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Thread: The Patch

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    If you aren't getting along to the point where you're not satisfied sexually, and if you're not okay with her having a close relationship with another guy, then why are you sticking around?

  2. #12
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Is this a LDR?
    Last edited by kamurj; 01-24-2018 at 08:29 AM.

  3. #13
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    No not long distance, but we do live 45 mins away. We still live with our parents. I am 24 and she is 22. I am American and she is filipino. She is definitely not meeting my needs sexually but she has in the past. We are in a very long dry spell. I think she is a prude but we used to do things a lot. I am sticking around because I know that we could have an amazing relationship and have in the past. She is so beautiful and has a good job and is a good girl. Iím sticking around because I do love her and I know she loves me too. I want to leave her but it will hurt her. Iíve already hurt her once before and now she has hurt me back. We have been ďtogetherĒ for nearly 4 years. I broke up with her and left for 7 weeks and then realized how bad I ed up and have tried getting her back ever since. We were going good but then got in another fight and thatís when the other guy came in the picture. She went to school with him. So they would see each other every day. She formed a relationship with him while still dragging me along without me knowing. I found out and was super hurt and things just havenít been the same since. That all happened 1 year ago and for the last year we have been still seeing each other and hanging out every weekend and working things out and traveling together and sleeping over and everything couples do but there is absolutely no more sex life. A whole year! Nothing! Not even a kiss. I bring this up to her nearly every day how much I struggle with this being friend zoned. I canít believe it. I make moves and just get denied every time. ďShe isnít readyĒ but itís been a ing year. Iím going crazy with the no sex life and I want to leave so bad for another girl that can satisfy my sexual needs but I know I wonít find a better girl in terms of having a future together and marriage.

  4. #14
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    I made the mistake of telling her I am a virgin because I really thought she was one too and she acted like she was a virgin but now I recently asked her and she admitted that she had sex with her boyfriend in high school. I have no problem with that but I thought she was a virgin this whole time. So now knowing that she isnít a virgin is making me question why I canít get laid. I thought she just wasnít ready because she was still a virgin. I think that she is not doing anything with me because I bring up the issue so often and she thinks that all I want is sex. Iím like at this point yes I want sex so bad I donít understand what she is waiting for. Iím not an ugly guy or anything, 6 foot blonde hair blue eyes and skinny and fit I know she is attracted to me. I donít know why this dry spell wonít end.

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  6. #15
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    You can't imagine there would be another girl you could love, but she is out there. Do you really think there are no other beautiful women in your locality with good jobs? That's crazy. This woman isn't willing to improve the relationship with you if she refuses to have sex with you for an entire year.

    You won't have closure until you have a clean break with no more contact. When you have time to grieve a dysfunctional, dead relationship and have solo time for a good year, you will then be ready to date and choose someone who is a better match. When you find her, you will shake your head and wonder why you stayed so long with an ex who was so indifferent to you that she couldn't even bring herself to kiss you. You're worthy of someone who is crazy about you, and this woman is not.

  7. #16
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    Basically we were madly in love and had an amazing relationship and I ruined it out of no where. I donít know why but I broke up with her. It devastated her. I came back in her life and it was so hard to get her back and get her to trust me again but she did. We were doing okay but were never officially boyfriend and girlfriend again. Started fighting again and then this guy she went to school with, who is a known player, was able to form a relationship with her. Her and I kept hanging out every weekend and talking and texting like normal couples but she started hiding things from me and was going out more and I just knew she was up to something. I eventually found out when he posted a picture of her on Instagram and I was devastated. Heart broken. The girl I love is with another man. I then found some texts messages and late night phone calls and snapchats and other lies and she refused to let me go to her graduation because the other guy was going to be there and she probably told him that her and I were done but then I would have been there with her family. Iím close with her family and they really like me. Her and I were very close through all of this but she tried to hide this relationship from me. I found out and freaked out on her and she just kept denying everything and told me not to worry. I told her that Iím gone unless she ends it with this guy. She told me that she did end it with him but never showed me any proof. That was 1 year ago and Iím still not over it. I believe that they did end it but I donít know, she never blocked him or his phone number but I know that they donít hang out anymore. I should just get over it and move on but I canít for some reason. She cheated on me. I was so good to her though it all and was helping her with school financially and other stuff and always supporting her. I was the family man while she had this other guy that was fun and new. But I always stood by her side. Flash forward to now, 1 year later and we are basically boyfriend and girlfriend again and do all the things couples do. Hang out every weekend, a lot during the week. Constantly text and call and travel together. But there is no sex life! None! This is where I call her a prude and every week i bring up why arenít we having sex why wonít you kiss me why canít I touch you. We sleep together all the time but nothing. I try to make moves on her but get denied. I would be able to move on from her cheating if our relationship was better. I tell her I just feel friend zoned. 100% friend zoned. She is using me for a friend because she honestly doesnít really have any other friends. She leads me on and I always think okay today is the day the dry spell ends but it just doesnít. Iím so confused. I donít know how to get out of the dry spell. I tell her I canít be in a relationship where we donít connect on an intimate level. I canít be in a relationship with no sex life. I try to talk to her about this but she just doesnít want to have touch conversations, she is a little immature. I donít know how she can go this long without an orgasm or anything. Iím going crazy. We stay in hotels together and weíre in New York City for New Yearís Eve and had an awesome hotel and had a great night but still No sex! Nothing! I tried to make a move but was denied. Again. It makes me so frustrated.. she sees my frustration with this and that makes her think that all I want is sex. At this point it is all I want. Our relationship is awesome again and we have so much fun together besides the sex life. I donít know what to do but I donít want to leave her.

  8. #17
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    An entire year! This is crazy. Please help ENotAlone

  9. #18
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    It sounds like you keep pushing her away with your suspicions and demands for sex.

    This could explain your dry spell:
    I broke up with her and left for 7 weeks and then realized how bad I ed up and have tried getting her back ever since. A whole year! Nothing! Not even a kiss. I bring this up to her nearly every day. I think that she is not doing anything with me because I bring up the issue so often and she thinks that all I want is sex
    Last edited by kamurj; 01-24-2018 at 08:29 AM.

  10. #19
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    You are right. I do deserve someone who is crazy about me but I know this girl loves me. I donít know why she is making me suffer like this. I guess I am holding out hope that once the sex returns everything will be fine again. We will learn from our mistakes. I really love this girl and we have an undeniable connection. We have been through so much together. I donít want to hurt her again and I promised her I wonít. She tells me the sex will return and that she is not a prude. She says I need to stop trying so hard. But Iím like if Iím not trying, I know you wonít try so nothing is going to happen. I think we suffer from a bit of a cultural difference seeing she is from the Philippines and lived there until she was 7 years old. She thinks that all Americans want is sex.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member thealchemist's Avatar
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    Man you sound extremely unhappy.

    You can be in a relationship that makes you happy. You just have to end this one first and take some time to chill the f out.

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