How can I get her back? Do I stand a chance?

Okay guys I totally regret what I said to this girl I was dating for 3 months. We currently split 2 days ago and I just got assigned to a new department at my job with different days off and a hectic schedule so I've been stressed. Last saturday she blew up on me via text. We had plans to hang out that day after I was off. I texted her right away when I was off but wanted to relax first. Two hours pass by and she told me NVM she doesnt want to go out cause she was annoyed of me.

When she said that, it got the best out of me and I asked her what her problem is? She told me how I take forever to text her back, i never call her (Im not a phone person, we live so close but its a struggle to see me more than once a week (We hang out once a week and I pay 90% for our outings dinner/movies/etc and Im on a budget so I tend not to want to hang out with her more than once a week. She told me how everything seemed to be on my time only and that she didnt feel important.

I was such an about it cause I totally wasnt having it that day due to work and I had a headache so I told her I was getting the feeling that she was looking for something more serious from me and if that was the case, I didnt want to mislead her. I told her I liked her and shes a great person but I wasnt looking to get into something serious right now. I totally regret saying that as now after thinking about things I miss her and I feel like I lost a potential long term relationship.

She responded back with why i didnt mention all that when we had started dating and asked if I was hoping if she would be ok in this grey waiting area and hanging out and having se.x doing all the things couples do when theyre together but have the loophole of actually not being together so there are no time constraints. She said she was in no rush to be with me officially but wanted a little more consideration and respect and wanted to be in the loop of where we were trying to go with this but she guesses I had no plans of it going anywhere past where we already are. She also thanked me for my time and said happy holidays.

I was being so selfish an and that day and just said Im too busy with work, thanks for understanding, and happy holidays to her too. She responded back right away with Im not too busy and im just not interested enough. Shes heard that excuse so many times before and thought I was different. She lastly stated that she wasnt being understanding at all and to please delete her number. I didnt respond back to that and went NC after.

Its day 2 and shes been in my head ever since. Im regretting every moment of it. I want to get her back but do you guys think there is a chance? Im planning to text her and ask if we could talk in person. Ill bring her roses and after we talk I want to reserve us a nice dinner to somewhere nice that shes been wanting to try. How should I go from here? I want to apologize to her and tell her I was wrong and i want to make it work for us. I feel like shes gone for good as shes not the type to wait around

Why are you posting the same thread, again?

Weren't you crushing on another girl a month back? You are all over the place.

The only reason you want the FWB, is because she dumped you. Do her a favor and leave her alone.

It sounds like you may have some commitment issues. If it's all on you're time it gets old fast for a lady. She basically is wantkng more of your time and attention and you don't seem to be giving it. Now that she's gone with distance between you, you feel safe to move towards her and getting her roses and dinner and such. But if you bring her back in you may go back to your distant ways. Yes you probably did lose a potential long term relationship but it seems to me you should be asking yourself if you really want that bc your actions don't seem to show that. You need to recognize that if you get anxiety of someone trying to get closer to you, you have to manage that and try to go beyond it. After 3 months a d if you're sleeping together, once a week dating and no phone calls or other communication than text is not enough In my book. I imagine the same goes for her, especially if youre monogamous which it seems you both were.

Based on your description of the relationship it is easy to see why your ex felt you were not interested. Maybe you should leave it and free yourself to meet someone you are truly into. I think since she's been through this before you will have a difficult time persuading her back...plus she requested that you delete her number.

Based on your description of the relationship it is easy to see why your ex felt you were not interested. Maybe you should leave it and free yourself to meet someone you are truly into. I think since she's been through this before you will have a difficult time persuading her back...plus she requested that you delete her number.

I asked for girls perspective about the deleting her number part and from all this she said she is guilt tripping me to care. She wants me to care about how angry she is and a sign to her that she means something to me. She is hoping that I will tell her that I changed my mind or that I still want to see her. She also wants to know if I will miss her thats why she said to delete her number.

That's from a girl's perspective that said that to me. What do you think? I'm falling for her but I will give it another day and I'll text her to see if she can talk.

Im planning to text her and ask if we could talk in person. Ill bring her roses and after we talk I want to reserve us a nice dinner to somewhere nice that shes been wanting to try.

OP, do you have any idea how insincere that is going to seem? You already had your chance to pull out the big stops. You blew it. As a woman, I would be very turned off if the guy who just broke it off with me suddenly changed his mind when I decided to agree to the break-up, and performed some grand gesture. Too contrived and too late.

Apologizing was fine. But she sounds very fed up and very done with you. You don't know what you want and she sees that. Inconsistency is a huge red flag; one day you don't want her, the next day you do? No. We usually run from guys like that, because they've demonstrated themselves to be wishy-washy and selfish.

I don't think there's much chance with her, speaking from a woman's point of view. She is looking for someone consistent, present and clear-minded. As I said in your previous thread, you need to sort yourself out. She sees you're too messy and too much work.

So all of you ladies are suggesting to let her go and just leave her alone? I’m sure she’s hurting just as much or more than me..

And most smart women are not going to want to return to the source of their pain, OP.

You had the opportunity to associate good memories and affectionate thoughts when she thinks of you. Instead, she's now associating frustration, anger, flakiness and hurt with you. That's not going to help matters at all.

JDM... let me see if I have your timeline correct.. because there is a lot going on with you.

In Jan of 17 you said you broke up with your GF of 4 years.

Feb 2017....You posted your heart was ripped out, you wanted to wish your X a happy B-day.. now lets fast fwd..

Aug 2017....You posted about seeing a girl for 4 months and how she makes you think of your GF. So you met her in April, just 2 months after you said you felt like your X ripped your heart out. (this post had nothing to do with the girl you were dating, you were looking for a replacement for your X)

Sept 2017...You want to date again.

Dec 2017... You post about a girl you have been dating for 3 months. So that means you started in Aug, or in Sept which means you were only a month out from the previous relationship.

You mentioned earlier in other posts that you 30, still live at home and your job doesn't pay well. Have you changed anything in your personal life?

In my non professional view. You are still trying to replace your X. You seem to be projecting your lust/love of your X to these other girls. Since they are not your X, you give them low priority in your life. Step back from dating, focus on making you happy first.