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How do i do this


Autumn17

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I really need some advice as i dont know how i go about this. (Sorry in advance for the very long post)

My boyfriend of 8 years decided he wanted to end things last night.

 

Just a bit of background.

Over the last 8 years he has been in an out of jobs while i have been in the same stable job. He gets bored easily with the jobs and leaves them but i have stood by him and let him move on to the next job. There isnt really much stress for him at home as i take care of anything around the house.

He has a bad spending habbit so we have quite a bit of debt over the last year or so but we are managing this, it just means we pretty much have no spare money each month.

 

He took a job for a new start up company in February. He loved it at first but now he hates it and says its making him depressed. He wants to do his own thing, start up his own business but due to the debt he cant do this right now and this is getting to him.

 

The mix of him hating his job and having no money has put him in a very bad state to the point where he told me yestersay he is resigning from the job and wants to end things between us. He said he feels nothing any more for anything.

 

From my point of view, the issue isnt between us, its a bad job and no money/debt thats making him feel this way. He has said himself that he doesnt think its us but doesnt say much more than that but still just wants to end things.

 

As much as it kills me i know i have to accept this is what he wants.

We live together so the issue we now have is we have debt that needs to be paid so we cannot afford to just go our separate ways and leave. I have talked to him about it and he understands that we will still need to live together until we get everything paid back so we can then be in a position to go our separate ways.

 

With this just happening last night, i dont know how to do this while still living together. Do i try to act as normal as possible (just minus the relationship stuff) or do i just try to stay out his way completely and give him space(i can come home from work and go straight to the bedroom and avoid him completely).

 

To be honest, i really have no one i can talk to about this so any advice on the whole situation would be greatly appreciated.

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Why do you have to live together to pay off the debt? Split it up and make an agreement in writing on who owes what. This is a prime example of why you don't combine finances with someone you're not married to.

 

And boohoo for him, he doesn't like his job? Oh well, he's a man and he has responsibilities, he doesn't have the luxury of being able to quit his job. Is this guy capable of seeing past tomorrow?? Suck it up for a year or 2, pay off the debt and then he can do whatever he wants.

 

I think he did you a favor unless you enjoy having a child as a partner.

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