Telling Family I am Dating a Dad

Hi, I am new here so I am hoping I've picked the right board to post this in.. I am 29 years old and have no children of my own but I have started dating a very nice man and he has two wonderful children. 2 boys. 2 and 8.

I am a little worried about how to tell my family that I am dating someone with children. I feel like they will be unsupportive, tell me that I am not mature enough to possibly be a step parent, that I should find someone without children etc etc. It's really kind of stressing me out because they're also the same parents that ask when am I going to give them grandbabies. Has anyone else gone through anything similar with their family?

 

Edit. I thought I would add that I want children but can't have children physically. Charlie is also a wonderful dad. He spends as much time as possible with his kids. Fully involved with after school activities, financial support, sees them every day he is in town and talks to them on the phone when he isn't. (He is a truck driver.)

Hi, I am new here so I am hoping I've picked the right board to post this in.. I am 29 years old and have no children of my own but I have started dating a very nice man and he has two wonderful children. 2 boys. 2 and 8.

I am a little worried about how to tell my family that I am dating someone with children. I feel like they will be unsupportive, tell me that I am not mature enough to possibly be a step parent, that I should find someone without children etc etc. It's really kind of stressing me out becausealso the same parents that ask when am I going to give them grandbabies. Has anyone else gone through anything similar with their family?

Wait, what? Your parents are asking you when you're going to give them grandbabies and you're not even in a committed relationship such as live-in or marriage?

 

How long have you been dating this father? You say you "just started." Are you exclusively dating at this point?

You're 29. I think you're old enough to date who you want but I find your parents to be irresponsible if they are pressuring you to have children when you don't even yet have a boyfriend past the 'just started dating' stage. Do you even know if this guy wants more children?

I think it's ironic that they tell you that you're not mature enough, yet also believe they have the right to weigh in on the decisions you make as a 29-year old adult.

How long have you been dating? Why do your parents dictate your life? You are 29, not 18.

Wait, what? Your parents are asking you when you're going to give them grandbabies and you're not even in a committed relationship such as live-in or marriage?

 

How long have you been dating this father? You say you "just started." Are you exclusively dating at this point?

You're 29. I think you're old enough to date who you want but I find your parents to be irresponsible if they are pressuring you to have children when you don't even yet have a boyfriend past the 'just started dating' stage. Do you even know if this guy wants more children?

 

Yep.. apparently turkey baster would be good enough if it produced grandbabies. I know. Trust me I know.

 

We are dating exclusively. We haven't really been dating that long but I know he doesn't want anymore children.

 

It's not that I would stop the relationship because of my parents judgement but it is still just bothersome that they are unsupportive.

How long have you been dating? Why do your parents dictate your life? You are 29, not 18.

Not too terribly long and I wouldn't stop the relationship because of the judgement, I'm not allowing them the control. It is just under my skin to not have my parents support when their only complaint will be that he is a dad. It's not like he's a dead beat dad either. I don't know. I guess it's hard to explain wanting family approval even when you're an adult.

How long have you been dating?

I think you just have to accept that your parents won't approve of every decision you make. It's hard I know. I would talk with your boyfriend about whether he'd be open to having more children in case you want to adopt or do surrogacy, etc.

Yep.. apparently turkey baster would be good enough if it produced grandbabies. I know. Trust me I know.

 

We are dating exclusively. We haven't really been dating that long but I know he doesn't want anymore children.

 

It's not that I would stop the relationship because of my parents judgement but it is still just bothersome that they are unsupportive.

Well, if you don't want any children (have to assume you do not if you are dating a man that doesn't want anymore) then why not just tell your parents that you do not want children? (least then they would stop asking you that question) Once they come to terms with that realization then you can tell them who you are dating and that he has children that, if all goes well, they can treat as their own.