In hindsight?!

Hi all so I am currently 8 days no contact with my ex boyfriend (we've been broken up about a month and broke nc due to him texting how are you(breadcrumbs) and me going to collect my belongings). Now I'm fully activating no contact/going strong.

Basically cut a long story short I really wanted to reach out to him today to meet (telling myself it's for closure) but I decided against and read an article which hit the nail on the head throughout our relationship looking back.

Throughout our relationship I noticed a pattern my boyfriend would do something that he knew would upset me (stay out all night on a bender with no contact or something along th lines) he then would say "I don't want to argue" (we may have just been talking about stuff). This was a theme throughout our relationship "I don't want to argue" when he went to ibiza and didn't contact me once for example. It's really happened the whole way through. Even how he treated me was really bad at the end and he said "we argue a lot". I just don't get it every time I would try to address an issue it's apparently an argument or a discussion I would call it that he doesn't want to have.

What on earth was going on?! I mean to sort a problem I would communicate there is a problem tell him I love him but please can we get past this and I was always met with resistance on his part! Can anyone identify with this type of behaviour?

The guy's irresponsible. He's all into himself and he probably doesn't care about you or anybody else. His "I don't want to argue" comment is just a way of avoiding talking about his irresponsibility. I think it's pretty clear that this is the way he would treat you if the relationship had gone on longer. You're lucky to be ending it now.

Thanks! Think you're indeed correct and I'm lucky to be getting away. Just need to work on myself and move forward thank you !!

People like him are not really ready for relationships. Relationships require communication, even when one is upset. Shutting all of that down indicates his desire to find a way forward with you just wasn't there.

He wants to do what he wants, when he wants, and not be held accountable. That's fine, but he really is better off single in that case. Relationships are a two-way street. He's still traveling one-way.

You are correct, once in a little conversation he said il do what I want, when I want and with who I want. That says it all really 😂 I mean I am all for going out and letting people live there life but when I know he's just going to go on a bender or something equally unproductive it's just like really again? gets boring very quickly!