Enmeshed relationships

I feel enmeshed with my partner. We talk several times daily and there is texting when we are not talking. I have gotten to the point where I desire less contact and more autonomy.

Is it possible to fix a codependent, enmeshed relationship while In it or is it best to go our separate ways? I really would like to work on myself. I see a counselor and feel stronger than ever. The difficulty comes when my partner questions changes I've made. The changes are positive, but I suppose change is hard for a significant other.

I feel enmeshed with my partner. We talk several times daily and there is texting when we are not talking. I have gotten to the point where I desire less contact and more autonomy.

Is it possible to fix a codependent, enmeshed relationship while In it or is it best to go our separate ways? I really would like to work on myself. I see a counselor and feel stronger than ever. The difficulty comes when my partner questions changes I've made. The changes are positive, but I suppose change is hard for a significant other.

You sound smothered. Between your previous thread and this one, you two are incompatible and a really bad match. YES, it is best to go your separate ways. I'm surprised you're still with her.

You've been talking about basically the same issue with this woman for over a year. You can't stop her form being controlling and emotionally manipulated. That is work she need to do. Does she want to fix her controlling nature?

As a side note I wouldn't call your dynamic "enmeshed"... that's more like you can't function without each other or see each other as extensions of yourself. This sounds like you do fine without her and she gets emotionally manipulative when you do things by yourself. She makes you feel bad for having any part of your life not revolving around her. That's no fun.

Why are you still with her? Do you have porn-like sex and are addicted to that?

What does your therapist say about all this?

I'm going to tell you what I told you last time you complained about your chosen lot because evidently you are still enabling her to be the very person you don't want her to be.

If you're going to stay with her then stop tolerating her petulant, childish behaviour. Next time you go out with family or friends and she chooses not to join her then any criticism she has of the festivities should be answered with a change of the subject after you've told her, "well I had a blast." No more no less and do not let her carry it on. Do not reply to anything further on that particular subject. You may want to actually tell her what you've told us (if you haven't already) and give her a chance to remedy.

You all gave me really great advice. We have separated and I feel so much better. Sometimes I miss the good times but overall I feel I am a better person without that relationship.

You all gave me really great advice. We have separated and I feel so much better. Sometimes I miss the good times but overall I feel I am a better person without that relationship.

Good on you. *claps*

Have a happy and abundant New Year ahead.