to raise another family?

  1. #11
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    Posts
    102
    Originally Posted by tattoobunnie
    Based on your title, I thought you were gonna ask if it's weird to adopt a family, like having a mom, dad, and kids move in with you. You could also offer to babysit your grandkids more, take them on trips, so afterwards, you can send them back! My in-laws keep offering to take our eldest for a week. Can't wait! Ha!
    I do see them and spend time with them. it is different raising some vs visiting, I respect my Daughter and her Husband on how they want to raise their children and would never go against their wishes. But I have different beliefs More activity less video games and TV. My kids didn't get gaming consoles until they got part time jobs and bought their own. I support actual social interactions, playing sports, getting outside.

    LOL adopt a instant family lol, But on that topic I am not against being a step Dad, I have never felt that is a burden and love being a role model.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member Snny's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Posts
    6,376
    So the question is am I dumb for wanting a family at 44 and pretty much means dating someone up to 15 years younger? I rather mid 30ís a bit more grown up but we will see what the dice brings.
    Mid 30s would be a little late and risky to start having children. Some women get lucky and have no issues. Unfortunately there are numerous medical studies proving that there are higher risks of pregnancy complications for women who are 35+ (and I am one of these women within the age bracket experiencing that kind of pregnancy as we speak). Thereís also an increased risk of children born from late age pregnancies developing severe cognitive disabilities like autism, Down syndrome, etc. from women who give birth after 35. If you have a child with low incidence disabilities, that child will depend on you in your entire lifetime. You can be potentially stuck raising a 5-8 year old in an adult body because getting services for a child after the age of 18 is limited and challenging.

    For some people this is not a problem, but not everyone has the patience of raising a child with special needs. I work in the mental health field and cannot stress that raising a child with significant disabilities is a lifetime commitment. Are you ready to make that commitment if it does happen, knowing that you are nearing retirement?

    If you truly enjoy raising children, why not become a foster parent? Adopt?

  3. #13
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared
    Age
    52
    Posts
    36,675
    Gender
    Female
    You donít even need to be in a risk bracket to have a special needs child. I was 30 and my husband was 27 when our son was born and he has autism. Most likely he will be with us most of our life . And I had four miscarriages after my son . So I was done having children when I was 30 . I was also deemed high risk due to uterine damage from tumours and constant vomiting which contributed to 45 pound weight loss and my son was laying on my venous return to body so I was constantly passing out. I was on bed rest at 6 months.

    My mother was 19 when got pregnant with me and 20 when I was born . She actually almost died from that pregnancy . Pregnancy with my brother was much the same so she was done with having children at the age of 23 .

    However I do know many women who have had happy successful healthy pregnancies and children after the age of 40 . But that is much much harder .

    To ensure greater ability to have children you might have to pick somebody 30 or younger . But once you enter that generation pretty sure you wonít have the same values . And you have to agree on your methods of child raising or it wonít work .

  4. #14
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared
    Age
    52
    Posts
    36,675
    Gender
    Female
    But there are studies showing that autism in some part relates to having an older father .

  5.  

  6. #15
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    Posts
    102
    just for the record my son has Autism I understand the risks. I am educated on that topic that is why I was mentioning early 30's

  7. #16
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    Posts
    102
    Originally Posted by ~Seraphim ~
    But there are studies showing that autism in some part relates to having an older father .
    So when I was 22 years old and my ex was 23 it was because I was older with my son having a IQ of 76 AND will never live on his own? he was diagnosed with autism at 4.

    Don't believe everything you read.

  8. #17
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared
    Age
    52
    Posts
    36,675
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by Lost 73
    So when I was 22 years old and my ex was 23 it was because I was older with my son having a IQ of 76 AND will never live on his own? he was diagnosed with autism at 4.

    Don't believe everything you read.
    I know that. I have an autistic son also and we not high risk category.

  9. #18
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared
    Age
    52
    Posts
    36,675
    Gender
    Female
    But older genetic material does generally have greater issues.

  10. #19
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    Posts
    102
    Originally Posted by ~Seraphim ~
    But older genetic material does generally have greater issues.
    Calling me old? guess I am lol I get it. Got tested last year due to wanting to freeze some just in case and I am still all good in that area. Like I stated I am 44 turning 45 but I look and feel as if I am in my 30's I have aged very good. well my body has I think my mind stopped aging at 25 still a bit a Young guy there expect for my beliefs

  11. #20
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Posts
    11,797
    My former boss had a teenage daughter when he and his wife divorced.

    He deliberately dated a bit younger afterward because he was sure he wanted more children.

    He did end up remarrying and having two more children. When I was working with him he had his daughter in college and two preschool-age boys.

    So, not too terribly uncommon.

    PS: He was in his early 40s at the time I worked with him.

Page 2 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •