He’s gone

On November 7th, my best friend, Fargo, past away. I’ve cried myself to sleep every night since. I had Fargo cremated and his ashes sit on my entertainment unit. I find myself talking to his remains everyday and then I uncontrollably cry until I fall asleep. I miss him terribly but I want the grief to be over. He was literally my only source of happiness in life. (I’m crying as I write this).

Here’s a little bit about him:

I adopted him on January 16th 2013. At the shelter he was the only one not jumping up and barking at me. I asked the adoption specialist if I could meet with him and we bonded instantly. I found out he was surrendered because his owners left him with a friend while they went on vacation and they came back from vacation with another puppy and never came to pick him up. They couldn’t keep him so they just dropped him at the shelter. He came with papers and I reached out to his original breeder. I was then bombarded with emails from 2 of his previous owners thanking me for taking him in and given tips as to his personality. They all had good things to say about him.

He was a source of happiness for me. We did almost everything together. I would have taken him to the movies with me if I could. He didn’t like to play often. He was content with just chilling on couch with his head on my leg watching tv. If I gave him a squeaky toy he immediately destroyed it to get to the squeaker. He moped around the house while I got ready for work and was happy as can be when I got home. He was a bit of a celebrity at my apartment complex.

Things went sour in August. I lost my job. I had to move into my brothers house. Fargo didn’t take the move all that well. It took him a couple weeks to adapt. He managed to try and chew his way through a wooden door and injured himself. He required surgery to remove slivers of wood from the roof of his mouth. It was then discovered he was diabetic. I gave him his insulin shots like clockwork. I took him in for a glucose test a couple weeks later. The vet said he was losing blood cells extremely fast. I was instructed to keep him warm and watch him closely. I took him home to my brothers house and put him in my room while I went to grab some blankets I guess his body gave up. I walk into my room to find my 1 1/2 year old nephew petting his lifeless body. I lost it. I cried for a few hours straight. I went to bed. The first I did when I woke up was grab him his favorite treat only I realize he wasn’t there to take it. I lost it again. I lose it on a daily basis. I find myself talking his pictures like I would talk to him. I’ll absentmindedly toss a piece of pizza crust for him to eat.

I tried to adopt another dog today but he kept growling at me.

Fargo was a Staffordshire Bull Terrier. He was lazy oaf that I absolutely loved. I loved him more than anything in this world and it hurts to not have him by my side.

Awwww, I'm crying with you ((((hugs))))

I'm so sorry. I have experienced your pain several times throughout my life with dear pets.

Find comfort in knowing he isn't suffering, and that he was well cared for and loved.

In time you will find the right fit to adopt again. I hope you feel better really soon .

Awww. So sorry you lost your furry baby. Dogs are the best. Just think about how he had some happiness and acceptance from you instead of living with a person who wouldn't like him, living in a shelter or early dealth. You gave each other some happiness. He gave you all that he had and you gave back to him. It was perfect and now it's done, except for the remembering. You'll be a great owner to another lost puppy when you're ready.

I’m so very sorry for your loss. I can deeply empathize.

Fargo was very lucky to have you.

Have faith that when the time is right, you will find a special companion again.

(((Big hugs)))

Leave a bowl down for him to show he is always welcome.

Aww I am so sorry for your loss, losing them is the worst side of having a pet! But you gave Fargo a great life, one that he wouldn't have had without you, so take comfort in that. He will never be replaced, you will always remember him, but with time there will be less tears and more joyful memories. I still have my 2 cats' urns, 6 and 8 years later, and although I miss them dearly, I now smile remembering their funny expressions and things they used to do. The cats I have now are in no way a replacement, but I love them just as much.

When you're ready for another companion, you'll know.

Aw, I'm so sorry. (hugs) I'm glad that you got to spend the time with him that you did - it sounds like you both felt a lot of love during that period.

Leave a bowl down for him to show he is always welcome.

There’s a bowl and a bed.