We broke up

He refuses to drive up and would rather end things than compromise so I too said we're done. So much for a happy valentines day. I was working on a pros/cons list and the cons were winning anyway. He's not relationship material, at least not for me, with his refusal to compromise. I painted my nails, my mom is happy, I'm a little sad. Still working on my move out plan, was planning to myself and hoping to with him anyway.

I'm sorry hon. Stay focused on your plans! The right person will come along to complement those plans when the timing is right.

My sense is that your mindset is that you latch on to any guy who you find cute and who shows interest in you and can provide financially to an extent as well. I am a big fan of meeting and dating and in your situation you are a mom who hopes to reunite with her daughter, you are a person preparing to move out independently in the near future and you have significant financial issues to resolve. It's not to "focus on yourself" but rather to focus on the priorities right now -your daughter, your housing, your finances. You are not picking appropriate people for you because right now you have too much on your plate. Why not wait until you're back on your feet more?

My step dad before he died suggested I get out there and meet someone. He thought I was ready and deserved someone in my life.

My step dad before he died suggested I get out there and meet someone. He thought I was ready and deserved someone in my life.

Yes. Many people have opinions. You are an adult. It's fine to take others' opinions into account and you make your own decisions and you take responsibility for your own decisions. My parents seemed to want me to commit to someone many years before I did. They had big hearts and the best of intentions. Had I listened to them instead of to my heart I would have gotten a divorce instead of a broken engagement.

You can still go out and meet someone as your step-dad said, but it doesn't mean it has to be this particular boyfriend. The next guy will be better!

You already know Valentine's Day is overrated anyway. Have a nice time tonight with friends or in peaceful solitude regardless.

Agreed - go out and have fun tonight. This guy just did you a favor.

My step dad before he died suggested I get out there and meet someone. He thought I was ready and deserved someone in my life.

That's a Hallmark card, not deep advice. You deserve to be eventually in a good relationship, but you are too impulsive. Most people would not see it as a directive that they should just go out and grab the first person they see, but you do. I am sorry your stepdad passed away. Didn't they just marry very recently? I think i would take all the advice from previous threads and focus on working and your mental health so you can see your daughter again and eventually get more visitation and even join custody one day. The heck with guys. The only ones you will attract is people who are messed up or want to 'rescue' you until you get your life in order. Do not go on ANY date or communicate with any man online