Beastelstein Posted January 16, 2018 Share Posted January 16, 2018 Me and my girlfriend have been some problems lately with who does what. Some background: she's on disability and I work full time. I still help with cooking, do the dishes, take the dog out and take the trash out even though I work. I don't mind doing these things but the issue comes when I'm tired or don't do things when/how she wants. Some examples: I was to grab white vinegar and drinks after taking her to a family party but kicked back for roughly an hour till the party was over, she was pissed that I didn't do it. This morning we had to take the dog to the vet and I was eating my cereal before letting her out. My girlfriend was like "You put yourself before the dog" I told her to let her out herself and it caused more fighting. Overall the problem is that she wants me to do things and is picky about the methodology. One or the other would be alright. Link to comment
DancingFool Posted January 16, 2018 Share Posted January 16, 2018 This doesn't sound like division of labor problem at all. Sounds more like your gf is controlling to an extreme. You aren't going to change her personality so either you put up with it, try to fight with her until you are fed up and exhausted, or dump her and find better for yourself. Link to comment
Liraele Posted January 16, 2018 Share Posted January 16, 2018 You could try to sit down and have a conversation about the way you guys each handle things... including the frustration with things when they aren't done the way the other wants them to be. It doesn't sound like a division of labor issue so much as it does your girlfriend expecting you to do things in the manner and order that she would... and that's just unrealistic. So managing expectations and having a frank discussion about things is necessary if you guys are going to continue to coexist. Link to comment
catfeeder Posted January 17, 2018 Share Posted January 17, 2018 I would negotiate new rules: whoever wants something done gets to do it themselves, just as they would if they lived alone. Asking for help is allowed, but something of equal value needs to be offered to the other in exchange. Anyone who criticizes the other's skills pays 20 bucks on the spot if called on it. Link to comment
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