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Thread: People's Opinions on Porn in a Relationship?

  1. #1
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    People's Opinions on Porn in a Relationship?

    I feel like people are either okay with it and even watch it together or they think it's cheating. I guess I can see both standpoints. Boys will be boys and are sexual creatures, but then again how is it different if they watched two people having sex (live)? Or even if someone recorded themselves having sex with someone else, for them.

    What are your guys opinions?

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    I don't see any difference. Is that what happened to you? How do you feel about that? Do you trust your boyfriend?

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    I don't think it's cheating and I think it can be inconsistent with being in a committed relationship in certain situations. There's no set answer -depends on the couple, their values, their boundaries and of course what kind of porn is involved. I think communication is key between the couple to see what each person is comfortable with. I once went on a few dates with a guy who went to strip clubs with his clients. In his opinion getting a lap dance was not "sexual" and was appropriate. And I knew then that he would not be right for me because that would not be ok with me in a committed relationship.

    I don't agree that "boys will be boys" as far as acting on sexual urges. Whether you act on a sexual urge is a choice and under your control, whatever gender you are. I personally don't believe in excusing behavior and choices as "boys will be boys".

  4. #4
    Platinum Member katrina1980's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Sploosh79

    I feel like people are either okay with it and even watch it together ...
    I (and the men I have dated) fall into this category.


    Originally Posted by Sploosh79

    Boys will be boys and are sexual creatures.
    Yes and "girls will be girls" and are sexual creatures too!

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    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Porn watching and being addicted to watching porn are two different things. The former is okay in my books, the latter is a problem like any addiction is a problem.

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    Originally Posted by DanZee
    I don't see any difference. Is that what happened to you? How do you feel about that? Do you trust your boyfriend?
    Just a general question ☺

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    Originally Posted by katrina1980
    I (and the men I have dated) fall into this category.




    Yes and "girls will be girls" and are sexual creatures too!
    I agree girls are sexual creatures but from my experience men have a higher sex drive.

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    Originally Posted by Batya33
    I don't think it's cheating and I think it can be inconsistent with being in a committed relationship in certain situations. There's no set answer -depends on the couple, their values, their boundaries and of course what kind of porn is involved. I think communication is key between the couple to see what each person is comfortable with. I once went on a few dates with a guy who went to strip clubs with his clients. In his opinion getting a lap dance was not "sexual" and was appropriate. And I knew then that he would not be right for me because that would not be ok with me in a committed relationship.

    I don't agree that "boys will be boys" as far as acting on sexual urges. Whether you act on a sexual urge is a choice and under your control, whatever gender you are. I personally don't believe in excusing behavior and choices as "boys will be boys".
    I don't think all behavior should be excused, don't get me wrong. But I do think that, from my experience men are sexual creatures, and I feel most will watch porn no matter what.

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    Originally Posted by Sploosh79
    I agree girls are sexual creatures but from my experience men have a higher sex drive.
    Yes but sex drive has nothing to do with actions or behavior. People choose whether and when to act on sex drives -so even if you're right it has nothing to do with reacting by watching porn or any other behavior that has to do with sex. I don't happen to agree that men have a higher sex drive but even if I did to presume that having a higher sex drive means acting in a sexual way or doing sexual things more often is not something I agree with. Individual people choose how to react to all sorts of feelings including sexual ones.

  11. #10
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    My sex drive has been higher than about 50% of the men I've dated.

    IMO, porn is not "cheating".

    OP, did you ever find out for sure whether or not your boyfriend cheated on you?

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